About eight days ago I admitted to those on steemit that I am an alcoholic. It was an extremely difficult thing for me to do, not only because it is embarrassing, but, as I suspected I did lose a few followers as a result of divulging this information.
Nevertheless, even though being an addict, truth has been a necessary driving force in my life-it has given me the strength to carry on even when fighting my demons albeit soaked in poisonous self medication.
A LITTLE BACKGROUND
I have beaten this addiction before but last year was an exceptionally bad one. Firstly I was diagnosed with lung disease, my shop and my source of income failed and had to be closed leaving me with a pile of debts and a very special relationship ended. I lost the love of my life. All of these things led me to relapse. At first it wasn't too bad but it got progressively worse and depression and anxiety permeated every fibre of my being. I had given up. No money, close to eviction from my house and a progressive deadly disease all added up in my mind to not caring about myself.
WHAT CHANGED
To begin with, nothing. As a matter of fact things got worse. My debts became and are now out of control. The doctor who had helped me in the first place left the practice. I had lost my ally. As a favour to a concerned friend I went back to the Doctors to try and get help. I had to see another doctor as mine had left and she was not helpful at all. I am not saying she was unkind but, as she did not know my case, she really offered no help at all. It was then that I realised that I had to do this on my own and devised a plan to do so.
RESULT
I am now six days sober. Six days free from my demon. It is still clawing at me, roaring and gnashing its teeth (the cravings, anxiety and depression are unrelenting) but I have managed to keep it at bay. I, not anyone else, have been fighting it and so far I am winning. It has not solved my other problems; my debts are getting worse, I am still grieving my lost relationship and I still have a degenerative disease but I can now face these problems with a clearer, more rational mind and with a spirit which is no longer chained and imprisoned. I can experience the real me again; someone who has been lost for so long.
CONCLUSION
Although addiction is exceptionally difficult to beat or resolve we all have it within us to do just this. We owe it to ourselves to regain our own equilibrium and identity. We must remember, no matter what else is going on in our lives, to love ourselves and let our spirit shine.
Although I said that I have lost a few followers as a result of my admission of alcoholism, I have had some very encouraging comments and support from a few people here on steemit and I want to thank those individuals tremendously namely @helena-malaja, @carface, @psionic-tremors and @bryandivisions. It would please me greatly if you gave them a look as well for they are amazing people.
Thank you steemit.
PEACE AND LOVE
Beating your demon might seem hard but its not impossible, wish you the best.....
Thank you for your support. Peace and love.
It isnt easy fighting addiction hopefully in the future when people finally realise that addiction is not something any human wants its a disease and needs to be treated that way people who are addicted need long term medical and psycological help its a disease that tricks the brain into believing you need the substance just like food when you are hungry.
I wish you all the strength in your struggle.
Stay strong
Thank you for your kind sentiments. I have followed you.
Thank you so much for sharing your story! You're seriously inspiring ME right now.
You're showing that no matter what is going on in your external world, you are in touch with your personal power and have found your source of light.
Much love @gurugnu I wish you the best! Keep going you've got this!
All I can say to you my friend is a massive thank you. We have both been a mirror for each other in the past but right now you are being my rock. You would never know how much that means to me but let let us just say...A HELL OF A LOT. Peace Bro.
Thank you my friend for mentioning me.
Your story makes me a little sad but also hopeful that you will find a way to deal with your problems and solve what can be solved without seeking distraction with the use of alcohol. Congratulations for being sober for 6 days now!! The demon gets smaller and smaller and the real you is coming back on surface ...that's beautiful. I truly wish you all the best ! ... keep fighting ..you will win...you won already :)
Thank you so much my friend....I really really mean that. Many blessings be upon you. Peace and Love.
Very interesting and thank you. How would I be able to utilise this elsewhere on steemit in order to reach more people? Thanks for your time. Peace.