If a child grows up in a physically and verbally hostile household, she can develop numerous unhealthy behaviors as an adult. Being short-tempered, self-critical and avoiding conflict are examples. In frustrating situations, it can be easy to direct anger at oneself and loved ones. Here is a brief story depicting one method of dealing with this struggle of internal anger. Invoke the power of silliness!
In the first few months that my partner and I were dating, we worked together on a shower install project at his house. As we were attaching the elliptical curtain rod to the ceiling, it suddenly came apart and nearly went crashing to the floor. I braced myself for a flurry of cursing. Instead, he exclaimed “Oopsidoodle!” in a most upbeat sort of way. I looked at him incredulously. Here was a man—who "should" be frustrated and swearing—and he was being…well…silly! We had a good laugh, and ever after when one of us reacts too seriously to a mistake, accident or having something not turn out as planned, one of us says “Oopsie!” and the other finishes with “Doodle!” and that reminds the tense person (usually me!) to relax and realize it’s not the end of the world, for oopsiedoodle’s sake!
I encourage you to add silliness to your daily routine. It will lower your blood pressure and make you a nicer person overall.
I can totally relate to that! I tend to always take myself and situations too serious and having negative self talk when I failed. What really helped me was practicing self-compassion. I am much more kind and understanding towards myself now which also leads to being less judgemental towards others :) Anyway, great post. Upvoted!
Absolutely, @harmonhi! Self-compassion is key and will make your interactions with others so much better as well :)