14 years an ex-pat

It has gone fast, but it has been almost 14 years. Fourteen years living in a place I do not speak the language well and stick out like a sore thumb. This is home, but it is one of two.

It has been fourteen years since I left Australia to come to Finland for a one year working trip. See the world as they say. However, one thing led to another and here I am still. Married to a Finn with a baby daughter, a Finnish/Australian.

It hasn't always been easy. In fact, it never has been easy here. There are constant pressures like employment options, cultural problems and the fact that I am 14,655 km away from my other home. But all in all, I have survived although at times it looked unlikely. Maybe always the underdog, never a quitter.

Perhaps that is the Australian in me too.

It hasn't been easy being away from home either. My family is there, spread throughout the country and even with all of the technology, my 82 year old dad is in a home. We don't speak often. I have only been able to make it back twice in the fourteen years. It is all I could manage. Treasured moments all too brief.

My wife has never seen where I grew up, met the friends with which I shared many good times, and quite a few drinks. She wants to go and visit, but it is just not possible yet. 'Maybe soon', I keep saying. When soon is, I am unsure. There are priorities in life and an opportunity cost to every decision.

She says, what if we go there to work for a while, see how it goes, show our daughter her background, spend time with family. We can always come back. I run a small consultancy here, if I put it down for a few weeks, it will suffer heavily, a year and it is gone for good. I ask her what I would do there, an almost 40 year old starting over. What would she do?

For the first time in a long time though, I have some hope. I have a chance to work my way there, to have work when I arrive. I have the chance to connect with the right people, get my foot in the door perhaps or collaborate on something more.

From early on I saw Steemit as a way to both get some funds together and perhaps have an ongoing income to cover the holes, but it has much more potential than that.

The other day I connected with some Australians, @sirknight and @ausbitbank and become part of Team Australia, albeit from afar. My brother is here now also, @galenkp. I feel like something is building. I get to see a different view of home, after fourteen years, a lot has changed.

I feel part of something again, part of a community I thought lost to me but here it is again, found. Maybe it leads nowhere but at least it has given me some new sight, a potential path, a reason I can use to slowly remove barriers.

I would love to go home to visit more often, love to show my wife and daughter a part of me they have never seen. An environment changes a person and I have changed too. Much of it for the better, some maybe not. Maybe, I will even get a chance to live there again, at least for a while. I know my wife would at least be glad to never see a Finnish winter again.

Being here at Steemit has brought new possibilities, new energy, passions and has shown me again, there is still fight in this old dog. So again I will repeat it,like a mantra, each day I will continue to push my boundaries, remove the excuses that stop me from doing more of what I want, being more than what I currently think I am.

I think if there is a community that can help people through struggle, help people achieve their goals, give them a leg up when they need and a pat on the back when they are deserving it is the Steemit community.

In many ways, this is what is great about Australia too, at least the one I remember. It was a massive island community, full of thieves and scoundrels who would do all they can to help each other and would consistently decline the invitation from the authorities to do what they say.

I hope that hasn't changed.

Taraz
[ a Steemit original ]