Very good writing, mate! You have a real talent. I'm not sure what I enjoyed more- the LEGO MOC or the story!
I'm a huge fantasy fan and dabble in my own stories so I really appreciate the effort and imagination here. Just a tiny note for further improvement in your editing process- I noticed you swap from your main character being written about in the third person then two thirds through the story I started seeing lots of "me", "my" and "I". I think if you read it through again, you would have picked it up for sure.
Congratulations on a dazzling story speckled with colourful and imaginative descriptions.
Do you plan on fleshing out this storyline anymore? It really deserves more attention in the future.
Take care,
Nick
PS. Im very glad I found your work. Im keeping an eye out for your next story and I'll be suggesting upcoming posts on your Steemit Space for #curie consideration for resteeming. You deserve the extra exposure.
Thank you for your response :D Sorry for not getting back to you sooner. I do intend to continue the storyline. currently, I'm working out a schedule for posting my creations and story. I think I will try and post every fortnight. Also thanks for the suggestion. I'm terrible when it comes to perspective so in the next installment I will definitely reread to make sure every character is in the same person.
Thanks again
Jalan
No worries bud!
You're doing a terrific job. Big things ahead for you. :)
Nick