I think compatibility can be achieved during the relationship if both partners want it, perhaps except some really extreme cases. I'm not advocating delaying sex until married, but I do think that in pretty much every case sexual compatibility is a goal partners can work towards together and achieve it.
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I think sex is not the right way to start a serious relationship but does need to come into the fold at some point prior to a marriage commitment.
This I think is best left to the partners themselves.