They were driving through the dense air of a swamp.
She had seen all of that before, in a movie.
By the beginning of the summer, they were exhausted. They still looked good from the outside, but they saw each other be nasty. This had put a certain anger between, as if they were both disappointed when the dream became biting reality.
There were days when she wouldn't talk to him at all. She was outside so much that it seemed intentional. It was causing a feeling of frustration for him, and he was yearning to be let go. Again, she felt that her hands are tied in regards to her destiny. She knew she would leave, he would leave.
And she wanted it to happen as soon as possible.
He had triggered in her something he didn’t want to deal with anymore. Her emotions were always heightened, it felt like living with a child. He was remembering moments when he was feeling like a boy pretending to be a man and succeeding. He longed for this state, yet he couldn’t make a move.
What was once a city that gave them a freedom none of them knew before, was now a prison in which they felt like parrots.
In the beginning of June, those first five or ten days that feel like an oversensitive dream fog, she was ready to make decisions. She sought the water, where she felt relaxed as her disruptive tendencies went for a swim. She didn’t know where he was. In fact, it’s quite possible her sudden possession made her forget his existence as much other than a concept. She hung out with a sweet friend on the lowest point in the city, and felt the beginning of sun season on her face as if someone suddenly turned on a strong neon bulb.
She traveled by bus, reading her last Agatha Christie novel that summer. It was end of October full moon. She had seen it rise in a different universe, and now she was standing in the middle of the night by the road, somewhere between what they call the reality and the dream, and she was smoking, she was watching the stars, she was feeling relaxed. She was excited.
That morning was foggy and the first sun she saw was a clear, sharp and white as original white, circle embedded behind the clouds.
She didn’t expect to want him that long.