snowmachine..what an amazing heartfelt story. I too have had similar experiences. It took a good friend of mine coming from London to pull me out of my depressions and feelings of being alone. Just remember, the past in gone, the future hasn't happened yet, therefore all we have is the here and now. When I feel those feelings creeping back, I simply call my dog, we get in my car and go for a ride to either the beach or simply to town. Exercise and meditation techniques where you learn to simply let go of thoughts and connect with source has really helped me make giant leaps in my progression. Also, friends that truly care are God's gifts! They kick our butts and bring us back to a state of joy and gratitude. Sounds like you have an amazing councilor. Keep doing what yo are doing. ALOHA