How do they feel?
The Optomaton brandished a mirror at me with a self-satisfied air. He had peculiarly bendy thumbs which made the spines on my back bristle with distrust.
Who knew what crevices such thumbs had plumbed?
Despite my distrust of his heinous digits, I looked in the little mirror he offered and turned my head this way and that as if a cheap chiropractor had just given me one of their shonky adjustments.
Mmm, are they squint?
I murmured hesitantly.
The Optomaton frowned and nudged my face toward him with one of his bendy thumbs.
No no, no. No. Nooo. No, I don't think so.
He palmed the mirror at me again and I looked into its depths.
I had just been fitted for new glasses which were a different style to the ones I had been wearing for the past four years. What with lockdown and all that Covid shit, I had skipped a few eye appointments.
Now, I sat looking at my new glasses in his little mirror.
Maybe it was because they were new. Maybe it was because I was getting old and stuck in my ways.
Maybe, It was a mild hangover tickling at the base of my self-esteem.
But I wasn't sure I liked them. They were rounder than my old ones. They dipped downward like an old vegan's bottom.
Definitely not squint. Straight as a die. Straight as an arrow. Straighter than... um, straight.
The Optomaton stuttered to a halt and I mentally sneered at his lack of wordery.
I examined myself once again in the fucking oversized spoon the Optomaton used as a mirror.
I was not entirely convinced but what could I do. Sometimes you have to embrace change like it's an Elephant that has rampaged through the clearing you set up your illegal still in and just roll with it.
Aye ok, Thank you. I will take em.
I nodded grimly to myself. Fuck it. I could do with a change and anyway, indecision is for the weak.
I picked my shit up and tipped an imaginary hat at Bendy-Thumbs the Optomaton.
If you need anything adjusted, just pop in and let us know!
He called out, somewhat desperately.
I'll crack the jokes bumthumbs.
I muttered, hitting the door with my hand and stepping out into the brisk chill of a Scottish summer.
I drove home, occasionally risking death by trying to look at myself in the mirror as I went.
The glasses were growing on me, I thought I had made a good choice. Mentally I patted myself on the back. Another job well done Mr Boom and no one had had to die in an inferno of screaming lizards and wildfire.
Today was looking up.
As I arrived home to my loving family my spirits were back up at the usual 3000%. I looked the fucking bomb in these new specs. I couldn't wait to see the family's reaction when they saw them.
I braced myself as I opened the front door for their amazement and wonder at this handsome and distinguished gentleman who was entering their lives.
Guys, I'm home!!
I stepped into the lounge and threw my arms wide.
Whatdya think dudes!
I grinned at the children and my beautiful amazing Good Lady. Readying myself for their praise and adulation,
Daddy, you look like Harry Potter!
Yelled the Little Lady with delight.
Blumming heck so you do! Harry Potter!
The Good Lady guffawed and clapped her hands.
I looked at them all in disbelief.
Harry fucking Potter?!? Fuck you guys.
Indeed.
At 52, I'm still struggling with change - but at least my eyesight is reasonably okay. after a hard day and in low light I struggle to read, and in the supermarket I find myself taking a photo of the ingredients and enlarging it on my phone, but I'm still refusing to put glasses in my bag as MY EYESIGHT IS NOT DETERIORATING, THANKS VERY MUCH!
But maybe I need to put on my big girls blouse and go to Specsavers.
Oh the low light and close up stuff, what a fecking nightmare. Pick up a can of beans and want to check the ingredients and looking at it from all sorts of angles! Lol, its murder. I mentioned that in that very shop and they asked if I wanted reading glasses. I unceremoniously said, no thank you! I have a bit of life left in me yet! :OD
Perhaps, they were speaking about Hairy Potter. Flowing locks, glorious glasses!
Heh heh!! Hairy Potter would have been much nicer! Dang he suits it! I should be so lucky to have such luxurious locks! :OD
TooMuch lmfaaao
The best part about bad glasses? You can see how bad you look.
That's my shitty glasses joke. It's really shitty.
It's not it's full of the deep wisdoms!!
That was my thinking when I tried them on and could see everything in sparkling detail including unfortunately, the glasses on my face!
Does the song I Can See Clearly Now come to mind every time you put your glasses on?
It used to, but it got rapidly replaced by that Top Gun one with the dum da dum da duuuummm, da ruuumm, da dummm, da dum!
Did you know having that Sunglasses at night song stuck in your head for decades is a great reminder of when to take them off?
I might not have known but I probably will now as it is stuck in my head and no doubt will be for years 🤣
It seems Optomaton's meal portion is not normal as ours due to the spoon :)
Big for a spoon small for a mirror. Dinners must be fun in his house!!! :0D
When making a change, family support is important, lol! However, the spontaneous question that arises is: Do you have an illegal distillery and you're not saying anything? This matter should be kept secret from authorities and lizards but communicated to our allies in the reptilian war! I was thinking of starting to brew my own beer, but I don't think it can be called an illegal distillery :-)
Anyway, in my opinion, the new glasses definitely don't make you look like freaking Harry Potter... Besides, if anything, he would resemble you more, and he should thank fate for that, don't you think? ;-)
That's a good way of turning it onto it's head! Yes, is there is any resemblance it is he to me. Ha, expeliarmus that Mr Potter!!
I am afraid I can neither confirm or deny the existence of an illegal still...
I'm not asking for any confirmation... you know I could never do that! Anyway, the beer I'll produce will be legal, not for commercial purposes, but consumable among friends... after the initial experiments, I'll try to get you some! (I still need to send you some delicious gift baskets... I haven't forgotten, I'll keep my word and make it up to you with some lovely blondes as well!) :-)
Good lord, never has a paragraph sounded so delightful!!
I love home made beer. The logistics of it might be too tough but I would be game if they weren't 🙂
I have made wine before but never beer which is odd cos I love it!
in the past we have already produced it with some friends, we were able to make 100 liters at a time; sounds complicated but once you buy the right equipment and learn the process is very simple.
Among other things, buying the equipment to produce 33 liters isn't even expensive, with 100 euros you have everything you need; there are special sites that sell everything, even the malts... obviously all legal heh heh!
00 litres!! Hot drink, that is quite impressive!!
I have the room now. I never did before and the kids are slightly more self sufficient than they have been. I think I might give it a go. I have always fancied making some kind of jalapeno beer!!
You can rock pretty much anything if you have enough confidence. That's one thing I particularly enjoy about being our age but sometimes I embarrass my wife. Lol. We have to see a picture of these glasses now!
Haha, you might sort of see them in various post thumbnails. To be honest they don't look much different!
I think I am quite confident in them, they just sideswiped me with such a random thing!!
ain't that some shit? You got yourself all hot and bothered on the car ride home all for them to tell you you look like a kid wizard playing with his stick. Sorry man. I feel for you.
I never denied playing with my stick!! 🤣🤣
It could be MUCH worse ! He could have talked you into the giant glasses that look like a prize from a carnival game, like they have talked so many people into over here. I've never seen so many people look ridiculous because of their glasses in my whole life, and that's a LONG time. Sometimes people need to just say NO to the current fashion. LOL
It is good to have a family with humor. Changes do take time to become normal again.
Do you know, it's weird, giant glasses are a thing now. It took me ages to find a pair that were not like dustbin lids. They were all giant. I nearly had to look in the teenagers section for some that weren't!!
I do love the humour, especially when it makes me speechless. It's not easy done!
I don’t mind getting new glasses but I for sure make sure that I stay away from the round ones hahaha. Don’t want to look like ol Potter. They will fade away though and get back to normalcy. I think you just need to grab a stick and go to one of those castles you guys got up there and start saying random shit and flicking the stick around, with adding a little pizzazz like throwing some dirt and rocks and you’ll fit right in!
I will take a rock that I have painted golden and start throwing it and bouncing it off people's heads and shouting you've got the snitch! Lol!!
Better to age using John Lennon glasses these are too big, no wonder family blurted Harry frigging Potter at you!
I used to actually have a pair of Lennon style glasses when I was a teenager! I loved the damn things!
I can take being called Potter. Maybe they are just referring to my youthful vibe 🤣
Similar not the same, it the eyes behind!
Names, what's in a name unless you answer....
!BEER time to chill.
Who doesn't love a !BEER on a sunny day. Which it is here for a change!
It's all in the eyes though, that's for sure!
Rose tinted !LOLZ
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🤣🤣🤣 Harry Potter. Nah! I wasn’t expecting that. If mystery and smarty pants look is what you are going for then you have arrived 😅
It will grow on you and on them too- that is what new does or is it change🤔
I think that is what new does!!
They have grown on me already and they have said since that they think they look amazing. They were just teasing me which they like to do because I am such a teaser myself!!
Nice! They beat you at your game. 😁 Family is beautiful 💕
Family sure is. It's good when they can keep you on your feet!
Indeed it is.
Mr. Boom, you are a real tonic, I need to stop here more often!
A debonair Harry Potter, I can just imagine the scene at home, very descriptive!
You should become a scriptwriter for sure, never too late you know.
Or, perhaps the optometrist gave you the wrong strength prescription glasses?
Thanks for the chuckle, as always :)
Hello milady!!
I know what it's like pc this chain, there is so much to see it's easy to skip over stuff!
Hehe, I think a debonair Harry Potter is an amazing thing indeed.
The old scriptwriting, I've of my mates said that too. I should look into it. Far better than boring IT!
Then it's time you got to it, you already have a ton of material right here in Hive!
Although time always is the problem, we just don't have enough hours in the day. Something to seriously consider when you stop your day job!
Have yourself a great week Mr.
PotterBoom.Time really is. I think if the kids weren't so young I would have so much that I would be able to do. I definitely have it in mind to pursue though!!
Now I will get my broomstick 😀
Simile of the year that man! 😁😁
Getting new glasses is frought with danger!! I too am set in my ways and the new glasses need to be very similar to the old or I can't warm to them!
Aye, that's me. I think it is the one safe I am slightly sensitive about!!
This story had me in stitches! From the hopeful anticipation of praise to hilariously compared to Harry Potter by the family, every moment was pure comedy. At such moments we often feel like crying and laughing together. It's a great reminder to embrace change and not take ourselves too seriously. Thanks for sharing this delightful tale that brightened my day.
I am glad you enjoyed it!! 🙂
Harry Potter.. that's fucking funny.. certainly not where I was expecting that story to go.
I didn't expect it either, bastarts that they are 🤣🤣
That picture of yours looks suspiciously like the old glasses (not round enough for Potter). I worked with a bloke who looked like an old 'Harry once.., he was a bit of a cunt. Beware the glasses changing your personality overnight, some are cursed.
I never thought that the glasses could shape the person but you know what, I think you could be on to something!!
Hehe, they ain't that round that's why they flummoxed me. They're not in the slightest bit Potter!
Yet another moniker - harryboom, meesterhairy....bah, stick with meesterboom, it is much better lol. I think those tiny mirrors are done on purpose, you know so that you can only see one eye at a time. They don't want you getting the whole enchilada in one peek lol....bastards
MeesterHarry!
Hahaha, That will be why they have such small mirrors. There is always a reason to what they do!
Ouch! I felt that from here 😂😂😂sorry!
It was a sore one! lol! :O)
So sorry😂😂
I'm recover ;O)
Haha... Their reaction will make you think about your former reaction to the new glasses. Haha. Harry Potter isn't that bad, or is he? 😂😂
Haha, it might not be so bad as just that it was so unexpected! I nearly fell over!! :OD
Haha🤣🤣🤣. Damn. Sorry
You are like magic to your family! And the only reference they had was Arry Pottah. 😎
Damned, that freaking aging. At some point in time space I didn't even recognize myself in the mirror anymore.
Then my other half asked me if it might be cataract. Me acting offended as a result, as this was a thing for very old aged seniors! How dare she even suggest...
Turned out it was. Two surgeries later and I'm cyborg.
Now I can see myself again in the mirror, better than ever before.
But I can't say I recognize the man in the mirror.
Take that HP reference as a compliment mate! As they could have told you that you look like Dumbledore. Now that would have been bad.
Cataracts!! God dang! My old boss had them and when he went in for the op they asked if he wanted them to fix his short sightedness and he was like hell yeah!!
Growing old sucks ass really. I am glad to be potter for the moment!
My eyesight got fixed in the process, which was a huge plus. My eyesight before the surgery was minus. Effectively now both are at zero. Only thing they could not fulfill was my request for X-Ray vision.
And physical degrading due to aging sucks bad indeed. While there is a huge sea of gained knowledge available which could be put to good use if it was inside a 25 year young body.
Now there could be a remark that getting inside a 25 year young body could be arranged, but I feel sorry for the view that must be for the receiving end. Don't think somebody would want to see a drooling pumping grunting Zombie up that close.
Technology already has gotten us very far, so why not invent a regenarative gene injecting thing. Or a brain transplant into a cloned younger body of oneself.
C'mon, now is that so much to ask?
If volunteers are wanted, count me in.
Count me in too!!!
Blummin eck, you got the same thing a him. That's awesome. I am glad it worked out well in the end.
Aye does have its benefits but rarely in the physical kind!
Harry Potter! Did the optoman brandish you with a lightning bolt too?
This sentence made me chuckle!
Them vegans bottoms... 🤣
Fortunately I escaped the lightning... This time!
Hi @meesterboom ,Haaaaaa , Harry Potter , you look very good then haaaaaaa , very intellectual , you better not ask any more , you will surely find different answers
Exactly, sometimes you shouldn't plumb too deep and just escape with what dignity you still have!! :0D
It's not so bad looking like Harry Potter, man. You could have looked like Alastor Moody, haha. Picking glasses is really hard.
If they had shouted moody I would have packed my bags 🤣
It is quite hard, you have to try on loads. The place I got them still has COVID restrictions and you have to put them in a funny box to be cleaned after you have tried them. It all takes a while!
That's really funny. It sucks that Covid is still a problem. I hope I never have to choose glasses and never get made to look like Harry Potter XD
That's the thing it totally isn't an issue anywhere else. Nobody cares except in the glasses place.
Heh heh, I hope too that you never have to be pottered 🤣🤣
Hahaha! 😆
Time for a dual, I say good Sir.
Harry Farter rocks. I'm just about to appease the younger human and actually read the books at last. Having said that... I know three spells just enough to win a Wizarding duel.
p.s. It's not Levyosaaah. It's LeviOHsah!
Expeliarmus!!! Avra kedavra!! There's the only ones I know.
Although with my new found potterness maybe lots more will stick in my head 😀😀
Not allowed and you are officially expelliamused from Hogwarts and the Wizarding world in full. 👀
I don't care how cool your glasses are
I've never been one for the rules 🤣🤣
Oh yeah... right!
Okay then. Protego and double protoego and aseo your wand.
And Protego! Just in case!
See, I had to Google that one. These glasses ain't working!
You should duel against my kid. He knows 'em all by heart.
I had to retire :(
But I'm keeping the robe.
I ain't dueling no master!!! :0)
I'm just a liddle Padawan!
I'll never get any better if you don't train me :/
They are most definitely working. A good story and all!
Hey, at least you made the Little Lady happy! And I'm guessing that you like the glasses, which is what counts...
This post has been manually curated by the VYB curation project
I do like em! I'm fact I love them although I have a fear that they make me look a little too serious when I DGAF!!! 😀
That's a good thing, especially if you aren't listening 🤣
!PIZZA
Imposible to take it serios after the comments hahahaha , cheers bro
I never expect my stuff to be taken seriously. That would be bad! 😀
For sure, i Laught and still is a true post bro i like it hope read more stuffs like this soon from u 🤜🏻🤛🏻
Cheers man. I hope to put some stuff out!! 😜😜
I want invite u to watch ThisPost , before too late is not s funny one.
I will have a look 🙂
Thank you 🙂
181 likes 0 comments where is the interaction, ironically i have nothing to say
Lol, I thought you would visit. The post has been up five minutes. There will be plenty of interaction
for sure there will be interaction we are on hive, and its a high quality post
$PIZZA slices delivered:
@wrestlingdesires(2/15) tipped @meesterboom
Why are you automatically downvoting @amirl's posts?
There is nothing wrong with them and you have not done the courtesy of explaining the downvote.
It was explained a long time ago. Since then he has continued disparaging both hive and individual hive users on Blurt.
I don't believe that that should be rewarded
So this is about something that happened on another chain a long time ago.
It is not about the quality of @amirl's posted content on Hive.
That is abuse of the downvote system and is just as bad, if not worse, for Hive as the original disparagement.
I would ask you to remove these automatic downvotes and judge his and other's contents on its merits.
No. The original events happened on Hive. Check his history. See all the "deleted" comments and posts. If you have time, investigate on the chain what he said and to whom.
This was then followed by him rage quitting to another chain where he disparaged Hive and Hive users.
This is not abuse of the downvote system. My reasoning is as above. I do not have to give a reason but you asked politely so I have.
I shall judge amirl on his conduct both past and present with regard to how I use my downvotes.
Well downvoting a perfectly good post announcing his return to Hive just perpetuates the conflict.
Maybe you should let him make a new start.
I disagree. What has he to offer? He insulted the platform, he insulted other users, he powered down his stake and left telling anyone who would listen that the platform is a scam. (There weren't many)
In fact even today he was pushing the idea that HBD was a scam on another platform. How is that good for hive?
The fact that he was pushing the idea that HBD is a scam on another platform makes me think his post was rather disingenuous and not a perfectly good post
I don't think that kind of behaviour deserves any rewards and that is essentially what it is, a disagreement over rewards.
Apshamilton knows exactly what this is about Boomy, he commented at length and I explained at length. There's the comments below.
https://peakd.com/@amirl/re-apshamilton-5bv8fy
There's not much more to say really, the user, amirl, made his choices a long time ago, decided to delete posts and comments in a bid to mask his behaviours and went away to Blurt to denigrate you, me and others as well as Hive in his typical vitriolic manner...Coming back here and saying he wants to "support the platform" is laughable.
Here's another link showing someone else who tried to talk sense into someone who repels it.
https://peakd.com/@nonameslefttouse/re-amirl-rkb2zd
This user wrote in a comment once about being free to criticize the platform as much as he likes, even citing freedom as the reason...he is of course, and has.
But here's the thing about freedom...Everyone is entitled to it and, just like him others are free to exercise it in any way they choose. Like downvoting.
But you know all of this of course, I guess I just wanted to reiterate.
This all began because amirl posted in my community in dual language and when told about it defaulted straight to hate-speech, abuse and racism, calling me racist, white trash and a Nazi. He could have edited out the other language like everyone else does, but he played a card and the rest is history. It went down hill from there, and I'll not forget it. He best go back to Blurt, considering the things he said about Hive I'm surprised he came back...seems he can't even be true to himself.
Some outside perspective from someone stumbling into this mess then investigating independently, with respect for all parties involved.
Amirl doesn't own his mistakes and it appears to me - based on his behavior this past week - he came here to poke the bear.
This post indicates where his mind was at six days ago as of this writing.
This post indicates where is mind was at shortly after "returning."
Same place. To me it appears he's using those downvotes as fuel for his ongoing smear campaign.
An unnecessary smear campaign stemming from a disagreement you're fully aware of and have been reminded of. I personally witnessed Amirl's deplorable behavior firsthand while trying to reason with him, hoping to help him out of that situation since he was struggling with it on his own, while from my perspective none of his peers were offering assistance.
I agree with you, Andrew, when you hint at the idea you'd prefer to see people move on and put things in the past.
Is he your friend? If so, then it's your duty to point at his share and where he went wrong and ask him to see it clearly, own it, and do better. If he doesn't, all he's doing is renewing the reasons why some here feel he's not welcome, making it current and not in the past, recharging animosity.
Observing him spin this situation back into something where he's playing the victim again rather than owning the mistake he made that started the chain of events (and continues to make) is maddening to an observer such as myself. Now imagine how it must feel for the people who've become direct targets of his smears and well-documented deceitful behavioral patterns.
I have a strong stomach when it comes to these situations, Andrew. I've heard and seen it all and much of me thinks he came here to agitate people. Certainly worked didn't it? I see the commotion it caused. That's not a coincidence. That's exactly what would happen if you replaced all these people with other people and put them in the same boat.
He needs to own his mistake and he needs someone he can trust to be the one guiding him there. Otherwise he'll remain stuck in that loop, following the same pattern that does not appear to be a fulfilling life experience. Correct, the downvotes won't get him there. Neither will taking his side and frowning upon the downvotes. Need to get to the root of the problem rather than focusing on the superficial elements. Someone needs to get through to him. Maybe that's you or maybe you know someone. It certainly isn't me. I already tried, long ago, so it wouldn't come to this, but he refused and doubled down.
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Wow. That's a lot!
Indeed, it is! Receiving over 400,000 upvotes is an impressive accomplishment and a testament to the quality of your content and engagement with the community. Keep up the great work, and you'll surely reach your next target of 410,000 upvotes in no time! 😄