When I say maturity, I refer to a certain inner integrity Life appears with birth, but wisdom, experience, ecstasy - these must be learned. That's why I insist so much on meditation. The savor of life must be taught, you must grow, mature to live it.
Life can not be known until maturity. But you live and die like children. Never grow up. You do not get mature.
What is maturity?
Baking from a sexual point of view does not mean being mature. Ask the psychologists: they say that the average adult's age is 13-14 years old. The physical body grows, but the mind stops growing at the age of 13-14. No wonder you're acting so stupid, like life
Yours is just a long line of daughters! A mind that has not grown can only do nonsense.
A mindless mind always throws responsibility on others.
You feel unhappy and you are convinced that you are so because those with whom you live make life a hell. "The other is hell." In my opinion, this attitude of Sartre is very immature. For a mature man the other can become equally well with Heaven. In fact, he is what you are already, for he is just the mirror in which you look.
When I say maturity, I mean a certain inner integrity. This will only arise when you will cease to make others responsible for your sufferings when you begin to understand that you are the only ones responsible for them. This is the first step towards maturity: I am responsible. Whatever happens, I'm guilty.
If you feel sad, ask yourself the question: "Whose is the fault?" If you accept that it is your fault, sooner or later you will cease to do many things that you are doing at the moment. In essence, this is the essence of the ancient karma theory.
You are the only responsible. Stop saying that society is responsible, that your parents are to blame, that the economic situation has brought you to this state; Stop taking responsibility on others. You are the only responsible.
At first, it will seem like a burden, because now you can not blame anyone else. But you have to assume ...
Someone asked: "Why are you so sad?"
The person replied: "My wife insisted on not playing cards and other gambling, not smoking anymore and not drinking anymore. I gave up all these things."
The man said, "Your wife must be very happy now."
Person: "This is just the problem Now she has no reason to complain so she is very unhappy She begins to talk, but has no reason to complain She can no longer answer me for her unhappiness. That if I give up all these luys, I will see it happier, but it has become more
unhappy as ever. "
If you continue to cast responsibility on others and everyone would do what you tell them to do, you will sooner or later commit suicide. Eventually, you will not have anyone else to blame.
That's why it's good to keep some mistakes; That helps others to be happy. If there was a perfect husband in the world, his wife would leave him. How can you master a perfect husband? That's why, even if you do not want this, make some mistakes so your wife can dominate and be happy!
If there is somewhere a perfectly safe spouse is the divorce. Find a perfect man and you will be automatically against him, because you can not condemn him, you can not assign him any wrong. Our minds love to cast responsibility on others, to complain, because that's how they feel good, because they do not feel anymore
responsible. But this release is very costly. It is not real, on the contrary, the burden is getting bigger, but you do not realize it.
People live for 70 years, lives in a row, without knowing what life is like. They do not get mature, they do not integrate, they are not centered. They only live in the periphery.
If your periphery meets the periphery of others, the clashes are inevitable. On the other hand, if you are always concerned about the mistakes of others, you can live only at the periphery. If you realize that "I am the only one responsible for my existence. Whatever happens, I am the cause that has generated this," then your consciousness suddenly moves from the periphery to the center. You are just starting to become the center of your existence.
From now on you can do a lot of things. If he does not like something, you can give up; If you like something else, you can adopt it. If it seems to you, you can follow it; If you feel it is not true, you can avoid it, because now you are centered and rooted in itself.