Confessions of a Yunkosexual

in #yunk7 years ago (edited)

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It's time I confess a dirty little secret, Steemit... I am a yunkosexual!

This is a relatively new addition to the LGBTQQIAAXY diaspora and maybe you've never met one of us. So let me take a few minutes to tell you what that means to me!

Yun·ko·sex·u·al

/jʌŋk əˈsekSH(o͞o)əl/

adjective

  1. (of a person) sexually attracted to people who are @yunkzilla

  2. a person who is sexually attracted to people who are yunk.
    synonyms: yunkophile, yunker

I didn't realize I was different until just yesterday. Before the Yunk came into my life I always knew I was different...waiting for something just outside of my peripheral vision. I was hungry for a word be a pun for anything from fuck to funky to yuck and even pull in junk!

Then came Yunkin!

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Initially I was off put by this incredibly handsome man. His portrait seemed too professional, too perfect.
He also accused me of trademarking some important words which made me instantly suspicious.

My suspicions began to crumble the more I interacted with him. He's a talented photographer which explains why his portrait looks so damn good.

I don't usually go for the tattooed type, but I found the intricate designs upon his lean arms hypnotic. As if that moth on his wrist was my mother, and the scorpion on his forearm my best friend from high school.

Yunk became a word synonymous with a misty morning sunrise between redwood trees and the sound the ocean makes when it breaks over our rocky shore.

yunk yunk yunk

cries the night bird on my windowsill.

yunk yunk yunk

is the sound of desire pulsing through my veins

The more I considered his head tilted at a congenial angle, his lips spread white over perfect teeth, and his admittedly silly hipster mustache draping over his opening mouth... as if to say Yunk.... the more I became enchanted.

I didn't just want to yunk his brains out.. I wanted to be Yunk. to live inside yunk...

... so on Monday I'm going to the plastic surgeon to have yunkoplasty, I can finally live my life as the dapper Asian hunk with cool tattoos that I've always been inside!

All proceeds from this post will go to the Y.U.N.K. Fund to spread the good news of yunk and also buy me some pizza...

and in all seriousness you need @yunkzilla in your life. Follow him, vote for him, he is the best! Confused? Good it's working... check out: https://steemit.com/yunk/@yunkzilla/exposing-steemit-s-secret-hastag-yunk-what-is-this-secret-upvote-society

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Well done post You deserve for getting Upvote from me. I appreciate on it and like it so much . Waiting for your latest post. Keep your good work and steeming on. Let's walk to my blog. I have a latest post. Your upvote is high motivation for me. Almost all Steemians do their best on this site. Keep steeming and earning.

Did you read the same post that I did? Yunk bless and keep you.

Thanks

He might not be a yunker yet.

thanks for reply, Please visit my blog and SUPPORT

Thanks

This comment has received a 0.11 % upvote from @booster thanks to: @hamzaoui.

This comment has received a 0.11 % upvote from @booster thanks to: @hamzaoui.

This comment has received a 0.11 % upvote from @booster thanks to: @hamzaoui.

This post received a 3.5% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @yunkzilla! For more information, click here!

Good god Renee, keep your yunk in the closet! You're getting pizza everywhere

This is getting out of hand.

lol. @prufarchy gets 500 yunkcoins

That sounds suspiciously close "Goody Cole's a Witch!"

I like it

69 out of 5 yunks. Quality yunk post

How do you sleep at night knowing you take away people's 69? This post is yunktastic

Being yunkosexual has opened me up to so much more flavors in life that not everyone will get to taste.

Clipboard - July 14, 2017 1-43 AM (1).png
(meme cred. @kevinwong)

omg, I think I need to come out too, o.o As a Yunker.

I already did. It was the best thing I've ever done. My life is like a cool breeze now. Self identified as yunk

Hmmm.. I feel like I'm missing some context here. Don't explain this to me though, I must spend time on this. I must.. learn..

This still makes me tingle in all the right places...
(certified yunk-tastic)
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