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Love's Epic Journey: My Relationship with Quinn Eaker and Why I Escaped From the Garden of Eden
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I don’t even know where to begin to respond to this post, I just know that you must be in a lot of pain to have turned so dishonorably against the person you have made public and private claims for years to have been the most influential guiding light to help you without fail, even and especially in the extreme times when you were literally wanting to give up on life.
Opportunity has existed in every moment for you to express your feelings about anything, and every time you have been listened to and encouraged with full support. There has never been anything we have not been able to talk about, even the deepest and darkest secrets you’ve held on to for years. Even by your own admittance every time you have taken something to Quinn, he has provided solutions that helped you move past some of your trauma, grow, evolve and become a better person. Never once has Quinn betrayed your confidence about life traumas you have endured and shared with him. He has kept your secrets in strict confidence and has held space for you for years on end to heal, all the while feeding you, housing you, providing expansive skill upgrades and business opportunities. And on top of that, he hasn’t even made any claims or taken credit for all he has done for you - which is not the way of a true narcissist as you want to label him to be.
Your actions are in my opinion one of the greatest betrayals to the people who have loved and cared about you the most, especially Quinn. The are many recordings, interviews and even your own blogs about how he has continually helped you to take responsibility for yourself, which is the only reason you have actually evolved at all. Blame and pointing fingers at others was your norm, and falling back into that blame game will undoubtedly stop your evolutionary process. This is the pattern people do when feeling disempowered and when they can’t find it within themselves to address the things that are deep--they try to shift the focus of blame to someone else. You have been preaching responsibility for yourself and everyone else since you returned from Panama. You are no stranger to this concept.
How easy it is for you to pretend that all of the magnificence that has happened had to come down to sneaking out in the night, as if you were in danger in some way at the Garden of Eden. Preposterous! The greatest danger is the self and the darkness within that doesn’t get faced, while attempting to label and use others to incite drama. Announcing this is Part 1 of 3….stay tuned for the next episode...where we will talk about Quinn--because everyone likes talking about Quinn, rather its “good” or “bad”! Well that is one way to get attention and to divert the truth about your attempt to run away from yourself. Perhaps you’re still seeking Quinn’s attention in hopes that he may save your life again.
“Quinn Eaker is now much more of a lost soul, conflicted with intense personal trauma and much more in darkness than I ever was.” Interesting that if you were to really believe that was true (and as far as I know you’re the only one that believes that!), that you couldn’t find it within yourself to stand in his corner like he has done for you for years on end. He has never judged you for the trauma you have been through, the tantrums you have thrown, the bitchiness you have infused in the space, or a bazillion other things that compromised peace and harmony, but actually held you in his arms for hours, not publicly bashing you, trying to convince others about your perceived faults, or trying to label you and confine you to a box.
“I often amused him with my ability to match him and evolve.” To evolve I would agree with as from the depths from which you came has been great. To match him is ridiculous to say, as if you were in any way capable of matching him, you wouldn’t be blaming him, but instead standing up to recognize his divinity as he has done for you and hundreds more over a decade of service to others. When you match that, I’ll be super grateful to witness it.
Acting like your truth is the truth of others “who know him well, and have lived with him on a daily basis” is an extremely dishonorable portrayal of the man Quinn is. You can have whatever opinion you want, and change it even after years and years of personal testimony to the contrary, but attempting to make your experience our experience is not “the truth of this”.
I have no doubt Quinn will continue to be awesome regardless of how much resistance people have to life changing opportunities. No doubt he will still be holding space for your healing regardless of how dishonorably you treat him. He never even kicked the man, punched or stabbed him back after being stabbed 8 times which is a testament to his character. He will hold true to his values, overcome any obstacles, and evolve to an even greater man than he has already proven himself to be.
I would wish that instead of making public posts and ignoring all attempts for true communication and understanding, that you would step up to your evolved self and be real with the people who have proven to love and support you through thick and thin. You’re not in danger here, unless love hurts too much.
So very grateful that I have the option to move on and not get stuck in the past. The emotions of the past keep us stuck in the past.
Glad you do too because instigating and amplifying your trauma and blaming others for it is quite the suck. You've already put dozens of hours into your rants. Grateful you're ready to move on! Bless!
Looks like we can agree on that!
Since you're censoring the people holding you accountable on Facebook to the libel and defamation you have published in these blogs, will post the screen shots that speak to the truth here on the blockchain for all to see:
!
Note- This post was originally made on FB and was deleted just prior to me being blocked after accused of sharing traits with a pedophile because the author of this blog just can't handle the truth. Suck it up buttercup. You had to block me because you knew my response would blow your bullshit right out of the water
Also note - this comment is coming from the perspective of someone who has no physical or emotional relationship with Quinn - other than respect for who he is and what he does. Since apparently, people who do hold a deeper relationship don't hold credibility in LovOFF's eyes - except Inok of course - and well all know why that is...
I have made it a point this last year not to converse with damaged people on social media. I'm about to bend that rule. My time and energy are valuable.
First off, you write rather well. However, to call this a blog is an injustice. It should be filed on the $0.25 rack at the used book store under fiction.
You did an excellent job portraying Inok as some helpless, devoted mother of four. Well, let's hit a toofer on this one because this is who Inok really is. She is a self-entitled girl in a woman's body with abandonment issues and a princess complex. What kind of mother is she you ask? She is the kind of mother who could barely be bothered to pay attention to her children while she was constantly obsessing about when was the next party she could plan, how could she plan her ovulation scheduled to have yet another child when the reality was that she needed at least 2 people to help her care for the existing 3 all the time, and last but not least how she could win Quinn's "favor" with the least amount of work possible - if any - while still living in her fantasy land of being the best most enlightened mother ever. On two separate occasions, I witnessed her forcefully shove my heavy metal damaged son to the ground hard enough to where he would hit his head on the floor. It took every fiber of my being to keep from knocking her out cold. What kind of a sick "mother" would do that to a 4-year-old mentally slow child? Not only that but she belittled the children constantly, mine more than hers, but nonetheless she was never kind or caring towards them. When Quinn wasn't around to protect them, on two separate occasions she left BQ unsupervised long enough to where he locked himself in a boiling hot car in the middle of Texas summer for at least 45 min - an hour and I was the one that found him. I witness BQ take a full-on header off a countertop, off the serving table and last time almost 8 feet up off a ladder - face-first into a brick patio. Her almost letting QiQi drown was only the beginning of her inability to parent. After all, how can you care about anyone else when you are so consumed with yourself... I have been personally attacked by her twice when I called her out on her bullshit, and was screamed at with obscenities like a lunatic as she stomped up the stairs to pout that someone wasn't worshiping her. I watched her have full-on fights with Noki as if she herself were a 4-year-old trying to win a battle of wills. And once when QiQi got a few grease splatters to the chest and was sitting on the couch, alone, crying in pain, Inok sat on the other side of the room on her phone googling how to deal with burns. No sympathy, no comfort to Qiqi, I went over and sat with her to try and console her.
Go sell crazy somewhere else because we are all stocked up here. She is a shit mother and that maybe her best quality.
Now, I don't know you very well Love. I sure heard a lot about you before I ever met you, and came to find out we shared many similar life experiences. When I actually met you what I came to discover is that despite all your healing, you were still a very angry and bitter woman. So much so that I realized right then and there that our paths diverged because I was going to do whatever I needed to REALLY heal because I damn sure wasn't going to end up like that. I was SO grateful for the book you suggested to me, it really did help me understand why I had felt the way I did most of my life. It gave me a base. But QUINN gave me a future. He is the FIRST person I have ever encountered that really saw me and understood my potential. Not only that but he gave me opportunities to build on that and heal. I have said many times before how grateful for that I am and it is nothing but the truth. I was mentioned in your blog as one of the single mothers he tried to steal from - the truth about that situation is he and I BOTH reacted in excess to a misunderstanding that then turned into a situation. We worked it out. I can be a very stubborn person, and yet with communication and knowledge, we worked it out.
You could have done the same, but you CHOOSE not to. You choose to publicly hurt the people that have loved and cared for you the majority of your adult life. You use the word "escape" but the truth is you have come and gone from the GOE many times and whenever it suits you. If you really cared for any of the people there, especially Quinn you would have talked to him about him. Expressed your concerns and OFFERED SOLUTIONS. He could have listened to you or not - that doesn't matter, but the important part is that it would have been the honorable thing to do.
I read through these blogs and I see a victim looking to blame. It might as well have been written by Pat, or Inok, or pretty much anyone else that couldn't deal with changing and decided to leave GOE.
Worst of all it accomplishes nothing. You may have a few people jump on here to pat you on the back for being so courageous, but the people who matter and really know the dynamics of you and Quinn can spot a coward a mile away. I'm disappointed. Nothing you said are things that haven't been said about Quinn before, just not by someone who has known him a very large chunk of his life. I know exactly how deep that cuts, and you should too - my parents are still doing it. PLUS, I have lived with a TRUE sociopath and all the research in the world can't tell you what that was like, but I can. A real sociopath tries to drive the RV full of his family off a cliff because he didn't feel appreciated enough that day. A real sociopath when feeling rejected doses you and your house - containing their children in gasoline and tries to burn you alive. A real sociopath sings songs about how the best thing they ever did was "destroy your soul". The list goes on and on and on. I have seen nothing like this from Quinn, ever.
If you cared about him or the people at GOE you would take these posts down.
If you cared about YOURSELF you would take these posts down. You don't like GOE anymore - fine then go live your life and Bless. Anything less is disgusting.
So you had to block me just to stop me from blowing your bullshit up with an honest response, weak.
Quinn doesn’t give me power. Powerful people don’t need to be given anything. Quinn helped me remove my dysfunction and reminded me who the hell I am. That is my power, a concept you are obviously unfamiliar with.
If you knew ANYTHING about me you would know that I don’t lie. I have no reason to, plus the truth is always so much more entertaining. You and I did live at the GOE together during Eden Metamorphosis (weeks before and after as well). This is when I witnessed you being couch ridden for days with a sinus type infection - which you yourself admitted was because of something being off in your energy. You even admit to this being a pattern for you in your own words in those posts. At least 7 or 8 times during that period as well you said you were making dinner and when myself and my kids came in at night after a very busy day, we would find you had only cooked for you and a few people or didn’t even bother to make enough for everyone and were just like “oh well”. Which if that was your intention that is fine, but you shouldn’t make it sound like you are doing something for the community when you were clearly not. You absolutely had a hard stop time at night where you would retire to the living room with your laptop to “not be disturbed”. You were upset on more than one occasion that my son came and took an interest in you, because he is drawn to emotionally hurt people, and he was irritating you while I was wrapping packages.
I have an excellent memory and am always aware because I don’t get high or drink, ever. My recollection of the events are spot on while yours would be hazy at best if asked to recount what happened day to day during that time. As for comparing me to a pedophile - I’m not surprised because the is exactly what a victim would do when confronted to take responsibility for their actions. Compare away, but the fact is I am nothing like your father and you know that, more importantly I KNOW THAT and that is really all that matters.
Now let’s talk about your intention to “help” and not “hurt” with these posts. Fact of the matter is when I advised you in a private message about what a dishonorable thing you were doing and breaking a contract and all the ramifications that would come from it, your response was that you were in the perfect situation to do something like this because you have nothing to lose. You KNEW it would cause problems and you did it anyway. That is not love.
You want to go head to head, go ahead an unblock me. Point for point we can see who is about truth and honor and who is not.