After successfully directing the future of Western civilization towards a cliff, hackers from the Kremlin have teamed up with Golos and successfully infiltrated the Steemit database. Here is a brief summary of what they found.
In keeping with our new Marketing VP @zurvanic's mantra, Steemit will now be all about transparency, transparency and transparency. Exactly what is transparent will of course remain shrouded in mystery until further announcement, but at least he was transparent about that.
linkThe new community liaison @andrarchy is working hard to promote Steem by enlisting the help of his father. I don't know about you, but I, for one, am very excited in the prospect of seeing Chuck Norris on Steemit.
linkWhen Steem Dollars was first conceived, the team struggled to come up with an acceptable corresponding ISO currency code. 'What do you think about STD?' asked @ned and the room fell silent. 'Well how about SMD instead?' but the rest of the team politely declined his amorous advances.
Recent dips in the entire crypto sector were due to Klan members selling off after they came to terms with a mix-up involving the word 'whitepaper' being constantly auto corrected to 'white power' on their devices.
Steem will no longer support languages other than braille.
Hardfork 19 will allow users who have powered up over 9000 Steem Power a small chance to evolve into a Super Steemian. Super Steemians have the ability to concentrate all their Ki into a single Super Upvote, which is extremely rewarding but depletes their entire Voting Power bar.
giphyDue to reports of flagging being abused, the flag icon will now float around the screen unpredictably making it more difficult to click. Missing the icon will still result in a loss of Voting Power. This feature will arrive in the next update and be known as Capture the Flag.
April Fools Everyone =)
If you enjoyed this article please Upvote, Resteem and Follow @trafalgar
Finally I will be able to become the Super Steemian I deserve to be.
I've heard of you, you're worse than Frieza! I'm going to have to follow you to keep an eye on you...
Lol, that single super vote would be awesome haha
haha ya you'll need to save up 5 days just to do it, but it'll be worth it!!!
Oh no! I almost spit out my coffee until I read a little deeper. :)
haha I hope you enjoyed my goofy jokes =)
Jokes? There are some quite useful ideas for the hardfork 19! ;)))
That Wack-A-Flag game sounds fun :)
haha ya these should be legitimate suggestions! lol
Haha. Funny :-)
Glad you enjoyed it =)
I am more interested in becoming Super Steemian Blue ;)
Great post btw! Already one of my favourites here.
haha thanks a lot =)
You have been visited by droomits
(see my post to get the reference) This was freaking hilarious! You were recommended to me...I forget by who now, I'll get back to you on that LOL. Good call to whoever it was ;)
That's great news, Trafalgar
Followed you, @trafalgar
Kindly review this very important message.
Very clever! One of the better April Fools Day posts I have read today, thanks!
Thank you for reading, glad you liked it =)
Haahaha, good one!
thank you =)
I almost fell from this, then I realized that it's April :)
You seem to constantly forget about the HardFork 19 feature which will turn each upvote into a medium sized slice of pepperoni pizza. All slices are frozen, obviously, and delivered to you in 13 equal weekly batches, after you successfully write 111 different comments to every post that starts with the letter "W", ends with the letter "b" and has exactly 18 commas. I think people have the right to know about this. After all, it's all about transparency, transparency and decentralized transparency.
haha nah I think that was just a rumor :)
Boo! scared yet! lol
Oh man... this is even worse than when I teamed up with the CIA to eliminate these steemit anarchists.