Don't know how to get the nose of the grindstone on or off of work!? Another day off to work for a small job. Summer is half over and it feels as lonely as winter sometimes. Haven't gone camping or anything. I don't understand middle or high class people who go on vacations all the time. There was a time where I never even had more than one week off a year for 5 years and never went camping or on a trip even once. I don't care about that anyway. Don't care about some hoity toity people going on their trips like they are such a successful consumer. I have never even owned a flat screen t.v. Everyone I know has one! I could never afford it and have no place for a t.v. I don't understand people who watch t.v. or play video games all the time.
I don't know where I am going with this this morning. I just get burned out feeling like it's the same day everyday. My hands are still inflamed! I never wanted myself and family to get so tweaked we are having autoimmune disorders. If the set up of society was different we wouldn't have to constantly stress and struggle over money all the time. It's like we never have a life and I can barely stay inspired cause I constantly feel burned out off and on. I feel like a bloody yoyo going up and down but not going anywhere. I hate the way society is currently set up. I hate my culture and my country. It's so fucking stupid to try to base life and society on consumerism and money. It's just fucked. Take it all down!!
We need a change of life or style. A new job or new place to live. I feel trapped that I don't know what different job to get or any place to live that would be better. The government deemed so many thousands of dollars of debt that they would garnishee my wages for many years if I ever get a normal job. I would not be able to live if a couple people weren't helping me right now. I would be completely homeless.
I think I will have a better day. I sometimes get moody/emotional in the morning. I don't want to work. I just want to read and try to make some music and art and all that. Won't be a long day so I can do some of that when I get back. We are depressed around here a bit cause a job outfit hasn't payed us in a month in a half and we needed that money for a long time for basic survival. I find I get worked up in these stress time. I sometimes get bad strings of anxiety attacks for days and weeks on end when things get tight. I get so much stress and anxiety over work and money. I hate money. I wish it did not control everyones life.
Well gotta go, kinda freaking out. Want to talk and think about something else. I will. I will get some meditative art going later.
I feel you! Stay strong, I bet if you keep posting here long enough it won't be long before you can make your income from Steemit.
I feel good about earning crypto because fiat feels so dirty.
albeit I will have to cash my steem into $ at some point but at least I am making my living in a much cleaner way.
I really hope it takes off here for me and you! So we can look back in a few month and laugh at how silly our situations have been previously.
I plan to follow you now since I only joined yesterday and I already feel connected to your post from your deep sharing.
Thank you!
Yes I think our situations can and will get better! Made some decent money here after blogging for a year. Feels a bit dampened with the low price of bitcoin but we will see how the crypto world pans out after the possibility of the bitcoin segwit in august. Cheers! Thanks for the lovely and thoughtful comment!
amazing stuff
Good post, hopefully useful for all
Yeah the rat-race never stopping hamster wheel of life really screws with me too
I feel so many times that I am on top of things and then life comes in and says "FUCK YOU!" and you gotta take another beating.
I hope things get better for ya. All I can say is sleep on things, that is about the only thing that refocuses me and makes the freak out day get cut short.
All I can do is leave you with some random acts of kindness
Yea! I need to make sure I get enough sleep! :) I have a habit of staying up late processing thoughts but it would be better served with some more shut eye I think! Thanks for the great comment gif and random acts of kindness video! Perked me up!
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Thank you @artwatch
Great crazy stuff :D
the second one was just amazing one
Interesting post.
I could talk about how much I agree but to give you some useful info......just remember that thoughts are only thoughts, they are not you. Do what YOU can do and don’t worry about the rest.
Of course easier said than done, but thoughts come and go, if they don’t get you anywhere then they have no value, just let all useless thoughts do what they want, but don’t engage, just watch.
Its good to plan for the future, however you exist now, you don’t know if you will exist (be alive) tomorrow.
Most people get scared of this, but we are just a small part of this play we call the universe.......Just enjoy it!
Yes! It's important to know thoughts and be careful how one talks to themselves! LIfe changes allot and yes it's good to be grateful for just being here! Thank you for the lovely comment!
I agree completely and I am in the same situation. I also hate the way society is set up and I am sicked and tired and burnt out with everything. My Mom keeps asking if I could take a vacation to make me feel better and I always say no because 4 days or a week is just long enough to make me never want to go back to work again. It's not enough to relax and restore me. I want a six month "vacation" where I go commune with nature and feel all of the bullshit from the last 15 years melt away. Clear my head so I can figure out what I really want to do with my life.