I wrote a story for Steem Monsters recently that was disapproved of by one of my team members. The goal of this story was to highlight the struggle of a simple carpenter, and how he came to be locked away in the dungeons of Drayhk-Nahka. Sometimes things happen within a culture that are kept secret and go against the values of a society. This is one of those stories.
Senet Ahura: A Carpenter's Tale
by @rakkasan84
Senet was a young, hard working carpenter, admired by his peers. He had a beautiful young wife named Iseret whom was the light of his life. Every day he looked forward to seeing her beautiful smile after a hard days work.
One day on his way home from work, he saw two guards standing outside his home. They seemed to be watching or guarding the door. ”Well this is peculiar, isn’t it?” he thought. “I haven’t done anything wrong.”
He was coming home early today, because he wanted to surprise his wife by taking her out on the town that evening. Things had been a little shaky in their relationship lately and he wanted to show her how much he loved her.
Senet decided to sneak around to the back side of his house to see if he could figure out what was going on. There were no guards posted at the back door, and he couldn’t see any signs of a struggle or forced entry.
When he entered the back door quietly, he could hear some soft cries coming from his bedroom. Alarmed, he grabbed his carpentry hammer and rushed up the stairs. When he threw open the door to his bedroom, he found a young nobleman sprawled out over his wife on their bed.
At that moment, all he could see was red as he started swinging the hammer wildly. He lost his control in a fit of rage and bathed the bed, walls, and ceiling with blood.
The cries of the nobleman and his wife must have alerted the guards standing outside the front door, and they rushed up the stairs. The last thing Senet remembered was falling to the ground as the pommel of a guard’s sword swiftly cracked into the back of his skull.
“Bread! Water! Anything please!” he cried out from his cell. “I haven’t seen the light of day in ages and I’m starving in here!”
“Shut your filthy mouth and step away from the door!” a guard called from down the hall.
Senet Ahura skulked away from the door and searched the floor near his sleeping mat for some crumbs. The only decent meal he’d found this week was a rat that had wandered into his cell.
Moans and cries from the other prisoners could be heard throughout the day and night. He couldn’t tell the difference between the two down here in this dark hellhole.
Dim candlelight bathed the dreary halls in a soft glow, just enough for the guards to make their way around. The stench of unemptied chamber pots filled the air, stinging his nostrils.
His lips were dry and cracked from dehydration, and his mind raced with negative thoughts. “How did I come to be locked away in such a dreadful place?” he kept asking himself.
to be continued...
*(stock image courtesy of Dreamstime.com)
Nice start. Can't wait to read the rest of this.
Off to a good start for sure. Could use a bit of polish and some more vivid description, but definitely something to go on. If you ever want any assistance with your writing feel free to hit me up.
Thanks for your input, and welcome to Steemit.
Oh, damn - that's a great opener!
I can't wait to read more... will there be more???
Yes I plan on adding to this story over time, thanks for reading :)
That's fantastic! I can't wait!! 🖖
nice story
great story!