Child’s play

How did you do at adulting today? I did some cooking and cleaning, then I engaged in a favorite pastime of most adults - went to the store brandishing my credit card and saying “I want this!” Actually, that’s one of the best parts about adulting, you don’t have to beg your parents when you want something.

If you look up the definition of adult, it says fully developed, fully grown or mature. The first terms clearly relate to physical development, which explains why the age of maturity is defined by reaching a certain age. It’s not like you have to take some test to prove you’re an adult now. How about mature? The dictionary isn’t helpful at all as it takes you back to attaining full development. You also get a synonym like ripe. Well, I guess I am quite ripe, but an adult? I don’t think so.

They say that children learn by playing. Caring for a doll is practice for nurturing their future young. Building a fort in the backyard teaches not only basic construction skills, but also the value of being in a team. After a certain number of years, children are allowed to swap toy guns for real ones, Monopoly money for what passes for money in the grown-ups’ world, ditch the plastic car for something roadworthy, etc.

I’ve been an adult for a long time now, but most days I wonder if I’m not a child playing with fancier toys. I’ve raised two kids, had various jobs, bought a house, decorated and redecorated, and opened various bank accounts. Never got a car, as I couldn’t handle such responsibility. See? I know about adulting.

In more serious terms, being an adult means understanding how society works, learning and following rules, sometimes known as laws, and taking full responsibility for your actions. Yet, this is also true of children. Take a kid to daycare and he’ll soon learn the rules, what is allowed, what you can get away with, how to behave around other children and how not to. They also learn about taking responsibility for their actions. Be disrespectful or annoying and this will earn you some form of punishment. The grown-ups or even your peers will sanction unwanted behavior. Is there much difference between not talking back to the teacher and keeping your mouth shut when your boss says something you don’t agree with? Not really. In school, being too smart for your own good may get you detention, while in a working environment it may get you the boot.

The legal definition of an adult is based on an arbitrary age. Society takes care of a person until they reach the age of maturity, when they’re left to their own devices. It’s a bit like saying - “There’s nothing else we can do for you. Good luck!” (Quiet eye roll!)

An adult is nothing but a bigger child playing with bigger toys, if you ask me. Instead of voting for class president you get to vote for the president of your country. Instead of hating those in a parallel class, you get to hate those in another country. Instead of throwing a ball at your enemy, you get to throw bombs. Definitely, an adult knows more stuff, but at heart it’s just play. As a child, you’re not allowed to play with matches or touch the stove, therefore you feed your doll imaginary meals. Once you’ve mastered the art of fire and are competent enough to boil an egg, you can play at Mom and Dad. It’s all child’s play.

Until you get tired of it. Oddly enough, the phrase “losing your marbles” (often used to signify cognitive impairment associated with old age) has to do with the marbles kids used to play before Barbie and video games. In Romanian, one says about an elderly losing their marbles ‘he’s reverted to a child’s mind’. I remember the story of an old woman who had to be cared for round the clock. She wasn’t unhappy though, just spent her waking hours waiting for her Mom and Dad to come. As scary as losing your memory and your sense of self may be, it is in a way coming full circle. I’ve played at being an adult long enough, now I wanna go back to being a child.

As I was coming back from the store, I saw a pile of sand in a church yard. I could use some for my plants, I thought, but went past it like a decent adult. Until I stopped, thought better about it and realized I could put some in a plastic pot I’d just bought. Sure I can squeeze my hand through the fence. The whole thing felt so childish I’m still laughing about it. My son was shocked nevertheless - “You did what!?” He’s still young, he doesn’t know adults are nothing but older children.

P.S. - If I've been absent from the platform for a couple of weeks it's because I was busy doing adult stuff... arghh!

Thanks for reading!

All images are my own... I love visiting toys' museums!