I understand the struggle good sir, I too have body dysmorphic disorder, or so that was the label i was given. I was born with a bilateral cleft lip and palate, and for the longest time I struggled with looking in the mirror and tried coping in various ways. I feel like i've finally started to grow out of it.
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Stories like yours make me feel like a whiny asshole, you actually had something wrong and im complaining about not being good looking enough. Thanks for relating though
Nah dude, you are fine. Everyone experiences life differently. Everywhere we look we are being conditioned to feel like we arnt good enough in order to drive consumption of various things.
yes we are, I agree.
Conditioned from the first TV ad we see.
And have you noticed how babies stare transfixed at TV ads?
As soon as the flashy colors are gone, back to whatever else.
Neuroses are a condition too. They can cripple and some don't find a way to overcome them, so don't be dismissive of your condition. You have a serious condition that is affecting your quality of life. I think just admitting it here is brave of you. What is your next plan? What are you truly afraid of?
I can relate on many levels to your issues, and sometimes underneath a neurotic fixation is a deep fear of intimacy. I believe you might be struggling with that? Your fixation with your flaws might be connected with your feelings of lack of control when dealing with romantic relationships? This was the underlying cause of my fixation with STD's, (that still plagues me). My fear of getting STD's was so strong that it kept me away from forming relationships with men. It was the loss of control and fear of rejection that fueled all my neurotic fixations.....Is this perhaps what is underneath your body dysmorphia?