GIRLS HATE WRESTLING [019 | Time for some... TLC!]

 Girls Hate Wrestling is a blog run by a girl, who in fact, LOVES pro-wrestling. This was originally an idea for a youtube series with my  best friend, but that never happened. Now it's a blog of me channeling my love of a testosterone fueled soap opera of greased up   men  in underwear battling to lay on top of each  other for 3  seconds... sometimes for a belt.

[DING DING DING]
    I LOVE TLC. This takes me back to my roots. EDGE & CHRISTIAN brought the chairs, THE HARDY BOYZ were (and still are) all about the ladders, and THE DUDLEYS gave us what we wanted tables..


    But back to 2017, we got a Raw exclusive ppv in Minneapolis, Minnesota at the Target Center coming up this Sunday, October 22. This match card is mostly solid. I'm really excited for MOST of this card. We got a MASSIVE TLC Match, The Women's and Cruiserweight championships on the line and a main roster debut. Let's break this ppv down.

3-on-5 Handicap TLC Match

The Shield vs The Miz, Cesaro and Sheamus, Braun Strowman and Kane
    The Shield reunion happened and WOW! Who would have thought that would get Jabroman over. Of course crazy Dean ran his mouth a lil' bit, as he does, and decided that once again, one of the greatest factions in the company can take on, ohhh 4 or 5 guys. And since Dean and Seth are Tag Champs, Cesaro and Sheamus are DEFINITELY involved. Miz clearly is going to jump on this since he's been hating on the Shield and Jabroman for a hot minute. Braun just likes to fuck shit up and they need his "monster" image to stay. KANE FUCKING CAME BACK WITH ALL HIS FIRE AND THROUGH THE RING FLOOR and just demolished Jabroman in a steel cage matchup against Braun, stipulation being Braun wins, it's a 3-5.  Chokeslams and Tombstone Piledrivers will keep even the biggest dog down. I AM ALL AROUND PUMPED FOR THIS MATCH. Don't care who wins, just make it amazing beautiful, please guys.

Women's Championship

Alexa Bliss (c) vs Mickie James
    Alexa called Mickie old. Mickie calls Alexa a biscuit butt or some dumb country bullshit. I don't care about this. Moving on. Sorry ladies. The wrestling is decent, but goddamn storyline is preeeetty bad.

Singles Match

"The Demon" Finn Balor vs Sister Abigail/Bray Wyatt
    WHY. IS. THIS. STILL. HAPPENING.  I don't understand what's happening. I either can't pay attention or HEAR bray's fucking promos so I have lost every bit of interest in this gimmick. Finn is usually the highlighting factor in this. This weird feud has gone on for so long. AND NOW BRAY IS SISTER ABIGAIL?!?!?! WHAT!? Is he going to wrestle in a fucking veil? Wuuuuut is going on here. I basically wanna see Finn in some paint and kick Bray's ass and end this dumb shit. OVER IT. 

Cruiserweight Championship

Kalisto (c) vs Enzo Amore
So Enzo beat Neville for the belt, (Neville was SUPPOSED to have a rematch and win it back to drop later to whoever but walked out, so...) Kalisto debuts in the division and SNATCHES it from Zo in a Lumberjack match. Enzo had no locker room friends, and now he's got a little posse and Kalisto is buddies with Mustafa Ali. So Zo is getting his rematch at TLC, and we'll see where this shit takes the Cruiserweight division.

Singles Match

Asuka vs Emma
    ASUKA IS HERE! The undefeated NXT Women's Champ is getting her Main Roster debut at TLC. Emma doesn't stand a fucking chance. Asuka is gunna knock her lights out. SHE IS NO JABRONI. The Women's division is IN TROUBLE. Gunna need to step up that game ladies. 

Cruiserweight Tag Team Match

Rich Swann and Cedric Alexander vs Jack Gallagher and The Brian Kendrick (Lemmy)
    Honestly, I don't often watch 205live, and kinda just update myself as needed. I am not surprised at the Rich/Cedric team. That's been a "hey we're good buddies" deal since the cruiserweight division came back. But Jack and Brian Kendrick caught me surprise and MAN DO I LOVE IT. I fucking love scoundrel ass Lemmy teaming up with that crazy Bristish dude. Jack was always entertaining when I did watch more regularly but heel Jack is FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC. Brian Kendrick was facing Cedric and Jack comes out and he had recent beef with Brian, but he took out the umbrella (I forgot it's name!) and beats up Cedric with it and then him and Lemmy teamed up. Rich comes out to save Cedric as usual. There ya go!

Kick-off Match

Sasha Banks vs Alicia Fox
    I WILL NOT HAVE A REVIEW FOR THIS MATCH. Not wasting my time. Alicia Fox is a fucking nutjob in the most annoying way. It's unappealing, difficult to sit through, and if creative had ANY FUCKING SENSE (clearly not since Alicia is acting how she does) they wouldn't allow this SCREECHING bitch on tv.  and I honestly feel terrible that Sasha is down to kick-off show bullshit against Alicia. Holy fuck do I want to bash Fox's face in. The sound she makes is horrific.



So there's the matches coming up on Sunday. Stay tuned for a followup post. (I PROMISE NEW CONTENT) I just have to have time for it. I'm getting things ready. You'll all love it.

Keep it a Jabroni Free Zone!

[DING DING DING]