Why society is lying to you on a subconscious level

in #life7 years ago

I hate the term society. It's like this big umbrella word that neatly categorises most people in my County, or Country into little pigeon-holes; a huge invisible sway of people judging and forcing us to fit into their own personal categories and rules. I silently gave most friends and family the middle finger a few years back. They told me that to be successful in this world I had to have a family and earn bread for that family by having a job. I hear it countless times from other people in my situation; the utter disrespect they receive when going it alone. If it's something like this, cryptocurrency, and not within the normal parameters of what others perceive as natural and healthy then it's not generally understood. When people don't understand they tend not to try and understand but make it their mission to desperately help you. It's what happened to me. Ridiculed and jeered as I was given the aversion therapy they thought I needed to get back into normal thinking.

Suck it, friends

I loved the day when I showed my mate the first $10,000 I made. It didn't compute, and it wasn't long before we weren't friends anymore. Luckily, I'm left to my own devices now by my family, happy that I'm making it on my own and winning the bread for my own family. Very few understood though, or even wanted to understand what it was that I'm up to. I tell other friends about Crypto currency and the almost zero balance you can walk in with, but alas, it's too intelligent stuff for them, or at least that's what they want to believe (or have been told).

I answered a question for a panicked woman on Quora, once. I like Quora it makes me seem somewhat intelligent. She was worried what people may think of her because she didn't want to have children in her life. It struck me hard, really, that question. My first thought was, who the hell does anyone think they are telling someone that their own personal choice in life is wrong? Who the fuck are they? It set me on a train of thought and I concluded that it was, again, this big over-arching society bullshit. For me the choice should have been up to her, right? Her life and her rules. No-one else’s, no matter how big or small or influential. Society has a way of weeding its way into our thoughts like such. As a man, society tells me that I need to go to college and be successful and work for 'the man' it tells me I need to be Married and have kids and work until I'm half dead. Well, I say fuck society. I'll do it my way.

Schools & Obedience

Schools have it wrong. Schools teach us to be subservient. There are great teachers in this world don't get me wrong; I personally know a few of them, but schools teach obedience and students are rewarded for that obedience. I have, and always will be a leader. That's why School was shit for me. I grew up looking out for the 'big man,' that his ideas and opinions were solid and Godlike, and that I shouldn't question them. My failing in earlier life was always seeking the leader. I was taught to follow, and sometimes like a lemming, before I knew it I was on the rocks with my neck snapped, battered and bloodied from the fall as I punched every rock with my face on the way down. I don't think everyone is a leader though. Some were born to lead, others to follow. It's when you teach everyone to follow is when you have a problem.

I was a leader in sheep’s clothing. I was a man that stumbled through life always thinking that there was something better for me, always thinking that I should be worth something, always thinking there should be a crowd following me. When I would get drunk out of my mind I was always one for making a public exhibition. A leader that's only following is sometimes the hardest burden to bare, and yet, so many of us are that way. You can spot leaders in sheep’s clothing everywhere. Those are the ones you see in McDonalds, and as waiting staff, underperforming, always wondering what else is out there. I'd love to say tag someone you think as a leader here to get the conversation rolling but I feel most of us here are. Perhaps in a few years we might be considered as pioneers of the content revolution, who knows?

Peer pressure = society

Society is pressure. That's all it is. The pressure to fit into some weird zone of normality that no-one really fits into. We all strive for this weird zone. To be better, to look better, to be more fanciable, to be liked, to be loved, to belong. I've wrote constantly how we are far similar than we are different, and part of that I think is to do with the human need to belong, mixed in with our hard-to-grasp consciousness on globalism. We rarely think in terms of humanity. We think of female, or male. Male homosexual, or female cisgender. Black male atheist with gender issues, or Hispanic female Christian with sympathy for Islam. The list goes on. Humanity is one constant though.

I completely reject society. By that I don't mean that I sit holed up in my house with a shotgun quietly whispering to passers-by, "move along now," no. I mean it has no influence on me. I'm not interested in 'keeping up with the Jones’s' if my mate buys himself a well-earned new sports car then fantastic. That's awesome for him. I won't though, my family car fits my needs for now. Try pressure me into anything and watch how badly you fail. My days of trying to fit in and belong are long gone. My next venture will be hiring people, so I'm excited about that!

What about you? What are your thoughts?

Thanks for reading!

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Society or the "people" in general term is indeed an enslaving word. I hate when in parliament democracy countries some politicians in their speech use the word: people. Society is more complex, but the people gives me a populist-detector. Both words are surely something that needs to be more defined in our personal and collective mental vocabulary in the future.Thanks for this article!

Very much agree. We are individual at the core, no two the same. The terms society and normal are bullshit

I started on steemit a few days ago and since the beginnig i didnt understant it but i apply cuz i could see the potential. I show my friends the laugh at my face. I am into crypto and valuable information trade. Sometimes i feel alone but then i open steem and i just start talking with raddom people... connectivity is soo cool between people overwhere.. i stop using face.. this just make soo much sense.... keep posting great staff.. following bro!🤞

It's fun, isn't it? :)

Oh yes it is!!!! The only bad thing i miss all my friends birthdays🤣🤣🤣

Maybe that's something to ask the admin team!

I agree with you 110 percent @raymondspeaks. We are different individuals and have our different views of life. I spent !ost of my childhood days like you trying to fit in. People see and think that they know what is best for you and have an opinion on how you should live your life. I believe that life is a shared experience of different perspectives as said by someone wise. We should each be given the chance they way we feel, make our own mistakes and learn from them. The most important experience in life is happiness and we must each find our happiness any way we can.

I agree with that very much! Who are we to judge, right? Too much time spent on looking into other people's problems when we should really be sweeping up our own shit from the doormat

Yeah. In my neighbourhood for instance people poke their noses into stuff which usually do not concern them. If you keep to yourself, they'll have a problem with you. I believe that our actions affect others directly or indirectly but we should not live our lives pleasing other people. Life is too short for that.

Ah, dude, you're beginning to speak like me now. People have accused me of trying to people please in the last year, and it's not because I am trying to please them, or that I agree with them, but we all have to live together, you know? Why be a dick when you don't need to?

Okay, I'll be following you it looks :)

I hope that we become good pals. I'll be reading more of your post

Me too, with you! :)

consumerism in this country is out of control. So many trying to "keep up with the Joneses" by buying more stuff that they totally miss out on the important things. just my humble opinion.

I have ex friends that buy a new car every year to 'stay ahead' of the Joneses. Sad, really.

I agree with this post 100%. There is so much pressure in society to fit into a box of the normal standard of living, that anything outside of the box or hard to understand is deviant and needs to be cured or fixed. Problem is now societal opinions of 'normal' are hard to determine that individual's are struggling to conform...... a lot of people are losing their identity because they force themselves to be a person that fits in, but the lines are so blurred.... its difficult to determine how to do that..... schools teach conformity and reinforce the need to fit into a box of normality. Great blog!!!! Xxxx

Thank you :)

Live your life on how you want to live it, not by society views how you should life your life or what is considered to be "acceptable." Of course, we should live our lives on a moral and ethical standard. Great post!!

Keep it up! and yes the money here will keep u a nice person like u sed to get PISSED at peope for being trump haters or beiging up <SM lies like the russia hacking tehelction and shit as if russia is that powerful when russia has the GDP of italy and canbarely run their own country ahha

anyway npw i fuckin stay callm and im like damn ima chi; and make sure i dont poiss people off so i can retain maximum rewards and honestly its better for everyone!

when i do have crtiicis, i alway make a compliment sanwich (somethinv i learrnd from Stewei on Family guy as he mimics a corporate asshole, its probly some Sigma Six corporate vooodo bullshit but ya compliment sandwich, u complicmet a post, then u give ur criticism, nd then another compliemnt, it just helps peoples egos not get caught up, its crazy pw much ur ego canjust g off onjust a llil post if someone really sticks it to you nd pushes ur button and u dont even realize how theyre TRYINg tod o that like those gguys n the telegra, chat hahaha

We call that the feedback sandwich in the UK. It's basically a psychological trick to give criticism without hurting feelings. I do it without thinking haha. It's also good character building too. You can use it anywhere in life!

Thank you :)

Interesting piece. I certainly agree with you on schools. They serve only to foster mindless obedience to authority, but seem to have utterly failed with many of the people here on Steemit.

I can't say I've ever felt any pressure from society to act in a certain way and I think I might legitimately claim to have 'gone it alone'. Maybe I have rejected society, i don't know, but I certainly haven't ever felt the need to seek its permission or approval.

There you go then. You're already awesome :)

Raymond speaks the truth!

I say it like I see it :)

Preaaach! I'm so glad Raymond speaks right now, haha! Upvoted!

Thank you :)

o weeee epic content right there buddy. thanks for that got my juices going

Good. Really glad it did, thanks :)

absolutely bud no problem. keep doing great things

That one's a thinker. You covered a lot. I bet it was cathartic, though. So much of this post sounds like my partner. I'm tempted to go read it to him, but I already know he won't even look up from his computer and he'll say he's busy. He gets tired of the whole 'being judged' thing too...but, who doesn't.
And you're so right that it seems most schools teach children to be obedient. Perhaps they are the lucky ones, those kids who learn to be obedient. I was taught to question things, to test limits, to explore ideas. It hasn't worked out so well. Apparently, I'm not a good peasant. too uppity.

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Personally, I don't have a problem with the word, 'society'. Perhaps you could offer an alternative term?

funny you brought it up... i always questioned everything as a child. It used to drive both my parents and i(when they didn't have an acceptable answer) batshit crazy... it became worse when i entered school. Not only did teachers enjoy answering questions about the very subject they were teaching, but my peers didn't understand the necessity to ask questions. They simply were afraid that if they rocked the boat they would recieve more homework..

Nicely said. I answer every single question my son has for me because of that.

social matrix! :P

Scary, yet true!

It was cathartic!! :) Um, fear induced obedience? ;)

i upvoted !!! i always think that school are obsolete

Thank you! I wish they would empower and inspire rather than 'contain'

good man. i reject society too ;) i live offgrid in nature but ongrid in comms! :)

I envy that! I lack the survivalist knowledge to do such. I would, though

oh trust me i'm not as survivalist as i want to be. but i did shut the door on bank accounts, direct debits and all that guff a long time ago. i don't do phone calls just data. i'm learning all the time.

Damn man. That's really smart.

society: the aggregate of people living together in a more or less ordered community.
The only thing we can do is realize that we are prisoners. Freedom can only be completely achieved in solitude!

Society tells us that we need to be different, but not to different, then we'll only end up being bullied.
And we then get taught to listen to what others might think about us and how we behave, then we realize we have to break those patterns to remain sane.
We are living in a sick and twisted society, that's for sure! We cannot win either way. Just live life and enjoy it as much as possible :)

Great thoughts! My sentiments exactly :)

Right on dude, hit the nail dead center!!got to the middle and had to stop, I was like whoah... am I reading what I wrote or is this something online I'm reading.... so many very similar and exact things in my life too! my other half thinks I have a problem, as all I wanna do with my working time now is devour educational videos (and sometimes more so just who-rah vids, but who doesn't eh!) all having to do with crypto though... There are a few more that feel like us, forsure! but Ive adopted the fuggem mentality... "oh, your friend didn't like your idea..." "FUGGEM!" I want to keep on learning as much as I an until that day comes where I can stand in front of the people who are the closest to me who think this is all rubbish and say here... look at what I did... I cant wait for that day! Keep up the awesome work, will be there one day, you just watch!!!

That's the right attitude. My wife supported me but she didn't 'agree' with it. If that makes sense? She kept on saying things like, "ok, this is 6 months now, shall we try looking for a job now?"

Seems to be FULLY supportive now though!! ;)

Haha good, so I know I have things to look forward and up to :) good luck with everything mate!! one day when i make it, ill look back on these, look you up and say hey... we were right when most others were wrong!!!

Please do :)

Excellent post, for one more time! The need to belong is what helped us humans survive and evolve, but it's also what's constraining us on developing individual skills and mind-sets.

I believe that the dichotomy between leaders and followers is a false one. Perhaps a better definition would be people with developed critical analysis skills vs people who still function on the autopilot. Critical thinking skills or a wish to develop them can be triggered by different sources such as environment, experiences, education etc, there might even be some genetic predisposition for "restlessness"; however, these skills can always be practiced if one wishes.

Remember that you are not "you", but the sum of the experiences and life events that led you to be born and become who you are. Just a small event interrupting the chain and you would be an entirely different person. That's why there are no born-leaders and born-sheep or people born-to-do anything specific for that matter.

I get your point though. I'm just like you. Non-conformist and way too analytic, with an unavoidable impact on my social life. But surprisingly, I'm way more confident now than I used to be when I was trying to "fit in". And I meet way more interesting people. There are always people who think more like you, and you can only find them if you narrow down your search...

I'd love to debate with you on this. I've worked with people in the past that have been kicked in the face repeatedly by those that should bring them up and not slap them down. I always see that glint in their eye, that potential, that something waiting for me to grab hold of inside of them and make it shine. If one was shat on for most of their life, and going by what you just said, wouldn't it hold true that they would just be happy to exist? I'm not too sure, I see that glint in a few people I meet.

On the other hand I sort of disagree with myself. I knew there was something more for me by having an extended family that lived far better lives than we did. So I knew for certain there was better out there. I don't know. What are your ideas? I was a council estate kid getting drunk and smoking dope in my teens. I had no interest in Politics, or anything for that matter, apart from my next hit!

Well, there is no generic rule of the kind of "people who go through hardships or get rejected are more likely to be happy where they are", but there is an important factor to note here and this is the comparison factor.

The human mind puts things on perspective based on comparisons. You might have noticed people who were born and raised in poor communities of Africa or Asia, for example, that they seem to be smiling all the time. This is because most people in their community are more or less equally poor. People that are unhappy with their current financial (or other) situation are people who are surrounded by people who are, or are considered to be, better off. A person who makes 90K per year is rich and lucky for the standards of a lower middle class community, but he will consider himself to have failed if he lives between millionaires.

We tend to fall in a form of survivorship bias, a logical error of concentrating on people or things that are successful and compare ourselves to them only, completely forgetting about the ones that have failed due to their lack of visibility. Nassim Nicholas Taleb describes it well in his book Fooled by Randomness (he makes excellent points by the way - I recommend reading his books) in the following example.

You might have seen people who lived better and subconsciously compared yourself to them or wanted to somehow reach them. You might have had enough trouble as a kid to turn you into an independent and restless person as a means to keep coming up with ways to survive on your own. There is definitely more than one single clear influence, it's always a combination, complicated enough to make each person who ever existed on earth, unique.

Another point I would like to make: Being dissatisfied with our current state and constantly striving for something better is what allowed us to survive as a species, but in this case it's not always the best for our emotional stability. Appreciating what one has, even the small things, does not necessarily equal to them being sheep. Similarly, always living with the anxiety of becoming successful does not mean that one is a leader. It often just means they care too much to prove themselves. The key to living a happy life is for people to go their own way without comparing themselves to others. One has to find a balance between being too content to be bothered to change anything in this world, and being too dissatisfied to be able to appreciate anything because the neighbor has it better.

I actually agree with everything you said there. It makes total sense really.

I feel really content with what I have, I feel happy that my efforts in life have blessed me with a really comfortable lifestyle. That doesn't mean I'm content to stay the same as I am though. I'm always looking for better. Whilst this Steemit platform writing is going well for me I've just hired a marketing agency to thrust my website into the limelight and start seeing some well needed sales. I will always strive for better, and I will always appreciate what I have, because I know that it could go southward at any moment :)

When I started to strive I always felt I had something to prove, I always felt that I needed to best my friends at what they were doing because almost always I was the one lagging behind. Now I feel I have nothing more to prove because my friends are eons behind, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop! I'm also certainly never going to forget where I came from and the toxic mindsets that lead into that system!

Trying to fit into society came and went in my twenties. It's a lot of work trying to fit in and all you get out of it is a hollowed out self, loathing what you've become, following the herd towards the next politically acceptable activity.

Screw that. Be yourself. Find your own path and own your life!

Keep on speaking!

I very much agree :)

"As a man, society tells me that I need to go to college and be successful and work for 'the man' it tells me I need to be Married and have kids and work until I'm half dead. Well, I say fuck society. I'll do it my way."

Couldn't have been said any better. I realized now that most people don't get or understand and do not want to understand what we do as far as cryptocurrency is concerned. Until it is literally smacking them in the face, maybe then they will get it. Funny, I was just having a conversation with my good friend this week about how when we were younger we always spoke about how in the future if we ever made boatloads of money all the sports cars and big houses we'd buy. Now, we'd be cool with something that just looks and rides nice and a comfortable place to live, no mansions and all that crap. Not saying a mansion wouldn't be cool or a lamborghini but the idea just doesn't drive us that crazy anymore. Society will always be society, to me, a controlled experiment that's gone way too long and now literally no way out even if you do indeed know the way out. We will somehow always be trapped but more equipped and calculated in our moves than others who decide to just go with the program. Damn, life is short..

Ohh. That was refreshing to hear. Yep. I wanted a huge house with a team of people to wipe my bum. Now? Happy with what I have really. Yup, I do know the way out but I'm still trapped in a room full of people in chains.

deep stuff dude, peace.

I like to think. I often wonder if that's good or bad haha

This is great , and very much true . We get stuck on the term that what will people say or people think , we live in a society where one day can be bright and sunny while the next day is dark and sunny . No one is ever really happy with our success because it's not them , we should be happy for the person and ask god to help you see that day one day too. Jealousy kills my friend

You're right, it does. Jealousy is such a bad emotion. I prefer empowerment :)

Wish everyone could just be happy for one another . Maybe one day ! (:

I rejected society a long time ago. Off grid is the way to go. Less hassle and less of the bull factor. Thanks.

Awesome! I'm jealous haha.

Hi
I wish you the best
What jobs are you offering?
I saw you will be hiring people
I'm your new follower
Best Regards Andrei

Thanks Andrei, not too sure yet. I will go where the tide of change takes me I guess!

You welcome
Then I wish you good luck in everything you want to achieve
Best wishes

Great Stuff! I upvoted and followed you!

Thank you! Much appreciated :)

Excellent Post!

I completely agree with all of your points. This world is an illusion. When you wake up to reality, it's impossible to go back to the illusion.

School really programs the illusion into us at a young age. It's not difficult to see that the education system is completely flawed, however, if you were to tell that to a school teach (and most students) they would look at you as if you were speaking a different language.

"Society" is structured in a way to keep humanity in a zombie-like state. The majority of people let them selves go. They fall into the illusion and do what is needed to get by. There is no purpose. They are wasting their lives. That's what the illusion is in place to do, destroy life.

Those that fail to wake up are going to be skimmed away in the near future. We've been warned "subliminally" our entire lives. Only the strong survive.

Soon technology is going to put an end to "jobs" and the "weak" will be completely useless at that point in time.

I treat my life as if it were a game and I'm determined to reach higher levels.

Ah, great post. You're right, a super scary reality but so close to the future it's undeniable.