FEAR OR PHOBIA…

“Always, always, always do the thing you fear, and the death of fear is certain”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

Fear:

Granted most people don't have a favorable opinion of -- fear… But fear is essential in keeping us safe. The most basic human survival mechanism.., that lets us know there could be danger lurking around that corner.., or down that dark alleyway. We've all felt it.., no matter how manly you think you are -- you have had that "Spidey Sense" go off.., when something just outside your radar spooks you…

Without fear.., we would not be prepared to protect ourselves. This primitive emotion has helped to keep us all alive, as a whole, dating back to our earliest ancestors. Past traumas and bad experiences can instill a certain amount of fear.., and when faced with a similar situation -- we say -- "Im not doing that again…" "That scared the hell outta' me last time." or something to that effect. And sometimes, instilling fear.., can get you out of a jam.

Of course, we need to be rational when fear is concerned.., or we would never leave the house. When you're a child, you are scared of the Boogeyman (actually, it's usually our parents that use the boogeyman to scare the shit out of us).., But, we hit a certain age -- and all of a sudden rational thinking has kicked-in.., and we are pretty sure there is no scary dude hiding in the closet, waiting for you to fall asleep so he can kill you… And the fear of the boogeyman, is a thing of the past.

But in the end fear is our friend… Right before anything dangerous happens -- you can feel it, a split second before… And if you are in-touch with your fear, your emotions.., it can be a great advantage in many situations -- and save your ass!

Phobia:

Phobias on the other hand will fuck-up your quality of life. It's one of the things, that makes turns those fears, into phobias. A fear is not a phobia, until it is an irrational fear.., and those do not serve you. As a matter of fact, they can greatly limit, hinder and impede on your life.

For example… When someone says, arachnophobia is the fear of spiders -- they are leaving out the key word -- irrational. It's your irrational fear of spiders. When a fear causes so much anxiety, you start looking for a valium, it s a -- phobia.

And man, oh man -- there are a lot of phobias (Top 100 Phobia List)… Ophidiophobia, Acrophobia, Cynophobia, Astraphobia, Chemophobia, the good old Claustrophobia.., and my favorite Phobophobia -- the (irrational) fear of fear! There are so many phobias -- it's amazing we get anything done…

I am not making light of (maybe a little) anyones phobias… Because when one of them presents itself, it is game on… That fight or flight thing kicks-in, the serotonin in the brain gets going -- and here comes the overwhelming anxiety. And no matter how "irrational..," it is damn real to you… Panic attacks, along with nausea, pounding heart, can't think clearly, sweating -- sheer terror. And people with certain phobias.., will go way out of there way to avoid that specific kind of situation.

Personal Story:Derek Jeter of the NY Yankees used to come into the bar I was working at on Monday nights (the teams night off).., and one of my regulars, a very pretty brunette had her sights set on him… They hit it off, had a great time -- got drunk.., and they left together, to go back to his amazing NYC penthouse apartment. Only problem -- it was on the 88th floor! And this girl had acrophobia -- the irrational fear of heights. She walked away from a night with the captain NY Yankees, a future Hall of Famer… Because there was no-way she was going up in an elevator to an apartment on the 88th floor with floor to ceiling windows -- she was still shaking when she came back to the bar 20 minutes later.., just from the thought of it. Irrational.., but couldn't have been more real to her…

When our fears take that next step into becoming or being a phobia -- we have a problem. People take medication (usually some kind of anti-anxiety meds).., and change there lifestyle. They avoid certain situations. They miss out on life experiences -- who knows, that girl from my bar could be Mrs. Derek Jeter if she didn't let her irrational fear of heights get in her way…

In The End…

Fears and Phobias -- have something in common… If you want to get rid of them, you have to face them… You know, that fear of heights -- jump out of a plane. Afraid of Spiders.., get one as a pet. There are plenty of things out there to be afraid of -- for real. The world can be a scary place… But if we let it, our fear can get the better of us, where it is not warranted… It can and will invade on your quality of life. It breeds inaction and doubt.., and has the ability to destroy creativity and innovation. Master your fear, become comfortable with it.., and you remove obstacles from your life that suck-up your energy. Conquer your fears.., and watch your life soar!

"Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely." -- Buddha


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