I have indeed thought about this, and I am currently reading your post (with an open mind) however my stance as of yet is that women choose non-STEM fields, from my observation of choices women I have seen make while growing up. We are living in an age and society where we have the most opportunity and support that there has ever been. I have never experienced, nor observed any girl being encouraged to stay away from STEM fields, and although men can be surprised when women are interested in those fields that does not mean that they don't think its right, or they are against it or even that they have been socialised to have those views. It's just uncommon for women to have those interests.
Now for those who do, I think its amazing, I applaud female mechanics and engineers, its super badass, I wish my interests and skills sets lay in those fields because that would be pretty cool.
But for me, as is the case with a lot of women, I just prefer the nurturing side, to me the idea of being a housewife, looking after my husband, raising children is utterly appealing. Not because society says so, trust me, I am the stubborn type to do the opposite of what someone suggests just to be independent, but because of my biological disposition, because of the way I was created, the maternal instinct within me. and I believe that this is the same for most women.
Could there be more encouragement of women in STEM fields? Of course and that would be great. But is society pushing us into fitting certain moulds? No I don't think so.
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Yes, you may have never seen a girl being encouraged to stay away from STEM but wouldn't you agree that they aren't encouraged to go into STEM either? That's one of the points in my article.
You did mention you're perfectly happy with being in a nurturing field but that's not all girls. Don't you think that there are women out there that may be interested in building their own computer from scratch had someone shown them how it's done? Because this is what happens to young boys. There's family members and friends who are into these things which makes them explore and ultimately decide whether or no they want to pursue a career in STEM. I was never encouraged to be in Tech. I was in Pre-Med and that was a mix of both family suggestions and eventually, I found it interesting. Until I took a programming class and here I am in CS instead of working to get into medical school. I explored my options and realized what I want to do as a career. Not very many girls are given that option/opportunity is what I'm saying. Even in developed countries, there's less motivation for girls to go in Tech. This is the reason why it's uncommon for girls to be in Tech and Engineering.
Yes, they don't think it's wrong to see a girl in a Java programming class. What my article is trying to show is the surprise aspect of it. If they are surprised, there's more ways to show then just REALLY!?! YOU'RE in CS!? You know, maybe say "Oh that's awesome. We don't see a lot of girls in our classes so it's cool that there's more girls getting into CS and Engineering."
I don't think anyone is encouraged into any field due to their gender. If someone notices you have a skill in an area then they will encourage you to pursue it.
Of course I think there are girls interested in it, I'm sure I said that in my reply. I think its great when they do. And I celebrate our society which makes it possible. Obviously we can always improve and do better as a society, but I think many people should acknowledge how far we have come as well.
I'm sorry that you didn't receive that encouragement, I suppose there may always be a cultural difference between the UK and America but over here I have observed nothing but encouragement for everyone pursuing anything.
And to your point about the boys reactions. I think men and women are wired differently, and they wouldn't respond like that because that's not the way they think. I'd argue that their "REALLY? YOU'RE in CS?" is their way of saying, "wow that's cool and unusual, good on you."
Well, I'm from South Asia, originally and now live in the US. Luckily, there's more programs aimed to get women in Tech these days. I'm happy with this progress.
Obviously, we've lived through and seen different kinds of lifestyles. All I have to say is we can't let our personal experiences of being encouraged or not, keep us from seeing that there actually may be a good reason why we don't see gender balance in work place.
Just like how saying certain words and attacking certain groups of people isn't acceptable anymore (but has been for decades in some cases), we all should start thinking about the things we say; "What!? YOU are in CS!?" comes off very differently and has a different connotation than "wow that's cool and unusual, good on you."
I doubt I or anyone can ever convince you against what you believe. That's why we have education systems, books, and an ocean of knowledge on the internet to draw our own conclusions from. I'm glad we could talk about this briefly as adults! Wish you all the best at school. :)
I highly agree, this was a very pleasant discourse. I enjoyed the conversation :)