We live in a world where all we know ourselves to be has been borrowed from TV, movies or stories from others. Our charachters we play all come from vision of how we think things will be. We see a beautiful person on the screen doing something like hiking, driving a nice car or holding the hand of a lover and we feel an emotion of happiness.
That scene provides happiness.
Photo by Frank Okay on Unsplash
We then strive in every way to make this happen so we can be happy.
Love is a very strong dream. Its our escape from ourself, from boring to something hopeful. New relationships offer love in a very easy manner. A new person, a new kiss, a new place to visit and learn and get to know one another. This is all still a huge dream. Its a play. The dream continues into years and then to keep the fire going marriage takes place.
Marriage the ultimate form of love.
This then creates another dream. A house, a family and a nice bubble of life. This dream becomes a play with charachters entrenched in their roles. All of this is done to avoid the pain and fear of dying alone. Our biggest fear.
So we gather happiness tools, borrowed charachters from tv, relationships and the way it ought to be. We do all we can to create the Norman Rockwell painted moments.
In truth all of this from the charachter borrowing to the family marriage bubble offer us a platform completely far away from our real truth.
Our real truth is the boring. It is the endless place felt sitting alone on a beach where there is no YOU.
Just this....
Our love relationships change and fade and what is there is a simple living in .. just this... a relaxing into the acceptance of what is there. To sit on the couch with another and not want anything different. Just the being together, caring and sitting in the complete nothing to do state and enjoying it.
When we rest into the nothing to do and are ok with it... we rest in Love.
This can not be portrayed very easily on TV. It doesnt sell anything, it doesnt make anyone want anything. It doesnt paint a story or charachter in the play of life. No one appears there, nothing to do, a simple empty moment so full to be explored. Richer than any hot relationship, that will fade leaving pain.
Give up, fall and go for boring, find the empty canvas that all colors fall upon. This is home.