Since our childhood we heard that we should have high I.Q and we have to increase it. But friends it's not at all true that if we have high I.Q then only we will get success. To get success in life there is one more thing that you should know that is Emotional Intelligence (E.Q). You may be thinking, what is emotional intelligence? We have heard about I.Q but from where did E.Q come from.
Why Emotional Intelligence is more important than I.Q.
A high E.Q person is the one who identify other's feelings and emotion and identifying their own capacity. And by that they make changes in their thought process and take right decision according to that. And knowing their own emotion, handling their life and taking right decision in life and accomplish their goal.
To get success IQ have only 20% credit and rest 80% credit goes to our Emotional intelligence.
What we get from emotional intelligence?
- Self-Motivation
- Persistence
- Impulse Control
- Mood Regulation
- Empathy
I.Q and E.Q don't oppose each other, they always co-ordinate with each other.A person may be brilliant because of his high I.Q but because of his low E.Q he/she will have problems in life. Till now you may heard that the person who scores well or top in college or school or remember all the thing that he/she studies or have knowledge about everything are the one who have high I.Q. But only having high I.Q will not give happiness and life satisfaction. You may have seen many top scientist, business man, multi-millionaire, popular actors, doctor have high I.Q. But Despite of high I.Q they have low E.Q. Because of this they had committed suicide. You can search it on google. They all had high I.Q then why did they committed suicide? Because of their low E.Q they were not able to understand to their emotion and situation and that's why they take this steps. This is the reason, why we should give same importance to have high E.Q like high I.Q. If we have both then we will be able to handle success, happiness, relationship and social life.
Now let's discuss how many type of emotions are there? And why we should know about it?
Different Types of Human Emotions
According to Worlds most popular psychologist Robert Pluctchik's Theory there are basic emotions like
- Excited
- Sadness
- Anger
- Seek
- Surprise
- Happy
- Unhappy
- Bored
If we know about this emotions then we increase our self-awareness. We will discuss about self-awareness in details. This 8 emotion that we feel affects our behavior. If you feel good then your behavior is also good and if your behave well then you will have good relationship with other that will help you to grow in personal and professional life. If we know how to react at that situation by understanding our emotion then it will make our life easier.
Author of the book (Emotional Intelligence) Denial Goleman given 4 big ideas to increase your Emotional Intelligence.
If you want to know about it in details then you can buy it by CLICKING HERE.
Self-Awareness : Knowing your emotions.
If we want to increase your emotional intelligence then we have to increase our self-awareness. Those who have high E.Q they know their own emotion, strength and weakness. They know how their feeling is impacting on them and their work. They are honest to themselves and others. They understand their goals and value very well. They are not only confident on themselves but they also know their limitations. Which mean they know what they can do and what they can't? Because of this self-awareness if they face failure then they will somehow come out from this.
Self-Management: Managing your emotions and handling your feelings.
There were two college student John and Alex both were preparing for bank exams. They heard that there is a good coaching class that help students to clear bank exam and many of their student were working in bank. Then both decided to join the class. John First enter the class and ask the teacher “I have to take admission in your class". Then the teacher replied "You have come too late, my class is full now". After listening this John become angry and replied "I'm giving you the fees still you don't want to give me admission. You don't know me, I have many contacts. If you don't give me admission then I will close your coaching class ". Then teacher replied "Do what you want to do but I can't give you admission". Then john left the class. Alex watched everything, then he goes enters the class for admission then he asked the teacher "Sir, it may happen many time that people may come who talks very rudely with you and you may be face problem". Then teacher replied "Yes, it happens many time, but many people come like you who talk to me politely". Then Alex says "Sir, I have to take admission in your class". Then teacher replied " You have come too late my class is full now ". Then Alex replied "its ok sir, it anyone leave the class then let me know". And the teacher note down his phone number. After 2 days a student left the class due to some reason then the teacher call Alex and give him admission but he don't even call john. Here situation is same but here how you react to other, it effects on the final result. In this story you can see that Alex's work was done but not John's. But if John also understand the situation and handle it then he can also get the admission.
Conclusion: John have low E.Q and Alex have high E.Q. The person who have high E.Q they can also handle complex situation easily. They are proactive. They know what they have to do and what not. Emotionally intelligent people can understand their own emotion and other. And by changing their own emotion they handle the situation. High E.Q people have such a behavior that they make others feel important and respect other, and in response they get back that respect.
Social Awareness: Mastering the fundamental people skill
The more you have self-awareness the more you will understand the others feeling. The people who can understand other people’s feeling they become more popular, more outgoing and more sensitive.
Sympathy Vs Empathy
There are two type of people
1.Sympathy
2.Empathy
Let's understand it with an example. Connect your life with the story. And what will you do when you are at that situation? Let's check weather you have low E.Q or high E.Q. Suppose your friend Johnny fails in exam, and he tell you about his failure?
What will you do? It's Obvious that Johnny is mentally disturbed. And at that situation you say this "I said you earlier that if you don't study well then you will fail and now face the punishment for what you did". And after listening this your friend Johnny will get upset, and he will think "how rude my friend is he is just pouring salt on my sadness". In this situation you are antipathy, which mean you have 0 E.Q. If you reply “Today I have some work I will talk to you tomorrow ". Then you are Apathy. In this situation your friend will feel bad but not that much like in Antipathy. In this you have Low E.Q. Sympathy, in this situation you will say "oh god! This should not be happened with you, I feel bad for you ". In this you will understand that it has happened bad to him but you will not understand his emotion. Here also you have Low E.Q. Last is Empathy. Which mean you will be able to feel Johnny's emotion and you will consider his pain as your own pain and you will do something for him. To make him feel good you will spend time with him, you go out with him for fun. If you do this then you have high Emotional intelligent.
So Friends if you get high E.Q then people respect you, give complements and your value will increase.
This story is to understand our emotion. Connect yourself with the story and identify yourself in which category you are in and let us know in comment section.Relationship Management: Handling relationships and dealing with other people.