The light to my darkness...

Today, I wanna talk about the girl who saved me from all the darkness I was drowning in. About the person who I felt being alive again with...

A few years ago, when I came back to Iran from the Philippines after living there for almost 10 years, a severe depression and anxiety was accompanying me from the huge culture shock and many other reasons which I'm not gonna discuss them here.(Not ready for that yet...)

A huge amount of this discomfort coming form having to attend military service, and of course being alone and not being able to really express myself with a person who wouldn't judge me or call my ideas crazy.

When you come back from another country, the culture actually goes in two sides. One side, is the person who came back and thinks I'm too different and no one understands me, and the other side is the people who see that person as an alien.

Solitude, was all I had, pretty much for around a year. I tried to be my own company, and it actually worked. Learning how to love self was something valuable and important. But, still the need to have and one person around me never left me. I really understood that for me to live better, I need to have that one person live for...

It is not easy at all, to find a person matching your ideas in a country which you haven't lived in for 10 years. So in the search of a person who'd fit me, I again had to go through many trials and errors. To test the waters. To see if...

These trials continued till I went to attend my duty in the Iranian Navy. 3 months in, on one of my worst days, when I was finishing up a drawing project in a café. My friends messaged me that They wanna see me and that they were on their way coming to the café.

With one of my friends, a girl came in whom I knew form before. But, that night something was different about her. It was like all the feelings from the bad events of that horrible day went away after seeing that girl.

I was in the middle of my duty and had come to town for just a short break. I wasn't sure if this was a right situation, or if she would actually get involved since I still had more than a year of service. But I did gather all my strength and asked for her number. And actually she did give it to me.

My service came to an end, with her waiting all the way, for me to come back...

Calling, and messaging every single night. Talking about everything, and I mean everything. She stayed, she waited, she was the lights in the darkest nights. She was the hope to my hopeless times...

Maryam, is my wife now. The person who makes me smile even right now when I'm writing this for you, and she's not even around. Every single day I'm thanking whatever that is out there for putting her in my way. The person who is not perfect, but is the best I could ever have found...

I'm also thankful for having her kind family in my life. Her brother, Ali is a blessing, and I actually like being an older brother to him.

I think I really needed to write about them, not for the sake of writing a post, but for expressing my gratitude towards having a person, whom living without, frightens me...

Thank you for reading this. ✌️🙂

Peace! 🖤