We've all been in this situation thousands of times before:
You get to know someone new, and both of you quickly introduce themselves with their names.
Only moments later, you regret that you didn't listen to their name more closely... What was it again? Jackson? Jason? Jasper?
And then it's gone, we forgot the name and are often stuck in a conversation with that person while desperately trying to remember their name and avoid and awkward situation coming up.
But why do we actually forget other people's names quickly?
Well, there are several scientific answers to this question.
First of all, a name is completely unrelated to a person. So while you might remember someone's face, your brain can't remember the information about their name because there is no link between the face and the name at all!
Another important factor is that we are often focusing on introducing ourselves, so instead of listening to their name, our full attention is on what we're going to say next. Our Brains are often not that good at taking in information while spreading information at the same time, so that might be a reason why!
To avoid this dilemma in the first place, you should think about some tricks on how to remember people's names more easily!
This might also be very useful at Steemfest for anyone who's attending, because you won't only be making a lot of new connections that but you'll also need to remember both a real name and a username in a lot of the cases.
So what can you do to remember a name more easily?
Pay ATTENTION when they tell you their name first!
Often it's not even that hard for us to remember a name - it's just that we are so eager to meet a new person and start the small talk, that we don't really listen closely to the most important information - their name, which they'll only say quickly.
If you don't catch it exactly or realize you didn't listen closely, ask them to repeat it.
It's better to ask again now than much later or even the next time you meet them!
Use their name in the conversation!
Once you have focused on listening to their name and you got it, try using it in your conversation so that you don't forget it and that they feel like you've made an effort to remember their name.
You will remember the name much better if you've not only thought about it in your head, but actually said it out loud as well.
Also, it just sounds more **polite! **
Associate the name with something!
It's much easier for us to remember a name if we can visualize it in our head.
For example when meeting someone called Ted associate them with a Teddy bear, or when meeting someone called Mariah think of Mariah Carey.
Look at the name!
Let the person spell out the name for you. This can be especially useful for complicated or foreign names.
When you see the name written down, you can connect an image to the name you just learned and you will remember the name a lot easier.
Also, this will obviously avoid you spelling their name wrong later on!
Use Mnemonics!
This could be a rhyme like "Mike rides a Bike" or an alliteration like "Laura loves laughing".
It doesn't have to make a lot of sense - only by thinking about these Mnemonics and establishing the connection in your brain, you are already remembering it better!
Now if you actually did forget their name, your best shot will be to introduce someone you already know to them.
That way, they will say their name again too, and you can pay close attention and remember it!
Or maybe use one of these tricks:
And if you want to help someone else remembering your name next time - why don't you think of a saying, rhyme, association or alliteration that goes along with your name and tell it to them right away!
I bet they won't forget your name that easily!
- Instagram -
© Sirwinchester
Yes to all of the above suggestions . . . This has been a topic that I have spent a lot of time thinking about.
How many people have you met that say, "I can never remember names." To which I say, "What?" They repeat it and again I say "What?"
So, if you keep telling yourself that you can't remember names, that's exactly what your brain is going to do, not remember names. Change that up to "I remember names with ease."
Another thing is that most of us are not in the present moment. We are, like stated above, trying to think of what we will say next and our minds are busy chattering away and not listening to their name or what they are saying. Staying present and observing, and listening to what the other person is saying has helped me immensely. And then you don't have to fake it. Instead, your authenticity will shine through.
you're right - thinking negatively and being sure that you'll forget the name anyway doesn't help!
You should always try again with effort and be certain that you can learn it.
Great input, thanks!
it's like those people who always seem to have bad luck, it's like everybody is always against them and all bad things only happen to them. Last week I overheard a conversation in a train where somebody was saying she always has problems when she orders pies at a bakery. First all pies were very expensive, well don't by them if they are too expensive. Then she ordered 2, one for Saturday which needed to have the minions as theme and a cars pie for Sunday.
Well, guess what happens, the cars pie was delivered on Saturday and the minions pie was delivered Sunday :-)) I had a hard time not to laugh
I agree. This may be one of the most important points. We always get what we are in alignment with. If someone says they get the flu every year, they are likely to get the flu every year. I often hear people who experience certain ailments like arthritis say something like "my arthritis is back"--claiming that the arthritis belongs to them. Our minds are very powerful. It's amazing the things we can convince ourselves of. Leaving the window open for a change of mind is the perfect opportunity for upgrades to happen. Fun post. Thanks for the dialogue.
Bravo! excellent post. I work in a multinational company, the branch last working, had 300 internal and external 120 employees, was a must call them by name, to customize the relationship, my technique was associated with the names of actors or my family or friends , large recuero brought me his post. congratulations on this brilliant post
that's great to hear one of these methods is already working for you! awesome! and thank you for the feedback as well, appreciate it
Disclaimer: I am just a bot trying to be helpful.
ohh I'm so bad with names! this is exactly what I needed
I think the first tip is most important - just focus on the name and repeat it in your head a couple of times
this always happens to me.. right after the person tells me their name I've already forgotten :/
don't worry, this happens to a lot of people - just try really focusing on their name when they say it first!
connecting it to an image totally makes sense, I'll try it out!
I always try to associate a person with their job or hobby, that way I remember the name much easier!
that's a great tip as well!
any connection helps, a name alone is very hard to keep in mind!
I'll have to try some of these tips next time.
Will be very helpful at steemfest as well, like you said! (although I think people will wear stickers with their names anyway)
big conventions like steemfest where you meet lots of new people can be quite a challenge, but it can be a great exercise as well to keep paying close attention to everybody's names!
thanks for sharing your advice! interesting to read why humans have so much trouble with remembering names and how they can do it more easily. upped.
like stated above, since a name is completely random and has no connection to the person itself, it's quite hard for most people to remember a name right away..
haha, I had to do the "I'll introduce someone else so I can hear your name again" quite a few times already.
maybe I'lll be better off remembering the name right from the start!
haha, it's quite a good trick! but of course remembering the name from the start would be much easier!
honestly I have no shame anymore, I will ask someone for their name 2 or 3 times! I think if you're honest about it and tell it with a smile it's not even that bad. and nowadays most people are pretty bad with names
If you're being honest and friendly, I think the other person can only reply friendly as well!
I remember tons of events and the minutest giggle or if my friend has sneezed 10 years back but alas! can't remember a name most of the time! an nameonic handicap ?
I've always been terrible at remembering names ! I will follow your advice and try it. I find foreign names difficult to remember. I have a friend named Putu, but it's pronounced Pooroo with a twist in the tongue. Another Werner pronounced Verner. At least I remember them, but new people... no luck so far! Thank you for sharing this.
I used to be bad at remembering names. I would say thing like,"sorry I have trouble remembering peoples names". Now I have actually become good at remembering by not making the statement that I am "bad at remembering".
that's a good point! I hear others say that a lot too. Maybe it would be best if everyone would just drop that saying and start making an effort to focus on it
Yeah, It is a common phrase to give a person the security for their fear of forgetting a persons name. Yeah I think so, Its like fearing the worst to happen and creating it to happen at the same time
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Great post. This is an amazing topic. I also just started a new series about how to remember names: https://steemit.com/memory/@flauwy/how-to-remember-names-bob-ross