On This Day

March 29, 2017

One year ago today, I heard the most heartbreaking news of my life.

I was sitting in front of you in a fast food chain. I was in cheerful aura but you were in your swollen eyes, deep breaths and heavy heart. I finished my meal having no clue of what you were going through. I thought it was just an ordinary bad day for you.

You held my hand. I clearly remember what happened that day. You placed my little palms on your cheeks. You sniffed and suddenly, your voice broke. I knew then that something was wrong.

You barely looked me straight in the eyes. I felt from within that sadness filled the atmosphere. With enough courage on my pocket, I began to ask why are you so sad. Then you began to cry. Tears flown as you held my hand tighter. You began kissing the top of my palm.

You told me you cannot say it with words. So you sent me a private message. We're next to each other yet we had to use our phones to connect our both worlds.

Your message made me cry. From that moment, I checked upon your face to see if you're just giving me some stupid joke. I saw in your eyes that your words were real and subsequently, I saw my life, my dreams shattered in an instant. I saw the family we planned of right before my eyes. I saw how my dream travels dissolved. I saw myself losing sanity.

Whenever I look back on those days when I had to deal with the thought of you leaving, it still breaks and continually breaks my heart.

You might read this one day and you might laugh at me because I have not yet recovered from those memories. It was really heartbreaking enough for me to accept it all. I am trying to move forward little by little. I am praying that for now, our paths will not cross again. I am trying to gather all the broken pieces and seeing you over and over again will just put my efforts into waste.

Wherever you may be, I hope you are somehow happy and I hope you take good care of yourself well.