Reflection -HUSBANDS AND WIVES , STOP WASTING YOUR TIME PRAYING -MY REV FATHER ON SUNDAY.
Marx and his wife don't sit next to each other during Church services.
Even when going to Church services, they go in different vehicles; and when they travel in the same car, it is usually a very quiet and uncomfortable ride.
Marx sat at his usual spot in the Church service; the fourth line on the far left row. His wife sat on the center row.
My Rev father took to the podium.
Husbands, stop wasting your time praying, the Rev began.
The congregants got alarmed. No one expects to hear a Rev saying prayer is a waste of time.
I am not here to discourage you to pray, but to encourage you to pray right.
Husbands, stop wasting your time praying if you are not treating your wives well.
You come to church driving your expensive cars, giving your offerings and tithes, active in Church, some of you are Church leaders; but how are you treating your wife?
You may look good to us Church members, but it is your wife and children that know who you truly are" said the Rev.
Marx turned to face his wife. She looked at him. Marx could see her eyes.
Her left eye swollen from the blow he gave her last week when she confronted him about his alcoholism, pornography use and mischievous behavior.
People couldn't tell she had a black eye because of the make up she had on, so well done.
The Rev continued, "People have perfected the art of cover up. Here in Church, so many are hurting But you won't know.
People come wearing their nice clothes, shining smiles, they are active in ministry but hurting a lot in marriage.
We have become numb and plastic, brushing things wonder the carpet. But today we shall heal and address those wounds we hide.
The Rev father cleared his throat and continued,
Many of those hurting their spouse are using the church to hide.
They thinks that because they give offerings, and tithes, because they make public prayers, because they read the word, because they hold leadership position in church they are right with God, God is also interested in what you do in your marriage and family.
The word says when you treat your wife badly it hinders your prayers. Men, you claim to be prayerful.
Hear this, your first ministry is your home.
Stop trying to blackmail God with your service in church yet you are mean and hurtful towards your spouse.
Many of the members of the congregation got restless and unsettled.
My Rev father, continued many of those who are be hurt by their spouse hide their pain and want to project their image that all is well to validate that they are blesses and in control.
Some of you are active in church to run away from the pain in your marriages.
The congregations was silent. Some straightening their ties, others adjusting their sitting position.
This Rev father was preaching truth and it was uncomfortable.
The Rev father continued, the husband are not the only one guilty here. Wives don't you no that the bible say when your husband found you he found good virtuous woman and you brought favour,?.
Them why are you the source of your husband stress and headache, have you been so toxic that you have turned your prayerful husband into a prayer less husband?
Do you make he regretting marring you because you bring more complications more than he had before marring you.?.
How you treat your husband stumbling block in his walk with God.
Many of you wives married your individual husbands primarily because of their relationship with God, so now why are you destroying their relationship with God, instead of celebrating it.
Why are you being a burden to your husband emotionally, spiritually, socially, sexually and financially instead of being one who brings favour?
Marx wife's looked at her husband, Marx looked at her and she looked away.
The Rev father paused to drink his glass of water.
And he continued, when I am thirsty, I drink a glass of water.
When your spouse get thirsty, will you allow God to use you to bless your spouse..?.
You've been told that sermons that focus on you as an individual, that God will make you proper as an individual.
I am here to tell you that your blessing are tied to people, you are blessed to be a blessings to other. Our God is not a God of individualistic God.
Your blessing is tied to your marriage, your family. It is not about you, but about God and God is love.
What good is it proper and be successful when you have no love, it is all vanity.
God cares about your family, how you treat your spouse and children's.
Silence..silence..silence..
Yes, we pray. But what kind of prayers does your spouse pray because of you..,???
Is it to plead with God to change you from the monster you have become.
Is it to plead for grace to deal with how difficult you are? Or is to give thanks for you?
Silence.... Silence as grave yard..
Are you really prayerful?, do you really value prayer,. What is prayer?
Them why is it that many of you finds it easy to come to us (Rev, pastor) for us to pray with you as an individual, you finds it easy to pray in the public, in church services and bible study but finds it so hard to pray with your spouse?...
Isn't that telling of what is going on your marriage, don't you know that the more you pray with your spouse the stronger your marriage will be.
But how can you find it easy to pray with a spouse who hurt you or who you hurt?.
The Rev father paused and look at the congregation. Eye staring at him.
I challenge you to pray with your spouse and try to treat your spouse well, you most savne your home, your marriage, your love.!
Husband, you are the head of the home, I challenge you to stand up and go to where your wife is and pray with her as a start of more prayerful chapter in your marriage.
Don't do it because I asked you to but because you want to. Your choice....
One by one, the husbands present stood up.
Marx stood up too.
He walk to where his wife was.
The face of his wife was overwhelmed with love, she look on as her husband walked to her.
She almost stood up but he gave hand gestures at her to seated.
Marx reach where she sat, their eyes met.
He knelt down, he stared at her and then kissed her swollen left eye.
I am sorry, he said.
Can I pray with you, he asked?
She got up from her seat and knelt down too.
There, on the floor as the church service was still going on, husbands pray with their wives.
Marx prayed knelling with his wife.
They prayed for forgiveness, for Thanksgiving, for love, for renewal, for peace, for direction,.. For their marriage.
Marriage was healed.
