This holiday season, forget debating any form of politics around the dinner table and instead focus on the greatest debate ever to be had: is Die Hard a Christmas movie? In short, the answer is yes. Yes, “Die Hard” is a Christmas movie. In this piece I’ll break down all the opposing arguments to this statement and what your responses should be if that annoying know-it-all cousin of yours, or that weird creepy uncle of yours or even that ‘Karen’ mother-in-law of yours, attempts to claim that “Die Hard” is not a Christmas movie. Enjoy, and season greetings to all of you!
Argument 1: It’s too violent to be a “Christmas Movie”
Firstly, have you seen “Home Alone”? That film literally features a sociopath who makes little traps to catch two burglars. Yes, “Die Hard” features some graphic violence, but it’s an action film. It’s meant to be gritty and bloody. We are meant to identify with John McClane (Bruce Willis), who is our ‘everyday’ man and is meant to be seen as vulnerable. “Die Hard” was made in a time before Marvel action films, so McClane was seen all bloody and sweaty, hurting his feet on broken glass and becoming more and more wearier as the story progresses. There’s many other Christmas movies that have violent/adult themes aside from the obvious (“Home Alone”- that film is brutal), for example what about “It’s a Wonderful Life”? That film is centred around someone wanting to end their life...And, you’re trying to tell me that “Die Hard” is messed up because there happens to be shooting and punching involved, please!
Argument 2: There’s no romance
McClane is only in L.A. because he wants to win back his estranged wife Holly (Bonnie Bedelia), which just shows how committed he is to his marriage. He manages to rescue her from Hans Gruber (Alan Rickman) right at the end of the film, which is dead romantic in my eyes. And, what’s all this nonsense about Christmas movies having to feature romance? One in nine Americans spend Christmas alone, and the remaining 8 are probably wishing they were alone.
Argument 3: But it was released in the Summer
Yes, technically speaking “Die Hard” was released on 15th July 1988. But, did you know that “Holiday Inn” was released in August? Or that the original “Miracle on 34th Street” was released in June? Heck, even “Gremlins” was released in June. If a studio feels like their film is going to fare better being released in the summer, then they’ll make that decision. It’s just how it is.
Argument 4: But it’s not a family movie
My parents let me watched various action flicks growing up and I’ve turned out perfectly normal...Okay, I’m probably not the best example of a normal functioning adult, but if you want to fire back at this argument you can use the example of how certain ‘family friendly’ films such as “Elf” feature some problematic scenes (why is Buddy the elf walking in on Zooey Deschanel’s character whilst she’s in the shower?). What about “Jack Frost” where the soul of a boy’s dead father enters a snowman and comes to life- that’s really disturbing. Also, I just want to bring up another family friendly film which freaks me out, “Polar Express”. How can anyone like watching those ‘dead eyed’ CGI characters? Nah, keep that shit away from me.
Argument 5: What about the fact that most people don’t think it’s a Christmas movie?
Apparently, a recent study by YouGov and Disney+ discovered that 47 percent of people who have seen 'Die Hard' say it is not a Christmas film while 44 per cent insists that it is one. Well, 47 percent of the human population are wrong...It’s okay, these are probably the same people who believe the earth is flat or something (joking!). Of course, these people have the freedom to believe in whatever they want, so if someone uses this line against you, just be the bigger person and reply back with “They’re entitled to their opinion, and so am I.”
Well, I hope this piece has been useful. Whether or not you agree with me that “Die Hard” is a Christmas movie or not, please make sure you take care this Christmas and enjoy spending the time with your loved ones.
Yippee-ki-yay, motherfuckers.
Photos from IMDb.
Yes.