turning a reaction to 'disrespect towards others' into a realization that the pattern starts with self. and respecting self

as i come out of a depressive state, i am presented with opportunities to reconnect with people-at-large. as my psychiatrist mentioned, there will be times when i retreat back into depression and it’s important for me to seize these opportunities.

tonight i was presented with an opportunity to break a disrespectful habit i have of smoking tobacco in my house. i have been smoking tobacco with marijuana in the house.

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to smoke tobacco in the house.
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continue to smoke tobacco in the house despite realizing it was disrespectful to the property owner
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize, see and understand that smoking tobacco in the house is also disrespectful to myself.
i forgive myself for not allowing myself to realize the smoking tobacco is disrespectful to myself

Thus, I flag the behavioral pattern, within the principle of bringing it back to self, as smoking tobacco.

When and as I see myself smoking tobacco, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize and understand that smoking tobacco is disrespectful to self and thus, I commit myself to no more smoking tobacco. When and as I see myself reacting emotionally or lost in feelings about being disrespectful to others for smoking tobacco in the house, I stop and I breathe. I see, and realize, that such emotions and thoughts and reaction to smoking in the house are ultimately stemming from my smoking tobacco as part of a self-destructive pattern. I commit myself to no more smoking tobacco.