Facebook is going the way of the dodo. I can’t complain. I’ve been patiently waiting for the groups that I use on it to find their way to another platform. No such luck so far. And I just can’t walk away from my local groups. Last month I made two new real-life-in-person friends that live near me and traded plants with them, courtesy of my neighborhood Facebook gardening group. I now have two new varieties of bromeliads. Evil Facebook or no, I can’t walk away from bromeliads.
So tonight I was taking a quick peak at what plants might be beckoning to me, and there in my gardening group was a post shaming a group called Fucking Cats Are An Invasive Species, or something to that effect. The woman was warning people not to go check out the cat murderer group, which of course was the best possible advertisement for them, because I know that I’m not the only one who immediately decided to go investigate.
It does indeed exist, and it has 41 members. And apparently it is all about euthanizing outdoor cats. I’m uncertain what ethics come into play here. Is there some sort of guideline, like please check for a collar before murdering someone’s beloved pet, or if it is just more like all outdoor cats must be disbatched. I didn’t join the group, so who knows? I catch and release spiders from my house, so I know I won’t be offing any felines.
But the rabbit hole that is Facebook was not yet done with me tonight. For some mysterious reason searching Fucking Cats Are An Invasive Species brought up not only the intended group, but also one called Are We Dating The Same Guy?— which is apparently becoming a national movement, but this group was specific to my town.
Nowadays not only can you stalk your prospective mate on the internet, now you can easily and discreetly post an ad to aid your stalking. Then local women you don’t even know who he has already pissed off tell you what a low-down dirty louse they think he is. And now Facebook allows you to post anonymously, which adds another layer of complexity to this social experiment.
I have burning questions, and that phrase alone has given me another – are there comments like “that guy gave me an STD?” The rules, which I only skimmed over but seemed kind of conflicting, specifically say it is not for male shaming. But what is the frequency of positivity? Are there comments like “Oh yeah I know that guy. Great person. You should have babies with him because the world needs those genetics to carry on.” Or maybe: “Good date – only belched loudly once during dinner.”
I don’t have the answers to these burning questions because I did not join the group. It didn’t seem right with me being married and joining solely for the purpose of being nosy. I probably shouldn’t feel guilty, because the group has only existed for six months and already has over three thousand members, so I get the feeling there are more than a couple mothers making sure their twenty-year-old sons haven’t made themselves infamous. Or maybe a couple wives just wanting to make sure that business dinner the husband had last week involved more business than cake.
I have a good friend in town that is single, and I told her to join this group as my informant—she could be the ointment for my burning questions. She laughed. I think that means no.
I have the feeling that the guy who created the cat killing group has his picture plastered on the wall of that dating group specific to whatever city he lives in. And I having the sinking feeling he got all bad reviews.
Ugh, I can't even. I still check it occasionally, but the ads are incessant, and I feel like I'm being manipulated. I'll sometimes see a post by a distant friend, made several days ago, with no engagement from anyone (let alone mutuals); but it comes up in my feed.
Yet other times, something from a close friend with heaps of likes and comments from mutuals, never appears on my feed. If the service is free, the product is me.
Yes, what Facebook shows you is irrational and annoying to the user. I have not posted anything to my personal page in years, but simply use it for the local groups. My feed is mostly ads and posts from "suggested" pages, which center around themes that I like (history, for example) but are these sad little snippets of stories, and often poorly researched. The feed is just a time sucker, and I have the sense that it has stolen away minutes of my life every time I look at it. So cheers to mutual Facebook frustration. If only we could get enough people to feel the same, so that we could move the groups elsewhere.
I wonder if there's a group "Are we dating the same cat?" Or "Am I dating a cat murderer?"
I like the "Am I Dating a Cat Murderer" group idea. I can hear the news clip now:
Facebook groups Sara the one thing that keep it going although that cat group needs a kicking!
Yes, it needs a kicking right to the curb, into an enormous unchanged kitty litter box.
They should have to eat said kitty litter as their morning cereal!
I wonder how a group called, I want to murder people who murder cats, would go? Probably not so well I guess. Oh well, luckily I won't have to worry about it as I'm not on Facebook. Also, you're still on Facebook? That surprised me, but then I thought it out some more and I worked it out. 😉
Yep, I just can't walk away from the groups. The Buy Nothing Project is a big one. It is so beneficial to society, and so very un-Facebook like. I give away all the clothes my kids out grow, and all sorts of things. These things then go right into the hands of people that need them and live within a fifteen minute drive of me, rather than donating it to a thrift store and who knows what happens to it. Or worse, trashing it. I guess it comes down to trying to aid the world. We all have our own ways. I do it in a few easy ones within my grasp. First and foremost, I read a ton to my kids and push complex ideas on them, and basically try to make them into intellectuals with consciences - people the world needs. Secondly, I try to prevent waste (with the added benefit of helping others), which is where the Buy Nothing Project comes in. Thirdly, I try to get more people to grow their own food, or just to grow things. So I give away extra plants, seeds, cuttings, whatever. So Facebook connects me with a lot of local people, whether local homeschooling groups, or neighborhood gardening groups.
I also have my share of conspiracy theories about how Facebook is aware of the benefits their groups are giving society, and is working to change that. Ha. But that is a different post entirely.
I understand, especially on that buy nothing group as I know it's turned up some interesting things for you, like my mirror frame you pained on. (My...Lol)
I get the value of that sort of thing and actually think that's great, a really good use of that (otherwise) heinous software.
Talking about your plant sharing group reminded me of how long ago, most of the plants I had in my yards were plants that were shared from family members and friends. We hardly ever bought plants and flowers except a few annuals in the spring to add to the edges of the perennial beds. My mother has plants whose ancestors were in my Grandmother's and Great Grandmother's yards. They are like pieces of your family. I don't have as many flowers and fun plants in the yard now that I am older and lazier, I just haven't kept it going from house to house.
I have a facebook. When I moved back to my hometown from my midlife adventure, some of the folks I went to school with were wanting to have a reunion and encouraged folks from our class to signup and link together on facebook, so I did. After that I added my family and some friends from Texas and the such. I have mine set as private so that only the folks on my friends list can see what I post as I am not looking for strangers to make new friends of there. I don't post much and I don't spend much time there, but I do check it for a minute a time or two a day when I sit down to check emails and the such. Mostly I like seeing when my family post pictures of their children and beach trips and the such and they usually just do that for the rest of the family. Facebook keeps changing what I can see in my stream, just like always and I keep adjusting to try to see my family things. For some reason they keep making that more difficult. After the last big change that was just in the last few weeks, hardly anything I would like to see falls in my stream, so I have to make effort to go see. It is very annoying and I wouldn't mind if my family would all move there stuff somewhere different so I could let facebook go myself, but as long as family posts photos, I will probably keep checking it for a minute or two now and then.
I almost forgot that I am connected to one group there for folks that love vintage aluminum Christmas trees. :)
Oh, I do love your family. I want to add it as an extension of mine. My parents and I trade plants. They are an hour and a half inland from me, so we often have monthly trades of many plants at once. I so dislike the big box hardware store plant culture of let's go buy this expensive pretty plant in this pot and I know nothing about it and I'm not going to find out either, but let's just see if it will serve it's purpose of flowering for a month. It is a disposable world - even plants. I go to Lowe's specifically to hit their clearance rack, and it blows my mind. Usually there is a thousand dollars worth of plants that they just didn't water, or they decided it wasn't blooming anymore. Often times some sad African daisy, or something similar, on the verge of death will talk me into taking it home. I sigh and mutter something like fine, I will take you away from these terrible people. :)
Yes, Facebook has a very annoying set-up with their feed. It is pretty dysfunctional. I stopped posting pictures of anything a few years ago. Funny, but Facebook has inspired me to do the opposite of their philosophy. I now more embrace the idea of not staying in touch with everyone. I just don't really want my second cousin to see much in my life. I don't actually know her. The people that really matter get emails from me with pictures. I like it better that way. I guess that is the voice of an introvert.
I love that there is a group for aluminum Christmas trees.
Are we growing the same turmeric???
Actually, I'm not growing anything. Not on purpose, anyway, although with a little moisture I could probably convince the ginger on my kitchen counter to start sprouting.
There are so many baaaaad baaaaaad baaaaaaaaaad facebook groups. I only go on to see what my favorite author is up to and share stuff to look at later in the memories for years to come. And for messenger.
Oh and sometimes I post in the bone and fossil id group. Which reminds me, I need to do that for some vertebrae I found in the desert...
Growing ginger is pretty impressive. I tried to get some edible ginger from the store to grow...and it just didn't want to. Probably sprayed with something. So congrats on your amazing green thumb :)
The bone and fossil group sounds awesome.
It was more of a negligent thumb than a green one. It probably only grew because I was ignoring it.