Actually, I am not able to get the right title for this post. But as you go through my post you will understand what I want to communicate.
This is something very personal that I want to share, as I always say things that I cannot speak out I write in my blogs and express my feelings.
It is about my Son and his fiancée. They have been going around since last 7 years and she has become a part of our family. For me she is like my second child, my daughter. My hubby is very attached with her, as he always wanted one daughter and since we had a Son, he takes her as our daughter.
Since the last few months both my Son and her have been having some differences. And then finally they have decided to be apart. This is a very big emotional moment for us, it is just not about their relationship. Me and my hubby are heavily invested with our emotions in their relationship. I am still ok and I take things very practically but my hubby is not like that. He is very sensitive when it comes to relationship. Anyways that's a different story and just setting the background to take this further.
For me, I will never give up on both of them. I know things have gone wrong between them but I have this hope that things will be fine soon. Since she is also like my daughter, I have not disconnected from her and we keep having our conversations. Today morning me and Bhavya had a long conversation on relationships and just about general life. She is very spiritual and she is learning healing also, that strongly bonds us.
I asked her what is it that separates my Son and her, and she said there are many things, and she is not able to forget certain actions and move forward. Now I know what these actions are. Both of them have fallen out of their relation with someone else and then again come together. And both of them are not able to forgive each other for that. Yes, I know that is something intense, but I still believe that there is nothing in life that you cannot forgive. We all make mistakes, especially in relations, but we need to learn lessons from that and grow. We cannot be stuck with our mistakes for life. If there is true, unconditional love we can always work it out then be it whatever the situation is.
She says she still loves him, but not sure what their future is. My only question to her is, that she should imagine herself with some other person and will she be happy in that. If yes, she should move forward, else she should think over their decision.
We all make mistakes in our youth age right, and not only in our youth, we keep making mistakes all our lives, but we should not make hard decisions on that which later on we may repent for. We need to sometime keep our emotions on one side and be a little rationale as to why those mistakes have happened in the first place.
Life brings us through many such circumstances where we feel that no I cannot go any further on this path. If that brings happiness to you, it is fine, we should change our paths, but, if that leaves us restless than that path is for us and we just need to make some adjustments on that path to start again moving forward.
A lot of people do not agree with how I think, because my only philosophy in life is to not get stuck at any point. To move forward and that's why sometimes people find me very cold and sometimes they find me very emotional.
In their case yes, I am emotional and I want to give them all that perspective to save their relation. After that also if they fall apart then I will willingly accept it, but I do not want them to fall apart for some mistakes. Unconditional Love from each other is not something that you find in every couple, where you can hold each other in their good times, bad times, mistakes or whatever.
Me and my hubby got married at a very young age, I was 21 and he was 24 and we made our share of mistakes also. We made grave mistakes and those reasons were enough to end our marriage but whenever we would think of ending, we would realize that be it whatever we loved each other and we could not imagine our life without each other, and that love cruised us through our 26 years of married life. No relation is perfect and no one is perfect, we have our flaws, but the beauty in it is to accept each other's flaws and harmonize the relation. What do you think about this?
I will keep counselling both of them, and I am not hopeful, but I am sure they will again come together because their love is true for each other.
Thank you for visiting my blog. 👼🏻👼🏻💖💖🌹🌺🌸
|
|
|
|
MINDFUL LIFE is a Natural Medicine project which supports meditators on HIVE
|
Join The Best Natural Health Community on Hive
|
|
hi dear @nainaztengra; I hope you are doing good. Just wanted to check things are ok at your end. Its been a long time didn't see a post from you. take care best regards
Dear @gungunkrishu, thank you for checking on me. I am perfectly fine. It's just that somethings happened here and I wanted my space to get clear in my head, so took a short break and some time to myself. Hope you and your family are all doing fine.
Oh Nainez thatust be so hard on you all. I love my nearly daughter in law and would find it hard to lose her. I agree that in a marriage you need to struggle through the hard times as it is so much more rewarding. Forgiveness is everything. I hope they find a way through.
Congratulations @nainaztengra!
You raised your level and are now a Dolphin!
Check out the last post from @hivebuzz:
Well, they might get back together if fated to be with one another. Sometimes, it can also be after they are married to other people, had kids, or when their hair turns grey. Destiny is too unpredictable!
I have known such people in my life. Absolutely destiny is very unpredictable and you do not know when you will cross paths with people at what stage of life. I believe it is just the way Universe puts you across through people at the right time and right place.
😴My dear Nainaz..I'm so sorry to know your sons relationships have come to the end for now. I remember their happy photos, and they look fine together. 7 years is a great term, and I do understand you when you say you take her as your daughter. I had the same situation. My ex-relationships (before my marriage) went to the end after 5 years. It is a long term too. We had strong love, we planned to be together forever, I dreamed about kids, marriage, he was very close to my parents, they took him as their son. Then something went wrong, I made mistakes, he made them too, and love couldn't overcome all this sh*t, and I left him. Soon I started relationships with another man who was ready to get all stars for me - he is my hubby now. Breaking down 5-years relationships was very hard. Very very hard. And I was surprised that it was hard for my parents too. They took him as their son, and they couldn't forget him long after it. We don't comminucate with him for many years, but my parents still are interested in his life, they are glad to hear some news about him, and my Mom even regrets she didn't try to unite us. Though it would be wrong, because it had to be our decision, not hers. So I do understand your pain and worries. 7 years is a long term for their age, and they both are lost now. It seems to them they can't move on together, but it's extremely hard to start a new life and new love too. They are native souls already, they went together a great piece of their lives. But all relatinships can have critical times, a crisis, and 7 years is one of them by the way. It's normal. It's time to evaluate what they had, and whether they are ready to move on separately. They just need time. Your question to her was right, and she must think about it. They both must. Now it seems to them they can't live with mistakes they both made, but time is the best advisor. Their hearts will promt them the right decision, they just need to FEEL, not to THINK. Don't worry, my dear, your son must be wise, like his Mom is, he is just too young, but still wise, and his girl is the same, I think, if you love her so much, so just leave the situation for now, I am sure the Universe will show the right way😍
Ohh my dear, I feel very emotional reading your comment. I can understand it must have been so very difficult for you to move on but then you had to because life stops for no one, and as you rightly said it's a matter of time and gradually what is meant for both of them will happen. At this point of time I am not making any decisions, I am just wanting to give them a good perspective so that they can make their right decisions and not be in any emotional turmoil after making their decisions. The good thing is as of now both of them are still open to consider things but yes they need space for now to think through and that is very justified. True, after all they have to make their final decisions and I am not going to influence them in that. I am feeling good reading your comment. Anyways you know these days Hive also has been giving me a emotional drain, and hence I am a little cut off. Thank you for the comfort.
Not cool at all indeed as you are on the sidelines of their decisions but still are involved. A challenging situation for sure. It is beautiful though that you truly got to see her as an additional daughter. Who knows where their story will go. They seem like reasonable discussions and they will figure out their paths. But yeah...sucked to see that they are hurt both
Yes, no idea where the story will go, all I want to do is give good energy to their relation and then leave it to the destiny to make it work or not work whatever is in their best interest. It is difficult to control emotions in a strained relationship but then we need to live with it
I am sorry you are going through such things.
But relationship are always tricky. It never follows a linear path. I had my shares of failed relationship before I found the match. And the only thing I learned so far is there is no such thing as perfect match. But there is something called working towards a common goal.
❤️☮️
A perfect partner is a surely a fantasy, if that's the expectation one sets then disappointments are for sure. I am glad you found your match which you believe is right for you. True, these are the learnings until we come to where we belong.
I totally agree with this