Two Years of PolyAnnie
My story of becoming an erotic NFT artist & adult content creator
What started off as a mission to explore the connection between creativity and sexuality turned into a journey in the world of tech, blockchain & online content creation.
This is my story of my mission as PolyAnnie…
Two years ago I became very clear that I was ready to make a liveable income as an artist while documenting the process. In documenting my journey I am leaving behind a trail for others to follow. I hope to pave the way for many people to be empowered self sovereign humans. I feel like I’ve made tremendous progress towards those early goals. I started the PolyAnnie brand officially on June 20, 2019.
A few months prior my car broke down. I looked for a new one but nothing really clicked and I trust my intuition especially when it comes to cars. It became too hard to get to work which was 30 min away and I landed an art deal to make 25 vinyl pieces for a music shop so I quit the job and made a lot of art! Then in June my focus took a huge turn… sexuality. I felt more sexually charged than ever! So I decided I would make erotic vinyl art. And document my sexual awakening. The goal was to see if I could bring value to myself by showing this particular perspective of the human experience. I had a ton of other skills and potential approaches but I pretty much chose to reinvent myself and start fresh. So I did. On my 33rd birthday I started a painting on Chaturbate… then I shaved my head. Live. That was my ceremony, my way of preparing for this new chapter in my life. I reinvented my image, my name, my digital persona as well as my work focus.
The first half year of PolyAnnie was tough financially and emotionally. I had to take out 5 credit cards to get through that time. But I felt this dedication that was unstoppable. And also in desperation, I had no choice but to try or go get another serving job but without a vehicle options were seriously limited. I wanted to be home with my kids and I didn’t want to go into debt to get a car that I would have to work extra just to pay for.
I had my own idea of how I wanted to spend my days. I just can’t justify exchanging my time for money and have someone else dictate those terms. I prefer to wear what I want and have the freedom to exist the way I want to. If I had a creative inspiration, an urge, I want to be able to follow it. I can’t just save it for later. When it’s there, it’s there. And I was never making enough at any job to pay all the bills so that made it even less desirable. I am not motivated by money. Actually rather repelled by it for most of my life. I’m driven by something else. Freedom. It’s been a bit challenging existing in this world when you're not motivated by money. But I have methods for finding deeper meaning and purpose to actions that must be done to survive and so I’ve found ways to get by. Which have included whatever needed to be done. I worked 2 jobs and taught hoop classes in the evenings for a time. I had a fancy government job. I helped start & run an urban farm. I had a line of natural body care products and I would lead classes to educate. Sold anything I could make - jewelry, clothing, hula hoops, art. Made independent porn. I've always done my best to stay true to myself and creative nature, and that’s led me down many roads. I’ve always made just enough to get by and have from time to time had to go to friends, family and community for help. Now my art supports me and my children entirely. It’s a humble living but I am free.
The first year of PolyAnnie was based around self improvement and documentation of creating this life I wanted. I live streamed my workouts, creative practices and art creating. I simply wanted to document my life and work but didn’t quite understand yet how to monetize that. I worked my ass off posting to OnlyFans and only charged $5 a month for the whole first year! Oh man I feel like I struggled so hard making money that first year. But I always kept true to myself and since I’m not motivated by money I got through the hardest times.
My approach to being an adult content creator has been unique to me. I started it because I genuinely wanted an outlet to explore my sexuality and it was important to me to document it. I started recognizing the connection between sexuality and creativity for me and I knew it would be an interesting journey. I had come from a life of being a regular chick who had monogamous relationships. Pretty vanilla. I also rarely, very very rarely watch porn. Even still. It’s just not my thing for entertainment and I use masturbation as a meditation. But exploring polyamory was a catalyst for much growth and change in my life. So I jumped into PolyAnnie with the same fearless and unique spin I’ve put into all the projects I’ve started. I’m not much for planning. Just rather go for it and figure it out as I go. You don’t wait for things to be a certain way, you just start and then it all flows and happens. When I do or learn new things I like to just figure it out on my own rather than observe and copy what others are doing. So I started as a cam model on Chaturbate. I had no freaking idea what to do or how to be seductive or get ppl to tip. I remember feeling super uncomfortable most of the time if I was trying to be sexual but I stuck with it and tried a different approach. If I was just doing me, whatever I wanted to do in that moment it went great! I made all my erotic vinyl on metal pieces there and most of my paintings. I enjoy the performance element of live art. Sometimes I get on briefly while I’m getting ready for my day and just chat. I make more money on Chaturbate with my clothes on being authentic than I do trying to be seductive. Like if I’m feeling it I’m feeling it. I’m not interested in putting on a no passion act for money. I feel strongly about representing my authentic sexuality. But this approach doesn’t really make you lots of money. Not at first anyways. I had to figure out what I felt comfortable with doing, what value that had and how to make that value visible to others. I've always wanted to be the kind of creator that offered a genuine perspective. I focus mostly on sharing my content and art. I rarely do customs. Only if it’s something that speaks to me. I don’t like the pay to see more approach, unless it’s a really special piece of content. Even though I’m not the best at monetizing my work, I’m certainly good at making it. I’m an exhibitionist, an entertainer and a sexually empowered woman. This is perfect work for me and I love it! I’ve relied on tips and subscriptions for most of my income. I regularly remind fans of that and kindly ask for tips when needed. I have amazing fans. Many have been with me for a year, and some since I started! They are respectful and kind and even the ones who never speak or interact… I know they are there and I appreciate them too.
My life right now would not be possible without them.
In that first year I discovered that I’m sapiosexual (attracted to intelligence), I can squirt, that I like big dildos but all size penises and that being aroused makes me more creative. I learned sexuality is as unique as each individual, it’s not always what is fed to us in the media. Also learned that I prefer to be horny over satisfied and edging is now part of my creative process. I’ve also become really connected to my body and am more confident than I’ve been before in my skin. It was difficult to let go of my personal programming around what an adult entertainer was. I didn’t look like those women I saw in the few porn videos I had seen or like the sexy women in movies and on Instagram. I had to rediscover what sexuality was to me and how it was expressed through my unique perspective.
Throughout the two years doing the PolyAnnie work I rediscovered and refined my mission, my purpose. I am still on the path of authentically documenting my sexuality and exploring my creative sexual expression… but I have fine tuned how I want to serve the collective in that process. I’m using my work to explore solutions to censorship, income inequality and individual data ownership. These things all go together and as an online sex worker in the world of crypto, I’ve had enough experiences to show me just how important finding solutions to these things are.
Income Inequality
I’m a single mom. Growing up my mom was also a single mom and money was always tight. Poverty is painful and I’m pretty sure there are more than enough resources on this planet that no people should be without their basic needs. I watched my mom work 3 jobs and still struggle. I’ve seen some of the hardest working people I know not be able to get out of poverty. The American dream is dead. They taught us growing up that if you worked hard and stayed in line that you could have it all, but that’s bullshit.
I’m one the hardest working people you’ll ever meet. My mom taught me a strong work ethic and I’m just a naturally energetic person- relaxing isn’t a pastime I enjoy. But I’m not willing to play a game that is designed to make me lose. So I’ve lived my life my own way… at least as best I can.
Living life the way I want is valuable, even if it’s different from what everyone else is doing. Why is my worth as a person in society measured by the amount of money I have? Why do we need to work 40 hours a week at things we don’t really care about, which is the reality for many people. Why does my existence have to revolve around making money? I acknowledge it’s a part of life, but when you live in poverty, it becomes the most important thing. And it drives most of the population's behavior, even those not in poverty. Why are we only allowed to use a monetary system that is designed to keep people in debt? Why are the people making decisions for us so far detached from the reality of life for the majority?
I vision a world where making money takes 8 minutes a day versus 8 hours a day. A world where our contributions and value are actually accounted for properly. No person working a full time job should be applying for govt assistance. IMO even those working part time should be able to live comfortably. But again not the case. Perfect example: the teachers in West Virginia went on strike multiple times because they weren’t making a livable wage and were forced to apply for government assistance. Our teachers are having to apply for assistance just to live. The educators of our children. Meanwhile other humans have multiple houses, private jets, etc. Something just isn’t right about this. I don’t know the solution for the whole world but for my life, I’ve been on a mission to figure out how to make money and stay true to myself which means not letting money dictate my actions.
In my first 5 months selling NFTs I made 10.11 ETH. I gave 70% of that away, back to build the community. I did this by helping artists with crypto to cover gas fees, buying NFTs, and helping new to crypto folks start wallets. At the time 10.11 ETH was around $20k. And despite all I sent out, I still had close to that much from my other investments. That’s when I knew this was something I was serious about getting serious about. It was like a dream come true. I can be generous and it regenerates. This makes much more sense to me. Usually I’m only able to give money to bills, and it doesn’t replenish. The utility companies aren't really my community. They don’t give a whole fuck about me to be honest. They’ve shut my water off before for being $10 short. Shut my internet off when I have kids schooling from home because we were on a lockdown and the schools were shut down. But I should dedicate all my time and energy making money to pay them? What is this game? And why are we playing it like this? I appreciate the service but I think we can do better. I know we can do better. Because actions like this tell me money is more important than education, seeing as they can take away access for children to learn if their parents can’t pay the bill. What sense does that even make? They paid someone to shut it off. Then paid them again to come turn it back on. Am I the only one who finds this absurd? We just accept this and move on? I want more systems where I can be generous and helpful to others without it risking my livelihood.
Living in poverty for me has created a lot of stress for a long time. We all know the effects of stress on the body. It’s like once one month of figuring out money is over, the next one is right there. And compared to some I have it easy. People are suffering for no reason. Why are artists “starving”? Think about that statement- starving artist. It’s so common. We idolize those who come up and feed them to grow and grow… but that’s like watering one plant in a garden. I feel embarrassed for our species when Elon musk can make a tweet about crypto and impact the entire market. Why do we blindly follow celebrities and influencers? I encourage more people to think for themselves and ensure all the plants in the garden get water.
I’m still not out of poverty, but I’m much more secure. I can float with my artist income. I work hard but I love it. I pretty much do what I feel inspired to do each day. Next step is extra money and resources to work with for tech upgrades and ability to easily travel. I have laid a great foundation to really grow from.
As my abundance grows I will remain generous. I have simple needs. I would rather buy 70 people $3,000 cars than a lambo for myself. No judgment if you’re into lambos. I just know that a car could change someone’s life. Shit $1,000 can change someone’s life. Get mine vs. grow ours. Like it or not we are all in this together with every other living organism on the planet.
Solutions I’ve found on an individual level:
Diversity works. Having multiple streams for money to flow to you is safer than relying on one stream.
Defi (decentralized finance) has allowed me to actually participate as a real player in this world. I feel connected to my finances in the crypto space.
Make your value visible. We all have value and if you wait around for other people to step up and do this for you, you’ll likely be waiting forever. Nobody is going to come to you and give you the life you want. It’s up to you to make that happen.
Crypto gives us more opportunities.
Be resourceful- work with what you have from where you’re at. I create 98% from mobile. This allows me to work from anywhere. A clip board, my phone, a tripod and an extra battery. It’s a light load, it’s efficient.
Develop your self awareness. Explore what skills and knowledge you already have. You likely have more to offer the world than you realize.
Individual Data ownership could create a basic income for most humans. 7 out of 10 of the wealthiest companies in the world are tech companies that either directly generate profit from data or are empowered by data from the core. Think about that for a minute. Our data is being exploited by companies making massive profits and we don’t see a dime of that. Seems a bit fucked up if you ask me.
Other Lessons Learned about income-
Don’t let the amount of money in your wallet or bank account impact your emotions. It’s just data. A number. Especially with crypto. When you look at your wallet amount in dollars just know that any moment that could be zero, none, gone. So don’t rely on it. Diversity is key. And when it goes down don’t freak out. It’s ok. If you really believe in the tokens you hold, you know it’ll go back up. It’s all a part of it. Price goes down and up in relation to the dollar. But IMO a good crypto token has more value than just what it’s worth in dollars so it really doesn’t matter too much. Learn to listen to your intuition. Explore some self awareness techniques so you can use your body & mind to feel your way to the right ones for you. The body is intelligent and if we tune into it, it guides us. I absolutely believe in every token I’ve invested in. I don’t doubt myself. It’s an obvious yes or no to me. I have not been wrong yet. Once I become interested in a project or token I get involved and learn, participate in community and really feel it out. The community really shows a lot about the strength and essence of any crypto token or project. And some very small communities that don’t market and shill and do that thing, are strong and work perfectly.
Crypto is allowing communities to emerge that can sustain without having to grow. This is important. Capitalism makes it almost impossible to have a business, non profit, whatever without having to grow for it to work. But not all things need to grow. Some projects work perfect for the community they serve and the token price isn’t all that important.
Censorship & Individual Data Ownership
My first experience with censorship- periscope disabled my 10k follower account. I deserved it. I learned my lesson. I started a new one, followed the rules. I completed 130 days of consecutive live yoga, hula hooping & music practice. I built my following to 20k and then one day my account was disabled with no warning or explanation. It was a huge blow to my business. That experience caused me to become passionate about censorship and also individual data ownership.
When they disabled my account all the recordings and documentation of my 130 days of self improvement were gone. Why the fuck did I not have the option or opportunity to save my videos. After this I spent months learning about how our data is sold and used. And when I heard that 7 out of the 10 wealthiest companies in the world are data centric companies. They make their money from our data… which we generate everytime we use our smartphones or get on the internet. Meanwhile my internet is getting shut off. But the wealthiest companies in the world are wealthy because of what is rightfully mine and yours. Sounds like a familiar story doesn’t it?
I believe that our digital bodies; which include our profiles, content and data, are an extension of our physical bodies and should be treated as such. There are human rights that protect our bodies and property but our digital bodies are exploited, manipulated, and controlled. I couldn’t even open Facebook, YouTube or Google for a little while without feeling creeped out. I still use the platforms though because I have to operate as an artist working from home. I’m happy to see more and more adjustments being made in our data rights. But we still have a long way to go. If someone is going to profit from my data, I should definitely be a part of that. I also feel that access to our personal data would be amazing. If these big tech companies can use our data to put ads in our faces they know will get our attention, imagine if we could use that for self improvement?!
More about censorship… it’s getting worse. Censorship is caused by centralized authority having the ability to remove any persons or content from a platform. It’s kinda a tricky subject that doesn’t have a simple solution. I do believe that centralization is good in some circumstances. Actually better. But when our main connection to communicate and exist online can be cut off at any time for any reason and all your story with it. I understand there are rules, but we need a more human approach.
I recently had both my twitter accounts suspended wrongly. It took almost a month for them to get to my appeals and then acknowledge they were wrong and reinstate my account. That’s bullshit. And yes if I don’t like it I can go to other platforms but there won’t be the same reach. When they took my twitter I felt like I was being denied the ability to communicate with my friends and community, it was during my first serious crypto dip. When I really needed those guys the most. It felt really yucky to me to be denied access to the place I had spent the most of my time and built my strongest community.
Another time I got permanently banned on Bigo with a 21k following built in less than a year and money on the app. They locked me out of my account. With Bigo you have the opportunity to pay for vip points which can be used to unlock the banned account. So I had to pay $200 to get my account back. Sounds shady af right?! But I had to. I had an $800 paycheck coming to me and people that depended on me there. They had me backed into a corner.
I’ve had my IG suspended at least twice. Had restrictions put on my YouTube so I couldn’t post. It’s always frustrating and a pain in the ass. Yes I have some nude art and adult themes… but I’m an adult. And I wish it was as simple as following the tos and community guidelines and you should have no problem.. but it doesn’t work like that unfortunately. This happens too often to those who work in the adult industry. There are ppl who dictate those rules, and we don’t get any say in this and often they are misinformed or only acknowledge one perspective. I consider myself a positive online figure. I’m tasteful and respectful. I don’t get involved in politics or any kind of drama. I just share my art and market my brand. And I get censored a lot. It’s hard to understand just how devastating this can be until it happens to you. Starting over to build a following isn’t easy. Especially when you’ve lost all your work which you spent time posting that you could reshare but you have to start over. I still find it hard to believe I got the same treatment as Donald trump on twitter. How is sharing tasteful sex positive art even in the same ball Park? Where do we draw the line with what’s acceptable and what isn’t? And who gets to decide these things? Platforms are put under pressure from payment processors and app hosting which are pressured by policies set by the government. The ability to dictate the narrative on the internet is not something that should be in the hands of lawmakers. Because they are also dictating how history will be documented. This story also sounds familiar doesn’t it?
Solutions:
Diversify what platforms and social sites you use. Not just a back up IG or twitter. Explore alternative, censorship resistant social sites. Some that I have found and use are:
Sharesome
Peakd & 3speak on Hive
Lips Social
DTube
Help share others stories- Call it out and provide assistance
Blockchain tech provides us the tools to build economies and communities around what’s important to us.
Holochain is even more forward thinking. Holochain is an open source framework for building fully distributed, peer-to-peer applications. The purpose of Holochain is to enable humans to interact with each other by mutual-consent to a shared set of rules, without relying on any authority to dictate or unilaterally change those rules.
Get involved. Seriously don’t talk about it, be about it.
I’d also like to shout out some key people who have been significant in my journey:
In order from the early days till now-
Greg Kerr: My story wouldn’t be what it is without him. My best friend and one of the most brilliant and unique humans I’ve had the pleasure of knowing. He pushed me to take more risks and become more than I could have imagined.
Randy: we share a love for exhibitionism and he was a huge emotional support for me during my most challenging days of PolyAnnie
Donald: my good morning coffee friend. He sent me mugs and made good morning videos and we shared love of music and good vibes. He’s the one who commissioned the PolyAnnie doll.
Feet Friend: we shared a love of time lapse videos. He bought me a tripod when I needed one so bad… mine was duct taped together and busted.
Magical Unicorn: a chaturbate friend that shared the most amazing healing session for myself I’ve ever had. He helped me believe in myself & guided me through a lot of self love.
Chaturbate talking friend: can’t for the life of me remember his name but I remember him. He bought me a beautiful sweater and we spent many times on Chaturbate just talking. He taught me about grace.
Richard: a sweet heart on OnlyFans, we would send silly face selfies and I appreciated that a lot
Z: Hands down my biggest supporter!! We met on Bigo in 2020 and he’s been by my side since. He consistently shows up for me and my life wouldn’t be what it is without him!
Magic Man: My longest standing OnlyFans subscriber- starting in 2019. One of the few people I make customs for. It just feels right.
Zingo: Lover of nipples! Been a huge support to me on OnlyFans.
Missing Link: is a super awesome OnlyFans subscriber. Been with me for over a year!
Mr. AI South: My second longest standing subscriber on OnlyFans… starting in 2019! We share a love of art. I’ve enjoyed following him as much as he has me!
Serious: we connected originally as hosts on Bigo and even though I’ve moved away from Bigo we still keep in contact!
Other OnlyFans supporters that stand out to me:
Tom C, Punk19, Eyes wide shut, and Ra_be_stee
Root Draws: A brilliant human as amazing artist that is responsible for my involvement in NFTs. I trust and appreciate his ideas and guidance. I owe a debt of gratitude to him always.
Reneil: My first collector and crypto/NFT mentor. He helped guide me as I learned NFT strategy & pricing. He’s an incredible pioneer and contributor to this movement!
Abracadabra: Guided me towards Hex. One of the most profitable and life changing things that happened to me. He is my Hex mentor.
Julia K Ponsford: Bought my very first NFT ever. My ultimate genesis piece on the NFT Showroom. She’s an amazing multi talented NFT artist and a true pioneer in the NFT space.
Aryabhatta: We met through Holochain. We connected instantly through an unspoken spiritual language. Together we learned currency design and spent much time sharing ideas and projects. Currency skunk OG and a beautiful soul.
Arthur Brock: A brilliant man whose teachings on currency design lit me up. It was an honor to meet him and his words impacted me in rippling ways. I will always believe in the Holochain vision.
Steven Morris: Another significant connection I made through Holochain. He traded me a holoport for a piece of my art and has been a pleasant and easy person to interact with.
5ksana: When I think about the cryptoart community I think of her. She’s an amazing multi talented artist and even better friend. Has been supportive, kind and loving to me.
Yuser: I helped him with gas to mint his first NFT and we’ve been connected since. The only person of all those I helped that really stuck around with me. There’s something I see in him
and his work that hasn’t been revealed yet to me. I feel connected to him in unspoken spiritual ways and look forward to the unfolding of this story.
CryptoWarrior: Another person they when I think of cryptoart I think of this person. He always includes me in twitter stuff and is just a pillar for the community.
Charles Monroe: My idea friend. We share knowledge and updates in the NFT space. One of the few people I can have a phone call with and not have a panic attack. A trial blazer and art supporter extraordinaire.
Devan: A fellow NFT creator that I’ve found connection and mutual support from.
Kevin on Earth: A good dude with an inspiring sense of community.
Reflecting on these people was really profound and emotional for me. Thank you all so much. And everyone who I didn’t mention by name that has supported, encouraged and believed in me. I thank you all with all my being.
Here’s to year 3 of PolyAnnie and year 35 of my life.