I think what perhaps makes your response a bit "muddy" is that regardless of the motivation, selfish is always meaning acting in self-interest. There is the type of selfish action that, as you mentioned, is done with the acknowledgement that it is not in our best interest to harm or alienate others, and there are actions that fail to regard the actor as one of those people that is being hurt when it is an immoral act.

Thanks for the material, I am still fairly green in formally discussing philosophy and hadn't come across psychological egoism, looking forward to learning more about the topic and seeing the impact of this community on society!