Love & marriage 23

in #love8 years ago (edited)

I thought I would today tell wife’s how to keep their husbands happy, but once I started to research the topic I come to see that before wive's can start to keep their husband's happy they need to know how their husband's sexuality works.

Most women know that sex is very important for men in their marriages. The average wife would acknowledge that her husband’s sex drive is stronger than hers, but she still underestimates the importance of this on their marriage. Husband’s often felt that their wives don't understand his sex drive and they feel alone with their secrets and desires and don’t know how to communicate this to their wives. Wifes make their husbands feel like there is something wrong with them for wanting sex more. It is seen as passion without love, or a sex drive without self-control.

When men were asked if there is something that they could change in their marriage, 80-90% said they wish they had a better sex life and that their wives would more initiate sex. Lots of women think that men are only interested in their own needs but the majority of men also said that mutual pleasure is important for them. So although there are a time and a place for a “quickie” in the long run, that would not make for you husband to be happy with his sex life.

One of the biggest differences between you and your husband is the fact that he experiences sex as a physical need. His sexual need is determined by the presence of testosterone in his body. Immediately after sex, he feels a release but as his body starts to build up sperm again he will feel another need for sexual release. Women don’t experience the physiological drive for sex in the same way. A woman’s sexuality is far more connected to her emotions and hormones.

Although his sex drive is a physical need it has a big impact on his emotional, marital and spiritual well-being. Men’s confidence and a greater sense of well-being are related to his ability to perform sexually, to arouse and please his wife. So then a fulfilling sex life also become an emotional need for a husband. If a wife just goes through the motions it is not enough for a husband. He longs to know that he is pleasing his wife and that she is sexually interested in him. A wife cannot say, I love my husband, but reject him sexually. His sexuality is part of who he is both as a man and a husband.

Then lastly, men's sex life impacts their spiritual life. It is a daily battle for men to not give in to all the temptations around them. If his sexual needs are fulfilled there is a far bigger chance that he will stay loyal, not give in to temptations, like to have an affair, watching porn, etc. I am not saying if your husband does this it is your fault. He is still responsible for his own life and the choices he makes, but resisting the temptations will be much easier for him if he has a good marriage where his physical and emotional needs are met.

Images: pixabay.com
https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/sex-and-intimacy/understanding-your-husbands-sexual-needs

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Thanks a lot for this informative message this day. It is really what you said. Men are always ready to have sex and i understand most women do feel that way about sex so this at times also causes confusion. Sex is a beautiful thing created by God to be shared between a Man and a wife. I believe if both man and wife make time to understanf each other as you have said, more marriages will not end up in divorces

Thank you for your kind comment. You are right about a beautiful thing created by God. You can follow this blog of mine. I post almost every day on Love and marriage.

Just to add on that, sex between the married couple should be an open topic to be discussed by both parties. Try and strike the balance and come to an understanding as to how couples can satisfy one another,

yes, thank you @veejay. Without the communication, there can never be an understanding or a solution for both husband and wife. Also thank you very much for the resteem!

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Pretty much all of this is right on. I've been married 27 years, and almost everything you say here rings true. I've been lucky--very lucky--but every one of my friends tells me just about exactly what you've written, and I know it myself all too well.

Thank you @crisof. I am glad that you are happily married. I am doing this blog Love and marriage almost daily if you want to follow me.

I'm following. You bet!

Thank you appreciated!

Well said article. Unfortunately because folks are so self absorbed these days, they do not take the time to understands each others needs and dismiss their partners needs as being over sexed. Sad but true. Thanks!

Thank you @enjoywithtroy. Researching this it was even an eye opener to me. I hope that some wives will see it and come to a better understanding of their husband's needs. Thank you for your support!

that would wonderful if it could reach others. Best wishes.

@sashin my friend, thank you very much for the resteem. I really appreciate!

Was this supposed to be a lesson about myself or a lesson for women about men? Lol. This was chalked full of knowledge bombs. Very useful. Very good job once again.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. Would you think of possibly adding more to your titles? For Example: Love and Marriage 23. How To Keep Your Husband Happy. I really think it would help with your readership if someone who did not know about this series could tell what info was included within your story posts. It's very valuable and would love for more people to read. It's ok if you tell me to walk the plank. Lol. Just trying to be helpful.

I will think about it. I was afraid if maybe I put something about sex in the title, maybe some people won't read it. Or maybe like for example about communication, they might think not that again. But maybe you are right. Will think about it. :-)

hehe, I wanted to give advice to women and then while researching I saw there was so much more than I know or think. So it was also a lesson for me. So let's just say it was about men for men and woman. :-) Thank you for your comment, I appreciate it.

How you describe women's view & men emotional need to please is an eye opener. My favorite quotes below.

It is seen as passion without love, or a sex drive without self-control. & So then a fulfilling sex life also become an emotional need for a husband

Where did you learn all of this?

I read a lot of articles on the subject on the internet and out of that start writing my posts. The quote above, the first part was written just like that. I thought I knew everything about a man's sexuality and researching that, was also a big eye-opener for me. Thank you for reading.