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RE: Incursion

in #life2 years ago

Throughout reading this, i can't help but constantly think - I hope Boom wiped his ass!

Ironically I see traces of William Shatner, left behind by aliens, and I don't think they are poking fun at all of us. Just you, in response to a whiff that might be coming from you (as a result of you not wiping) - which kinda confirms my suspicions.

The ship looks pretty cool, though and all the life force inside. Except for the bench.It looks itchy, but now that I think about it, might have been strategically placed there (for you) as another opportunity to wipe.

But what do i know - I'm probably just reading to deep into your shit (sorry, could not resist the opportunity)

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I WIPED!!! Whoe doesnt? After all if you don't, it gets that dry cotton wooly way and make squeaking noises when you walk or shift in your seat.

So I have heard...

Imagine wiping your arse on someones good wooly bench, the ultimate contempt! HA!! :OD

Bahwhaha! Pics or it didn't happen! (Disclaimer: this statement was purely made for the laugh. The author of said statement has now or ever really wanted to see pics of an unwiped ass. She gets enough of those visuals when changing diapers)

Lol that bench is actually quite hideous (not looking, it looks meek and harmless, but give me all kinds of bad feels), purely because it makes me itchy just looking at it. I feel like I'm breaking out already. Wiping asses on it would be an improvement. Lol.

Send the usual 25$ to unwipedhassage@gmail.com. The pics will be with you within the hour!

I didn't like the idea of sitting on the bench for thinking of all of the other unwashed folks that might have previously sat on it! lol

LOL i dont blame you!

Funny kinda related story. The kid is potty training and we on the final hurdle. Getting her to do number 2 in the potty and not her pull-ups. In an attempt to speed things up i took a pic of her mess as it spilt out and was quite a site. thought it would gross her out. She just became obsessed with pic and wanted to show everyone. (and she didn't even ask for 25$). I obvs deleted it after I showed her. Kids man. Biggest Weirdos!

They are! My boy potty training wanted me to take photos of every poo that he got in the toilet and was dead proud and I am like, dude, I don't want to take photos of your shit!?!?

Mental! But hilarious! Gotta love these weirdos!

There is nothing weirder than a kid at that age! 🤣