Before I had children, I would look at other parents who were giving their children soda and a pacifier and think, "Those are horrible parents. Don't they know what harm soda is and all the things that are wrong with pacifiers!" Then I had children. We have four. It was a lot harder than I thought it would be. When children are very young, you cannot reason with them. You cannot get through to them with logic.
I hope you continue on Steemit and share your experiences with your children. You do have children, right?
I love the concepts being presented by this an other posts to raise our children and never discipline them but what I am not seeing are examples of how to do that. Not once they are old enough to reason, between 4 and 6, but before that.
I am a strong opponent to child abuse. I grew up in a very unstable home. That was something I did not want and did not do in my own family but each of my children did receive a few spankings when they were very young. Once they were old enough to reason with, we discussed matters and consequences came into play.
I have a post on my oldest son, he is 21 now and I talk about homeschooling and letting children play a large role in their life. It is their life after all.
https://steemit.com/life/@craigwilliamz/how-to-raise-fantastic-children-part-1
Take things away. Speak to them in a calm, but firm tone. I had the severe misfortune of not realizing how awful spanking was and spanked my daughter twice when she was one because she kept taking things off the table and dropping them on the ground. Rather than adjust my living conditions to account for a small human who has no capacity to reason, I took the lazy route of instilling fear into her and dressing it up as consequentialism and discipline. I asked God for forgiveness, and when she's old enough I'm going to ask her for the same.
You're the adult. You're the one who should be capable of identifying issues and coming up with solutions. If you can't come up with a method to adjust the behavior or account for likely outcomes with your toddlers without resorting to violence, then I suggest taking a good, long look at yourself first. If not being able to keep an infant who's barely able to walk from ruining everything you own, maybe you need to consider a serious overhaul of both your lifestyle and your perspective. You have small children now. Deal with it.
If you can't reason with them, then the only thing spanking teaches is to associate you with pain in their minds. That's it. I dunno bout you, but that doesn't sound like healthy relationship building.
I am very happy to see the generation coming up is adopting this philosophy. I believe the results are going to be very fruitful. And I will have plenty of support once the grandchildren come along.
When our children were young, we were the outcasts for homeschooling. It is now being taken to the next level. There really is a big awakening happening and in all areas of life. With all the crazy out there, this is still a wonderful time to be alive!
I know! I am extremely excited to see what the future holds. Peaceful parenting isn't viewed with nearly the same derision as even I held it in. Despite the vociferous disapproval of the violent authoritarians who simply won't change, parents left and right (at least in my experience) have been reconsidering what it means to discipline kids without using force. Part of it I think stems from the idea that parents are supposed to be in control, and no spanking advocate I've ever spoken to will advocate spanking from a position of uncontrollable anger. The other part is people are genuinely starting to realize that kids without the ability to reason also lack the ability to understand why they're being spanked.
What a time to be alive, like you said! :D
Yes. Humanity has come this far. I think we are capable of not having violence in general with a few exeptions of course. Self defence for example.