The internet is full of numerous abstract and generalized self-help tips on how to increase our happiness. Today, I want to present you with three quick practices that have really helped me relax, make positive changes, and enjoy life.
First one is forgiveness. If we hold (or even worse, feed) negative feelings inside us, we will hardly have a positive attitude towards life. We tend to believe that some things are unforgivable. How does this help us? If we hate someone, who takes the damage from it? Since hate usually remains inside the one who hates (today, you cannot simply take a club and smash someone’s head like you could a couple of millennia ago) and the hated person often doesn’t even know about it or doesn’t care about it, the one hates is actually the one that gets hurt from his/her hate towards someone else. Thus, forgive and move on - not for someone else’s sake, but for your own sake! Try thinking about someone you hate (or are angry with) for a long time and forgive him/her. It is important to note that you can also forgive yourself for some past mistakes that you’ve made, or for some of your imperfections that you have a hard time accepting.
Now that you’ve (hopefully) emptied some of the negativity inside you, let’s do a simple thing to fill you with some positivity. Try thinking about and listing the things that you are grateful for – it can be your romantic partner, your good friend, your good health, your pretty eyes, the fulfilling hobby that you’ve discovered, the cozy home you’re living in, a good book that you’ve read. We all have a lot of things that we can be grateful for, we just need to remind ourselves about them from time to time. This is a great practice since it moves our focus from the negative to the positive stuff around us.
Finally, don’t be afraid to make changes in your life. You are scared of talking to that boy/girl that you like? You are scared of leaving that annoying job of yours and finding a better one or becoming a freelancer? You are afraid of joining a new interesting group activity and making new friends? Identify one thing that you would like to do but you choose not to because of fear and ask yourself: what is the worst thing that can happen if you do it? And how will you feel for the rest of your life if you don’t change things that you don’t like and/or don’t try things that you do like? Just do it, and if you fail miserably, remember that: “FAIL” means “First Attempt In Learning” and “NO” means “Next Opportunity”
I would like to conclude this article by quoting two interesting Steemians:
What are we? Kindness, compassion, love, empathy, strength, friendship.
It is in the ordinary where true beauty lays, it is the one leaf clinging to the branch while all others have fallen to the ground, it is the swirl of paint on the palette where two colours work in harmony on their way to become one, it is the drop of coffee that filters slowly into the milk.
If you liked this post, then you would probably also like my recent article: U.S. scientists have discovered a formula for the elixir of life!
Have a wonderful day, week, and life!
Wisdom written with clarity.
Thank you, @danielhime! : )
"Negativity kills the happiness" - that's a golden rule @lifenbeauty. You couldn't explain this well enough in this post you have here. We kill the negativity instead. :-D "Yepp, that's what we do!" Happiness is the opposite of revenge. Also, time heals everything. Cheers to life and beauty. :')
Yes, I believe that forgiveness is the way to kill negativity and gratitude a way to build positivity. Once we manage to do that, we are ready for some really great new things in our lives. Cheers, @hungryhustle! :)
Nice to meet you, @lifenbeauty! So VALUABLE tips you have shared :) I personally find #1 most crucial. For an analogy, we are like programmed computers that over time get viruses from other people, unhealthy food, toxic environment. Only we ourselves can choose to DELETE viruses from our minds, bodies and souls by honestly admitting we have it and then saying: "I don't want it, it doesn't belong to me. I want to release it." Release means delete. I'm doing it myself and it WORKS! Warning: the side effect of releasing viruses is JOY. :)))
Thanks to YOU, Joe Dispenza's book "Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself" and Gregg Braden's video series on Gaia.com
Followed, upvoted and resteemed! You deserve it :) Looking forward for more!
Nice to meet you too, @wild-forest!
I agree that #1 is crucial - without first releasing negativity through forgiveness, we can hardly fill ourselves with positivity through gratefulness or make big positive changes in our lives.
I love your analogy with computer viruses and the witty side effect warning. I see that we like some similar topics, your latest diamond thought from a bar is really nice, I've upvoted it and followed you too.
Thank you for the meaningful comment, I'm looking forward to more discussions. 😊
I'd say that people should also try mindfulness meditation. It helps with controlling your thoughts and emotions and indirectly, has a strong influence on your happiness. Thanks for sharing!
Absolutely! Everything I've written in the article is quite connected to mindfulness and hardly achievable without it. For those unfamiliar with meditation, a guided one is a good start, followed by the meditations focused on breathing. Thank you for the addition to my thoughts, @dr-ps. : )
"Try thinking about and listing the things that you are grateful for" - I just did and it put a smile on my face. It's kinda obvious, but I never thought about it. Thanks for writing this... :)
Yes, sometimes we miss the obvious ways to happiness.
Thank you for reading, Okky. 😊
Good one, but even better question to ask oneself is, what's standing in my way of realizing happiness? What belief or what story did I make up that holds me away from realizing pleasure that is life?
I agree! I guess that you can understand the pic below. : )
Hahaha, yes!! How come you know croatian??
We're neighbors - I'm from Belgrade. : )
Zakoon :D Imam dosta familije u Srbiji inace :)
It took me a long time to learn that forgiveness does not mean that you condone what happened or that you now like that person or want anything to do with them. It means that you no longer put a meaning on it and no longer allow those thoughts to control your life.
Let go and let god deal with it or courts and solicitors work well too ;)
Thank you for the meaningful comment, @xeniaioannou! 😊
I agree with you 100% that forgiveness is much more about letting go then about liking the person again. It's more our own internal process than something that has to do with others. Except if we use courts and solicitors. 😄
Wonderful Pos! @lifenbeauty forgiveness frees us and opens many doors, fear paralyzes us, negativity likewise closes us to ourselves. Thanks for this content. This morning I was destined to read this post and especially the fear part. Namaste!
Thank you, @evesweetpassion! Let's open our doors and enjoy a positive life. Namaste! 😊
Wow .. if thanks for inspiring! I will make my trip as I had planned. @lifenbeauty
This is one of the most beautiful posts I'm reading this week...
When people hear the word 'forgiveness' most of the times, they are quick to think that when they forgive, they will forget...
But that's not true! Because when you forgive, a part of your brain wasn't removed! The memory didn't go!!
This is what happens, the forgiver has only decided to let go of the pains and effects the offence used to have on her. She has decided to interpret the event differently, and in a more empowering way. She has decided to change her bodily and emotional response to the hurt.
Therefore, forgiveness is as much a DECISION as much as it is an EMOTION.
@lifenbeauty, thanks for your words. If followed, can of course equal a HAPPY LIFE!
I agree with you. Forgiveness is much more about letting go then about forgetting the event or liking the person again. It's more our own internal process than something that has to do with others.
I love how you explained that forgiveness is a way to change bodily and emotional response to the hurt in an empowering way.
Thank you, @alexoyebade! 😊
You're welcome. I look forward to more of your posts.
I'm was once a victim of hate and so I can so much relate to the unforgiveness part. There is nothing as bad as bearing grudges towards another and the funny thing they don't get affected by the grudges but you. When you are clouded with hate and so much unforgiveness you are likely to get provoke easily, angry at any slightest chance. No matter what a person or people have done to us letting go is the best, they may not be sorry or ask for forgiveness but you just had to forgive and set your self free for your own happiness
Lovely write up @lifenbeauty
Exactly, "clouded" is an excellent description of what hate does to our mind! When we are clouded with hate, it mostly affects us and those around us who do feel our negativity, even if the hate is aimed at someone else. Thus, we need to let go of it for our sake, as you pointed our, but also for the sake of good people around us, which your comment helped me realize. Thank you, @prechyrukky! 😊
It's interesting, indeed a simple, concrete and applicable tips to increase your happiness. To let go every hurts, face ur fear and ensure no regrets is in our heart. Thumbs up
Thank you, @sammee. : )
Uwc
My favorite part of this post is being grateful. Being grateful and voicing my gratefulness not only makes me feel happier, it releases anxiety. When I'm feeling anxious I just pray for the people I love and tell God how grateful I am for them and whatever I was anxious about drifts away. Great post!
Thank you, I'm really glad you like it. It think that what works better depends on what we hold inside us at the moment, those of us who hold much hate and anger would benefit most from forgiveness, while those of us who are sad or anxious would benefit most from gratefulness. : )
Hi @lifenbeauty. Thank you for sharing. Gladly i found this on steemit. Will resteem this one! Wish you all the best.
Hi @juliet92, thank you for reading and resteeming, I'm glad you like it.
I see that you're new on Steemit, welcome and good luck! 😊
Happiness is Must important role in life
Forgiveness + Gratitude + focused action = Awesomeness
Pretty much, well-said. 😊
Plzz upvote...
there are other people where their happiness does not depend on forgiveness, but on the country or the environment that surrounds them. I also maintain as a philosophy of life that our goal is to love unconditionally, forgive and know ourselves as individuals
I agree with you - although without first releasing negativity through forgiveness we can hardly fill ourselves with positivity, some people don't hold any grudges and thus have nothing special to forgive.
Thank you for your work 🙏
Thank you for reading. : )