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Every one of us has been scolded by someone before, reasonably or unreasonably, sometimes you will get angry, especially then people scolded you without any valid reason. You are just in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Those people that know me well enough or working with me for a period of time, they know that I am a calm and patient guy. It takes a very serious matter in order to trigger by anger.
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This morning, one of our customers reported an issue with our system. Knowing this customer, no matter how friendly we are with him, he will let go his temper on us, to show his unsatisfactory. Without impacting our technical team to do their job, I will have to show face to try to calm the situation. In other words, throw all his tantrum on me, not my technical team.
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After everything is settled, one of the technical team members asked me how can I handle the tantrum without throwing it back. My answer to him: Angry or Happy is the state-of-mind. You have the right to choose for yourself.
We are human. Angry is part of our feeling. It is alright to be angry. More importantly, it's the matter how we handle our anger. We have to understand that we have the power to choose either we want to be happy, angry or sad. It's all control in our mind. The below quote by James Allen perfectly illustrated the point that I wanted to express.
Mind is the master-power that moulds and makes,
And man is mind, and evermore he takes
The tool of thought, and, shaping what he wills,
Brings forth a thousand joys, a thousand ills –
He thinks in secret, and it comes to pass:
Environment is but a looking-glass.
– James Allen
You are the one responsible for yourself. You should be the one control your own feeling, no other person. If someone makes you angry and you choose to keep the anger, eventually ruin your days or weeks. Who is on the losing side?
Another good quote that I always remember:
I don't fix problems. I fix my thinking. Then problems fix themselves.
– Louise L. Hay
Our mind is the master mover. We choose how we want to react. The next time you got angry, step back, take a deep breath and try to remind yourself. Treat yourself better. We deserved to be happy.
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Amazing posts
Yep indeed, we always have a choice. Instead of being control by emotion, learn to be in control instead ;)
Unfortunately, a lot of people find it hard to do so tho... :(
It's a process of realization. Part of what life is about. :) I have met many preached so but they act the exact opposite. Everyone is still learning, so am i. So be forgiving .
This is where we need you. Your profession. :)
TQ. Then maybe u can recommend them to me ;).
Well said.
That is something that has been you. I encountered another episode of rude colleague again today, I let him know my thought, although he choose to keep up with his ignorant and arrogant attitude. Eventually I choose to forgive him but that’s not because what he does is okay, but to not allow his rudeness and negativity to affect me to perform better at my work. We should never allow negativity change who we are.
haha old friend knows me best.
Well done! You have been immune :P
There are important points to think about here. Staying calm in the face of some else's anger or personal attack takes courage and self-control. It's certainly not easy, but it is a choice. (Sometimes so is walking away until you can deal more calmly with the situation. Sometimes though, that's just not possible.)
You are absolutely right. It takes a lot of courage and self-control and it's certainly not easy, that is why a lot of people lost control of their behavior, especially working in a stressful environment.