"There is no remedy for love but to love more" - Henry David Thoreau
The first day I asked her to marry me was one of the greatest moments of my life. Face glittering with the warmest happiness ever, tensed nerves released, and the long-awaiting silence broken. I couldn’t hold it any longer, I told her how much I love her and I want her to be my wife.
No too much story! It’s a brief poem of love jogging out of my innermost heart.
She asked me to give her some time to look into my proposal. Or what do you expect?
Wait a minute! I can’t forget this striking point. She asked me a thought-provoking question that same day. For the first time since we have been friends, she told a secret about herself. She then turned to me and asked me a decisive question: “will you still marry me?” I did not know when I echoed yes. I really appreciated that level of sincerity, trying to help me see who she is, not who I think she is. That is called sincerity or openness. I got the message. My love-stricken heart longed more for her. “How can she be this sincere?” I wondered. It was clear from that point that we can really build our relationship on a safe foundation, not on deceptive foundation.
Do not try to pretend to be who you are not. Fake life cannot take your relationship far. Be plain. Do not build your relationship on lies. Must you say everything about you the first day as a lady? No! It is not a must that you must say anything the first day when the guy makes his intention known. I am just fortunate that my wife was so sincere that she couldn’t even keep what she told me any longer that first day.
At what point can you tell the guy something about your past?
At the point that you know he is mature enough to hear it. Depending on how sensitive the secret is, you may need to look for the right time and the right avenue to let him know.
Wait! The guy too is not exonerated. He too could have some past secrets to tell.
From both sides, do not try to keep any secret away from each other. If he/she discovers later through another means, it could be very taunting and destructive. If you already have a baby out of wedlock as a lady, let the guy know before he takes you to the altar. The same thing goes for the guy too. No stone should be left unturned. The earlier you let the secret out, the safer for you; only look for the best avenue to do that. Some highly sensitive cases may require prior counseling. Be wise!
While wasting the guy’s precious time if you know you are not ready to marry him? How long will you keep him on hold? Do you think he will see you as being cheap if you’ve responded to his proposal on time? Remember, this is a real life matter you are dealing with, not a candle crust game!
Just exactly one week after my proposal, my wife gave her yes response. To be precise, 2nd of February, 2006. Suddenly, everything all around me looked bright and beautiful. It was a remarkable day that I can never forget in a haste. It’s more that winning a jackpot. I just won a dearest love. I was so excited, so elated.
At last, I won! We won.
That was the beginning of our love story.
To be continued...
Thanks for reading