If I could go back 20 or so years I would have raised my kids differently... I was a good mother but I made my share of mistakes. I should have played with them more and cared less about their homework. Planned more hiking and kayaking and creative activities, fewer tutoring sessions. Baked more, cleaned less. Time flew by when they were young--and I wish I could do it all over again and treasure every single minute of their childhoods.
I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. My first boyfriend died in a motorcycle accident the summer after we graduated. He was on his way to a friend's after I cancelled a date. I blamed myself for years.