i couldn't kill that animal in the end! Maybe when it will a life or death situation and I will need it in order to survive, I will be able. But now, simply, I didn't want to kill... I wrote some thoughts here https://steemit.com/philosophy/@purplemoon/inner-peace-within-body-and-mind-meditation-plant-medicine-human-design-mind-as-a-best-friend-moral-questions-two-chicks-being

kudos to you, brave killer friend! :)