I am very interested in Psychology. Thank you for this post.
I'd love to answer your questions.
I agree that it is not the situation but the meaning attached to it that causes emotional responses. I am fond of reflecting about my past actions and behaviors and based on my personal experience, whenever something makes me sad, it is actually the past experiences that affects me greater than the present situation. So therefore, the meaning I associated with the present situation is what actually caused my sadness.
For your second question, I actually experienced doing both the positive and negative strategies. I used to be a very negative person and I was so fond of brooding over my negative feelings, thus, making it worse rather than better. But now, I have learned to be more positive and try to resort to strategies that alleviate difficult feelings. Although it doesn't make it go away or solve it, it somehow lessens the burden and enables me to have more strength to face the actual problem.
Hello @annepage. Thank you so much for this beautiful reply!
May I ask you a question? You said you have learnt to be more positive and have abandoned your negativity. So, could you be so kind as to share with us how you achieved that change in mindset? :)
All the best to you!
Hi @abigail-dantes. Good day! :)
To tell you honestly, it was an arduous fight against the comfort of the negative feelings pattern. I said comfort because somehow, sadness for me, had a certain sense of familiarity. We tend to get comfortable with something we've been used to, right? That's why I had unconsciously embraced sadness, simply because it's easier for me... because it's familiar.
What inspired me to change? It's the people who love me. I have a lot of friends actually (real ones). And they really care for me. They have noticed that I was no longer the cheerful person they used to know, so they tried their best to get me out of my unhealthy pattern. Seeing how they put effort to cheer me up, is what inspired me to change.
It really took a long time and so much effort to wake me up. But being with the right people, any depression could be solved. One needs to have an outer force to help him break the pattern. Right now, whenever I start to have negative feelings, I look for the people who helped me break my pattern. Sometimes, all you need is someone who really understands you. :)
Thank you so much for this opportunity to discuss with you something I am so passionate about! :)
Hi @annepage :)
I was just discussing this exactly point with someone else not long ago. There are so many cases in which depressive states could be reversed if only the person had a supportive network of loving, caring people. I, myself, believe that Mr. B would not have got to the state he did if he had his wife, children and parents with him. The feeling of rejection played a huge role in worsening his mood disorder. I am SO pleased to hear you are one of the few privileged who not only have this sort of support, but also are aware of it!
The first part of your comment reminds me very much of mindfulness, which is not a therapeutic approach per se; but, that is being increasingly adopted by therapists nowadays. It draws its philosophy from Buddhism; and, therefore, sees sadness/suffering as an inevitable, unavoidable aspect of life. According to mindfulness; those who actually fight this are the ones who end up suffering more. As for those who actually embrace it, they end up finding inner peace (You might just have given me an idea for my next post! :D).
Thanks you for presenting your experience here. It will indeed motivate and encourage others!
All the best :)
Yes, indeed. I am so blessed. And because of my gratefulness, I wish to give back by helping others too.
You're absolutely right.It reminds me of what my best friend told me at that time when I used to say "I no longer feel like myself anymore. I am no longer the cheerful person that I once was." He said, "It is still YOU. The SAD YOU; the IMPERFECT YOU. Just another SIDE OF YOU. You have to accept the reality that you can't be perfect. You have to embrace your negative side too and understand it."
It enlightened me actually to accept the reality that life has a lot of ups and downs, and I can't expect to be happy always. Only when you start to accept something, that you actually fully understand it. I hope people would come to realize all these things and also accept their negative sides.
Thank you for your responses. I got a lot of insights!
Kudos to you! :)
I'm really sorry for being so talkative but I got so excited when I realized we have a lot of common interests. I'm actually an English major and I used to teach English to foreigners. I'm also fond of writing poems. Though my favorite subject is Math, I love Psychology and I took BA English as my degree. Hahahaha.
I rarely read posts in Steemit, but thanks to you, I now have something to look forward to.
More power to you! :)
You don't have to be sorry for anything! I will most like not get to your comments straight away, but they will never be left unanswered (even if it takes thee days!). Yep, we do seem to have a lot in common and that is why I am going to follow your blog :)
Your words are TOO kind! It is great to hear you have found something to look forward too here through my blog. But look, if you are a Maths and Science lover, I believe very much you would love to join the steemstem community! Just join the steemit.chat and look for the steemstem channel! :)
Have a great evening!
Thank you so much! I'm looking forward to your posts! :)