Pizzachain Poems -- Suffer

in #poetry6 years ago (edited)

Slowly appeared the ashes,
Rising from the fleshes,
Left behind the day before,
And today there'll only grow more.

In a world without any fun,
In a world where everyone got a gun,
Where we shoot without a reason,
Where we all admire treason,
It makes me sad to realise,
How our lives shall never be nice.

We're doomed to fall into a shallow street,
Just between the concepts of grabbing and greed,
We're doomed to fall into an endless pit,
Breaking down into tiny pieces, bit by bit.

No one can blame me for their misery, nor sorrow,
As it's not me, who caused the destruction of tomorrow,
I am fed with an eternal fire & fury, in my heart,
Though restrained by the beauty, of what I want to break apart.

But I'm free to see what I want,
And I won't admit to what you demand,
I will rise, growing myself rougher and tougher,
And without demise, I will make your suffer.

Credits:
-Poem writing: @pizzachain
-Picture: Pixabay

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woosh

This is pretty good, my colleague. Given that in your closing stanza, the speaker distances himself as far as opinion and blame worthiness go, I'd have posed the second stanzas as questions, like this ..

are we doomed to..

There are some minor issues to tighten up. If you wish, I'll post you a txt file with those in poetsunited, Sunday afternoon (UTC)

This sounds threatening, like a terrorist manifesto to me. I don't like it.

A poem has thrown me away
that's cool

Damn, why are so dark!
Totally loved it. Getting vibes of a legendary poet....

I like it very...
Please vote my post and reply them i will vote your post and vote them too.
https://steemit.com/life/@thewarrior007/ximending-youth-shopping-district-harajuku

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