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I don't have to react to everything that bothers me...

Inspired by an article that I read just now because there was much truth to the article. You know how sometimes you just get the revelation of things when u come across a relatable article that speaks to you? It was pretty timely that I read this because I needed it now more than ever. It speaks to my most inner soul because it pushes and challenges me to 'let certain things go'. Coming from an INTJ personality type, some of these things are pretty hard to do, which I will share later. It was relatable, and it helped me realized that I don't have to react to EVERYTHING that bothers me...

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Photo by Paul Gilmore on Unsplash

I'm slowly learning that I don't have to 'win' everyone or everyone's hearts for that matter. Because let's face it, a lot of them wouldn't even care as much as you do. This wasn't the first time this insight of me 'trying to win' everyone's heart was brought up to me. About a few years ago when I was still leading the youth in church, as a leader, I was very afraid that people wouldn't follow me or my advices because what good would a leader be without any followers right? So when every situation arises, I tend to 'over-explain' myself so that people would understand my side and perspective on why I do what I do. But the reality is, it won't make people suddenly respect you or change their minds. I just had to learn to let go.

I'm slowly learning that not reacting to something that bothers me most often makes me the bigger person. And this is hard because a lot of INTJs including myself tend to overthink when reflecting and when we get cluttered in thoughts, we would always most often jump to the ultimate question, 'maybe I'm the one at fault?' 'Maybe I wasn't good enough?' 'Maybe I made a mistake here or there?'. A lot of maybes...

Rising above it all especially the battle of thoughts with myself will definitely help me have a more joyful day. Because at the end of the day, people might not even blink at your existence.

I'm slowly learning that I don't have to tie all loose ends. I was taught that everyone needed to have closure on things and that isn't always the case. Sometimes the situation just forcefully avoids getting that closure. So it is OKAY to let things go. I won't be everyone's cup of tea and they wouldn't treat me how I want them to so it is OKAY to see past that and spend my energy on my own wellbeing and shift focus to people who truly matter.

I'm slowly learning that being emotional over people that upset you just gives them power over you. And it's not like they care even. Though I can't control what they feel about me or what they think of me, I can, however, have COMPLETE control over my own thoughts and how I would like to perceive things because most often, these situations say a lot about that person and nothing about you.

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Photo by J W on Unsplash

Compassion

With all that said and done, I'm still learning to have compassion which is the lack of what the world needs today. Even though the article did focus a lot about my own self being and to sometimes be selfish about things, I always believe what separates me and the rest out there is compassion.

Compassion is to be able to look pass your own pain, to see the pain of others.

Why they do what they do? Why do they react when certain things don't go their way. It is no doubt hard to practice compassion especially on people who have no space for you in their life but I guess that's where true compassion comes. I know some would disagree with me and some would agree but don't worry, I'm not stupid also to give in to be taken advantage of. There will be limits set to how far I'm willing to give things a shot but when it gets blatantly clear, I wouldn't have to react anymore.

Thank You

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_{Credits to @pinstory & @coloringiship for this lovely photo of me.}

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Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://zord189.steemblogs.club/2019/12/06/personal-thoughts-im-not-your-cup-of-tea-and-thats-okay/

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