Because of Your Password..

in #love7 years ago (edited)

image

I think you're the best for me
I think you always love me
You said you were always faithful to me
You told me the most beautiful in your life
But you're dusting me, you hurt me
Well that's a song I've always dendang with a disappointment. I'm the one who thinks he's the best for me I'm the one who always adores him. But in reality it is only a piece of wound he gave.

Hmm, "Dwi Bagus" is the one I think is the best I have pocketed in every breath. But basically he was injured in my life. It all started when I Erinka Zahrana entered SMK, I have a friend named Pratiwi. He introduced me to Bagus, and obey that Bagus is his girlfriend Tiwi. Their relationship is always shrouded in quarrels, because according to Bagus Tiwi just make him a showcase to friends or maybe more clearly called the material impingement. I also always advise Tiwi to pay attention to Good, so that one day he will not regret.

At first me and Bagus just a regular vent friend, occasionally maybe I also never bales smsnya. because I'm lazy he always fill my inbox hpku. Once upon a time I was very close to Bagus when we got the new year's holiday, that's where I was and he was very close and even at all times my hp was just him filling up. And that is very unique me and he has a special call that is "om and aunt" haha, maybe a strange thing, but let me be fun just aja. In the end I met him when Tiwi and I got a task to make Video of the beauty of Semarang city, where the making of the tiwi video was accompanied by Bagus. It was raining heavily, we finally took shelter at the home of Alya well he was "my best friend". Companions when we first met on MOS.

Alya's house I am the one who serve Good to eat,
"Hey om, ya loh already did not get a meal. He had not eaten yet, eat first. If not means not respect me ". Haha, that's what I said to nice with om calls.
"Yes momentarily", he replied but still busy with playing his game,
"Heh, cepet not om. If you do not really appreciate me ", I started yelling at him, haha. I'm a person who might get angry when something I do is not appreciated by others. Haha, Tiwi and my two friends Alya and Lia were just laughing at me. After I snapped at him he finally obeyed my words. Once in a while after eating my best friend had boasted his talk to me about Angga. Haha yah know when I was like Angga. He's my friend when smp.

Time went on, my day is always accompanied by good in sms, he never said do not sampek Tiwi know if me and Bagus connect via sms. Surely Tiwi will be angry, but Tiwi also introduce me to Bagus. When Good Times once told me,
"Auntie, Tiwi said she said I tuh fit with you" the chatter via sms.
"What? I match with you? Not wrong why do you have to appeal to yourself with each other? I hate it most. "I said with a shocked tone and a little angry, know I was the most like baseball-bandingin like that.

Ever since the time I met Good time ago it was my feeling a little different with him. I feel like falling for her. But I realize Tiwi thinks of me as her sister and Bagus means my sister's boyfriend is herself. I tried to deceive my feelings and tried to bury them deeply. Immediately in the month of february 2014 precisely, there happened an event that made my feelings mixed up. Well, what do you know? Good to express his feelings to me through a short message, well me? I was instantly dumbfounded.
"Tente I can be honest baseball?" He said to me.
"Well, what's om?" I replied briefly.
"From the first I know your diligent diligent behavior towards homework, I am amazed, you are beautiful, sweet, diligent, solehah, wearing hijab again. I fell in love with you ".
"What what? Haha, that's just amazed right? Haha udahlah do not joke, thanks aja already praised him. "I say laugh while laughing, I thought" strange thing ".
"Baseball aunt, bener I like you." He continued
"Haha, yes dech thanks aja yah om. But you belong to Tiwi, she's my friend. "I reminded her.
"Hmm, yeah, but Tiwi is different with you," he replied.
"Husst udahlah not be discussed" I replied.

Since that word we are getting closer. He also told me the same, that I already diceritain to his mother, and his mother agreed to me, and his mother also said after we graduate from this vocational I will be proposed by Bagus. I do not know whether it is true or not is he who knows.

I had time to meet Good in the Garden near my house. It was Saturday afternoon, after school. I lied to my best friend, I said that that afternoon I went with Anga, but the fact that I meet ya Bagus girlfriend my friend. Monday arriving at school I was excited even my class picket who clean all. Haha, my friends laugh at me, they wonder tumben very well I like that usually I wrote like galaknya tiger.
"Heh kak, tumben very diligent really swept all over again" chirp trischa against me.
"Haha wes anyway you kih diem o aja, today I am again very happy, yesterday finished diapelin." I replied cheerfully.

When the break arrived, I started my selfish, I was also entitled to Good, I also ventured to ask for a certainty. Because I had a good sms reading on Lia's tab saying that she wanted Tiwi to change.
"Heh om. Who do you actually choose? Me or Tiwi ?, answer honestly. "I say with selfishness.
"Hmm, I'll answer". He said
"Huh, but when do Iapannya now". I snapped.
"Huh, I've promised". The answer again
"Oh yes already promise will choose TiwI ya? Yes udah not bother you anymore. LONGLAST YES ". I replied.
But after that the message smku baseball rewarded good. And what happened upon arrival back from school, I saw Bagus pick up Tiwi in front of the school. And worse still I see with my own eyes Tiwi dibonceng by Bagus. Oh God, what's this? is this disaster moreover? in my heart crying. As if given a happiness on a high cliff then immediately my happiness was dropped from the cliff. Shattered to pieces even scattered and fluttered.

Since the incident after school I started to move away from Tiwi, even as I usually sit in front of him now I sit on the bench tip and cross with him, because what? When I look at him like I see a wound. And I'm also wrong, why I can not keep my heart baseball, why I also have to like and dissolved in his words Good, how stupid I am.

The longer Tiwi became aware of my bizarre behavior and quirky nature, Wednesday after school she asked me to meet and discuss the matter. Well. The saying goes "as clever as we can keep carcasses will smell too". Again and again I know from a short message from Tiwi in Lia's hp. Tiwi says that Bagus is like that to me just to test how much I am patient. O God suffering much less? I'm holding back the emotions but eventually overflowing. I pulled Tiwi's hand and I threw my hapku into the street. Praaakkk! Shattered to pieces like I felt at the time. There was a great debate. Well I once again also knew that I was also wrong, but Tiwi was also wrong. Taukah, he knows that I'm only a trial material. But why did Tiwi and Amel know that did not immediately tell me ?. God, again and again is always haunted by the hurt.

I told Tiwi, that I think Good is the best. In fact I regret ever saying he's the best. The wound that 1 year ago was almost dry had to open again. Why? because I had never decided my boyfriend just when I was birthday. And now Bagus is almost repeating the wound, but now it's just the 1st month to the happiness I'm waiting for, I hope that by my birthday I can feel the real happiness instead of the million wounds I get. Finally there was a decision, me and Tiwi both lost contact with good. I agree.

In the end I was still in touch with Good, but I know he who has opened the wound in my heart, but somehow I can not stay away from him. Because since the problem I was often sick and my weight continues to decline. Until now I have to be tormented with injuries and sickness. He apologized to me and said that he would make me happy again. Well, though not as perfect as it used to be. And now every time I come back accompanied by him. After a while, he once told me.
"You are not cheated and PHP I am?" He asked me.
"Wa ?, baseball is enough me who hurt, do not others so I can not revenge with you". I replied and assured him.
"Okay prove if you do not like that, change first."
"Okay, not proof if I change". With the swift tears streaming down my cheeks I say it to Bagus.

Not dry my wound, I am sometimes remembered the problem was again hurt and almost relapsed my illness. Truly strange, and should say like me, because I've been hurt. And I'm afraid he'll repeat his mistake first. But I kept convincing myself and thinking positively. It crossed my mind to ask him to come to my house just as I was birthday. But, I doubt I'm afraid it's the same as it used to be what my ex's did to me. Decided me right on my happy day. I heartily told her.
"Tomorrow the 19th coming to the house ya ?." My door to him.
"Yes". The short answer made me slightly disappointed.

After that our short message ends. It turns out my fear will he leave me right. And stay away, 01 03 2014 at 5:53 pm he's for no reason to call me, but unfortunately not answered by me. Behind the disms without any answer. I began to live this life myself, and rushed with the wound. From that day on, he no longer told me. I started thinking to live this life myself, and opened a new page for the happiness of 19 March and the happiness of my life.

Although sometimes I think if yes? He re-test my patience ?. Hmm, I do not know just god knows about all this. And now I go away from the shadow and the shadow of it. Trying to treat and open new pages again in my life. Because my life is still long and my future is still wide.