I'm glad to have read this your post. My piece of advise may not be the best, but it will be good if you pay heed to at least a part of it. From experience, as one who have been married for almost 10 yrs now, marriage is not something that should be hurried into. So the first thing will be - take time to chose your partner prayerfully and watchfully. Please, don't take too much time, because those suitors you see today may not wait for you if you decide to take time longer than they would wait. Try to strike a balance regarding waiting time and come to a consensus. Secondly, NEVER MARRY AN ABUSER!!! If you do, you might not be alive to tell your story. My immediate elder sister (Late Mrs. Anthonia Ekeleoseye Tobi, nee Aburime) lived in a very abusive marriage and paid with her life at a very young age of 35 leaving 5 children behind. That ugly incident happened in 2010 (7 years ago). I encouraged her , first child, @tobimarian to join steeemit, although she has not blogged for a day. The kind of advise I would give you, because of personal experience in my 9 year old marriage might not suit you, because the way you view marriage in the South-East is different from the way we view marriage in the South-South where my parents hail from. There are a lot of things that I have ''bottled up'' in marriage, though I've shared with some of my family members. These challenges largely stem from cultural differences. You might want to pay attention to that . In Nigeria, it's tough to marry a man from another cultural background. The next bomb I want to release would be thought of by all as prejudice, but sorry I would not advise you to marry any man who does not have the same social standing. In my opinion, it's better for you to marry a man with a higher social status or at least the same rather than marry a man with a lower social status. Hmm...the day I will start to write my story about the Igbo man I married, steemit will ''scatter''. That is why I am treading carefully. I'm not afraid of what the public will say, because I don't owe them anything. God will give me the wisdom to share my experience, so that others will learn a lesson or two from it. I wish I could talk you on phone. I always prefer talking to chatting /writing. This is the much I can write for now. Cheers.