How to distinguish between the personal interests of the family?

in #relationship8 years ago

Relations are very important to respect the personal interests of the partners, each other's boundaries and give each other freedom. In theory, everyone knows this, but in practice it is somehow difficult to implement. Not until a couple of unmarried somehow goes out to follow the unwritten rules of the relationship, but when the passport stamp appears more relaxation and forgets what it really is that simple, but very important.

For example, if your man suddenly discovered a passion for parachuting sport - whether it be a personal interest or family? If dancing injury and he will be forced to lie all the time, like a bedridden? Whether and when it will be able to take care of myself? Is that you'll have to do?

The family relationship is always difficult to speak. It is not only the newlyweds dance perfectly mowed meadow and posturing before the camera lens on holiday. This is also a great responsibility for one another, for children, for the future, no matter how trivial it may sound. When a man desperately requires that no one interfere in certain areas of his life, or at least he generally thinks about other people's interests, or only about your own?

3 things which should not be mixed with the personal interests of the family:

Self search. Imagine the following situation: a good girl, say the name Agnes falls in love engage the interested fashion, a stylish young man working in a fairly good job. After a year they are born twins. But suddenly he stops to take care of their appearance and losing their jobs. Agne has gone on maternity leave, feeling exhausted after countless sleepless nights and hard work 24 hours care of the twins. Her husband begins to look for a new source of income. He does not agree to go to a job that pays less than he deems worthy. He is not suitable for the work, which is not seen his creativity and leadership qualities. And caring for twins he somehow managed to avoid it. Woman trying to convince the man that he kind of Special search of temporary work until you find a better one. However, he does not agree to trample their ambitions and says: "I cease to respect yourself, if you go to load transportation or to drive a taxi car! This is my life and career ". After two years of Agne husband decides to leave, The reason that his career ambition to empty it impossible to live together. Man rained on her, calls her materialistic bitch, do not care which neither he nor his career.

Health. Another story is sad, because there a lot of deaths. It all started with the traditional: he was older than her, and she - sweet and beautiful girl. Then she became pregnant. He wanted to son, it was the same. He was extremely brutal, had a good job, men's interests and countless buddy. And how many of these men really took care of their health, avoid annual inspections. After all, it's not how fragile virgin or old lady, that would visit the clinic. He is convinced that the recovery will be successful and the same, that just do not go to the doctors. Husband fever and began to hurt a tooth, but he sat down in the car and drove to work. In the evening, half of his face was horribly swollen, and the temperature is elevated further. Woman tried to convince driven to the hospital, but the man refused, but still went to buy painkillers. After a few days of medication did not help anymore. Finally, he was in a hospital operating room. But it was too late. One day a woman woke up alone - the man was dead. For stress and nerves suffered a miscarriage.

Past. Present belongs to both of you, but you had a different past. For example, sometimes the relationship of the past may start to undermine the existing relationship. One woman married a great guy. Everything would be fine, but they still try to turn a former boyfriend's lover. It is therefore necessary to dispel the shadows of the past that they are not harmful to frighten the couple's relationship.

And where is the freedom? Everywhere! When a person can not feel free, being with each other, what's the point in general to continue the relationship? If you have a personal interest or ignore the second half of the welfare of the family, maybe it's time to change or withdraw? What kind of lipstick you buy is your personal choice, but only if you do not spend the last money for the family. Your family does not have to starve, however, that you can buy velvety smooth and perfectly suitable for you to color lipstick. Your husband has the right to be with friends, if it does not mean that you are already on the third day you can not sleep on children and on women's shoulders falls the entire responsibility for the way of life. After the wedding, "I" becomes "we", so the two of you is the most important interests. And personal interests should make an effort to adapt to the family.