Hustle now and play later. These words has been a mantra of millennials. It implies that no one will benefit the most from the fruit of your own labor but you. Indeed, it is a fact.
How I wish I can hustle like most people does. However, recently I have been silently struggling with serious headache which resulted to sleeplessness. It was almost a month of discomfort and disorientation. Headache is part of my symptoms caused by multiple diseases I possess but these episodes are really exhausting. Imagine getting up feeling tired and lifeless.
The whole experience is draining. Though I have been consulting with my doctor online and undergone measures and procedures, still the headache persisted. The entire situation was even aggravated by consequent vomiting and diarrhea.
I'm laughing now, but few days ago, I gave my pin numbers to a friend just in case something happened(morbid). Then, few days ago, one of my doctor instructed to stop on taking my recent medicine. And so, I was able to recover before the big day.
On and off. Im this kind of person. I am not consistent. As you can see, I can't hustle. There will be times, I have to stop, take a step back and hibernate (almost) until I am able to recover. I am not just a PWD, I am also battling with multiple diseases every single day.
Start again. This has been my life. I have to start from the beginning, or start from where I stopped. Bring back the zeal, realize the part from where I was distracted, pick myself up and continue the journey.
Managing 20+ diseases, has been a challenge. Little by little I am adopting myself to it. I wasn't healed, I was just able to accept my condition and learn to manage the pain.
So why am I writing this?
If ever you know someone with the same situation...they probably are dramatic, anti-social, complainers and moody... and... Yes! Hard to understand as well, please bare with them, with us.
It is so hard to express how you feel or what you feel, when you yourself can't explain what is happening...or where the pain/discomfort is coming from.
For people like me who is experiencing the same, distancing yourself and meditating on your body parts will be a big help. Try to relax, take deep breathes and start scanning your self one body part at a time. Remember to take professional advice too. Meditation can help you locate where the pain is coming from and a medical judgement can resolve it.
To my circle, sorry for the delays lutang moments and forgetfullness. Thank you for the patience, encouragement and an ear to listen.
As I was writing this post, I spend hours waiting for a decent connection to finish some task but to no avail. Sana makabit n ang converge. Wala lang nasingit ko lang. Dahil walang connection, I have the time to reflect and write this.
Before I end I will leave this words:
A strong person is not afraid over and over again when all that he worked for turns to waste
Motivating mysself...will pause but will not quit
