We strive toward our ideal selves. But there's an easier and more important first step...
Whether you lived through truly hard times or just experienced subtle arguments and small inconveniences, there was likely to be a person that you needed early on in your life but didn't fully get from your parents, teachers, relatives, or friends.
Don't repeat the cycle.
Be that person: the one you needed back then.
You will help yourself tremendously by doing so...