Don't force love

Don't force love. Romantic love is thrilling, abundant, and cannot be doubted. It is like a tidal wave: it wakes up, continues, until one day spills over, and there is no compulsion for it to appear when it is not there. You cannot "make" yourself love someone. (You can "learn" to love someone, but it is more a matter of time and getting to know others). If you read this guide because you are in a relationship but do not feel love for your partner, there is no really easy way to change that. If you really want to, consider visiting several joint counselors; if not, maybe it's time to break up.

• Give him time. Romantic love is like a plant: the seeds can grow quickly, but to expand the analogy, think about love that is fast and crazy as the pleasure you feel when you first see a bud appear through the surface of the soil. When you get used to the idea that love is there, the initial vibration won't last. It's okay: a fully developed relationship that will produce fruit. Creating eternal love requires attention and care, but the results are worthy.

  Don't wait for something to happen. Even though eternal love takes time to develop. Some people spend years tethering to someone they no longer love, and others really love each new partner, but never really find someone to live in a household. Find balanced happiness by making your relationship an active and sustainable project. Intend to make it eternal, and intend to make it great.

• Love completely. Of course, this does not mean treating your loved ones as if he had never done anything wrong. On the contrary, that means besides focusing on what you love about your partner, you have to acknowledge the things you don't like and even so you decide to love them. When you love someone completely, it will be easy to forgive and forget the debate. You might even find that some of the mistakes of your loved ones begin to be charming, in time.

  Obviously, some people have flaws or differences that you will not be able to forgive or accept. These people are not people you should love for life. It's okay (and important) to draw lines that are personally important to you. Remember, you are a partner, not a servant. Your desires and needs are valuable as well as your loved ones. Don't look for someone who is perfect, or you will never find true love.

• Communicate. Eternal love is the result of good communication. This does not always mean being talkative. Communication between partners is about learning to understand each other and respecting each other's boundaries, whether physical, intellectual, emotional, or spiritual. Do your best to see through your partner's eyes and understand where they come from so that you can communicate what you want to say in a way that they will understand.

  Learn from your mistakes in communicating. If you say something that you think is harmless, but your partner becomes angry because of it, don't argue about how they respond. Instead, explain what you mean and try to avoid saying that in an annoying way in the future.
  Face important issues directly. Not everyone is comfortable to address problems, especially to their loved ones. However, the direct approach is the best and the surest way to solve the problem and stop the worry. Stay calm, and always talk with love and respect for your partner. Criticizing or attacking your loved ones is not the same as trying to find a resolution to a relationship problem.

Accept differences that do not affect relationships. If you are disturbed by your partner's opinion on something that is relatively unimportant, such as a favorite band or a food that your partner refuses to eat, forget it. It doesn't make a difference to your feelings to him. There is no reason to argue about that.

• Make your love known. Some things prove you love someone more clearly than make it appear. Don't be shy to say sweet things, praise, or romantic things,