[EN] β™‘ Flamingirl's Happiness Therapy - πŸ” 4 TIPS to Boost your Self-Confidence β™‘

in #life β€’ 7 years ago (edited)

πŸ‘‰ Link to read the Spanish Version - [ES] β™‘ Flamingirl's Happiness Therapy - Consejos para AUMENTAR TU CONFIANZA! β™‘
πŸ‘‰ Link to read the French Version - [FR] β™‘ Flamingirl's Happiness Therapy - Comment augmenter votre confiance en vous β™‘


Dear steemians,

I would like to talk to you about a subject that is particularly close to my heart: self-confidence.
I notice that lack of self-confidence is a fairly common problem in our society. We live in an era where the image is a priority. The judgment of others on our own person has become a source of anxiety. What does he think of me? Am I in fashion? What photo of me will I put on social networks today? Is the new girlfriend of my ex is prettier than me? ...

All these torments, which are fueled and reinforced by some social networks, are in fact generating stress and can increase a lack of self-confidence. We compare ourselves with others, we play roles against others and the risk is not really knowing who we are. However, self-confidence is a fundamental need to be at peace with oneself and to move forward in life as serenely as possible.

So today I propose some tips to increase your confidence in you my dear steemians.
Steemit is a social platform that allows us to exchange ideas and information. I like being able to use this to boost and help others in my way. Of course, there are many other ways, so feel free to comment and share your ideas on the subject, my friends!

πŸ”πŸ‘ 4 TIPS to Boost your Self-Confidence

πŸ’— Become aware of your Value

You are unique and you have a lot of courage! If someone tells you otherwise, do not listen to him and continue your life, your road, your dreams ...

To stop thinking negatively also depends on the choice you make of the people around you. Unfortunately, there are toxic people who will meet you throughout your life. But if you are confident enough and at peace with yourself, you naturally have the right choices.
Making these choices is also respecting oneself and respecting one's own limits. If you want to help others, you have to help yourself first!

If you are interested in this topic, I invite you to read this:
My first resolution 2018 : Stop negative thinking! 1/2 ;
My first resolution 2018 : Stop negative thinking! 2/2


πŸ’— Master your Internal Dialogue

Your inner dialogue is determined by your thoughts and if you think positively, it improves. But if you get overwhelmed by negative thoughts, your inner dialogue will become negative and will have consequences on the quality of your life.

This is the hardest part for me because we are constantly exposed to negative thinking.
Simply, turn on the tv during the news. After 5 minutes, you want to buy Xanax! πŸ˜…
Personally, since I no longer watch TV I'm much better! ^^

That's why it's important to choose the things you want to watch and the people you want to see.
And yes, life is a matter of choice and sometimes it is enough to change a few habits and it goes immediately better!
If you are interested in this topic, I invite you to read the book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life" by Mark Manson*


πŸ’— Distance yourself

Sometimes we tend to focus on details or situations but is it really necessary?
Whatever happens, the past can not be changed so it is better to focus your energy on the present moment. I noticed that when I feel stressed or feel bad, it is because I am in the past in the future but not in the present moment.
It is not easy to be always in the present moment, that's why I'm doing meditation since last summer.

Meditation is one of the first and most fundamental steps in mastering our internal dialogue. We typically have anywhere between 60,000 to 80,000 thoughts each day and quieting our turbulent mental environment creates the blank canvas upon which to paint a positive internal conversation. When the mind is still it becomes a fertile field that is receptive to the seeds we plant there. source

This practice helps me to feel much better and more able to manage my emotions and therefore my stress.
Moving away from our negative thoughts, immaterial things or people doing a good job! try, you will see :).
If you are interested in this topic, I invite you to read "The power of now" by Eckhart Tolle.


πŸ’— Set goals and self-evaluate

We are not all equal in our confidence in ourselves, but we are masters of our lives, right?
Take action to regain self-confidence is essential! It will not be easy, but necessary to improve the quality of your life. Do not panic, just go in stages. Start small daily challenges and do not forget to cultivate gratitude!

Gratitude is a powerful mental state that causes a palpable transformation in our internal landscape. When we put our attention on those things we can be grateful for, it automatically shifts us out of a negative mentality. Just by simply repeating the statement, I am so grateful for _____, we create positive momentum in our internal dialogue. Focusing on what’s good or uplifting in your life also conditions you to stay vigilant in looking for more of the same gratitude-worthy experiences to come into your lifeβ€”or as the saying goes, where attention goes, energy flows. source

Become aware of your strengths and use them. Put your skills to work and be proud of what you are doing!

The important thing to progress is to set priorities and define your goals for your day, your year, your life ...
Do not be overwhelmed by the priorities of others! Have your own priorities and stay focused on your goals without considering the opinion of everyone.
You will not be rejected if you do this, on the contrary, you will be respected because others will see in you a person who knows where she is going in life.
If you are not used to doing this kind of action, people around you will be surprised by this small change but do not worry, it will get used to it ^^. DonΒ΄t be afraid of being rejected by others because we change and we evolve positively.



[Image 1, 2, 3, 4 credit: Pixabay]

If you liked reading this post, do not hesitate to FOLLOW ME, to UPVOTE and REESTEM 😊.

Thank you for your support, thanks to you I am more and more motivated to write and I like it!

πŸŽ€ FlaminGirl πŸŽ€

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good tips. If you can't change the behavior of people then you can change your surrounding.

True, you are right @introvert-dime. Your behaviour only reflect on people when they admire what yo do. We can change our surrounding with our behaviour or character

wish yu be an extrobert soon.....

Β 7 years agoΒ (edited)Β 

Tottaly agree with you @introvert-dime! Thanks for your comment =D

This article has reminded me a lot of my past experiences. Four years back, i did graduate from high school and thought of joining university. I told to my Dad that i wanted to study in an english speaking country. By then, I was living in Rwanda where i started in French and thought of studying in Uganda in an ENglish system.

I enroled for campus knowing that eeverything will be flowing and then started meeting new people and facing a new language ''English''. I lived the hustle of living with a portable dictionary and i didn't have any smartphone neither a loptop.

I could just sit in class, looking at people, having the desire of talking to them but couldn't know where to start from. A ime reached when i could feel like going back home, but remember Dad had already payed tuition fees.

Time came when i decided to buy a phone from all my remaining pocket money with an eyephone so that i couldn't be bored when others are discusssing.

@flamingirl it took me a hard work and strong determination to speak and read well english. I understood my weeknesses, acknowledged that i needed help and then approached some few responsible friends for support.

I had to set high goals, cramming 20 engish words a day and knowing all the items that i can be buy on some shops, i empowered my self and my confidence rised. I left the people that were lauhing at me and made a decision to excel highly. At the end of it all with hard work, i was a ble to get a first grade in my first year, second semester and could speak as if i grew up speaking english.

Thank you again, This article has remainded me a lot for sure.

@jona12

Thank you, it's useful article, my heart felt stronger. I'm looking forward to read your next article, dear.

awesome tips !
make sure we have found these type of problem you will describe it!
too easy to follow thank you flamingirl !

Thank you for your nice comment @addys!
I try to share my ideas in a language that is not my native language (you'll probably have noticed it ^^). I am super happy if I am understandable! = D

As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are - what others say is irrelevant. And these pictures are amazing by the way.

This is exactly what I think! I totally agree with your comment! Thank you for sharing your ideas and for your support!
All the best πŸ’—

Sure. Thank you too

You can be change to others. At first, people might wonder what you doing but with time, they will adjust. People's priority does not matter, most people fail today cos they want to live the life's of other people forgetting they have their own path to troll. Following oneself heart and learning from mistakes makes us stronger. Nice piece

I completely agree with you @yungchief! I realize this at 30 but as we say here, "it's never too late" ^ ^ I learn every day about it and I evolve. I like to convey this kind of thoughts to the people around me.
I secretly hope the world will become better ...

Yes it's never too late. Life itself is a teacher so we all learn everyday. Just like the late popstar sang Michael Jackson "We are the world, we are the children. We are the ones to make a better day so lets start giving" .
I believe the world will truly be a better place with you in it.

Nice capture

Thanks! ;)

Have anyone told you that you are amazing person? You are the light in darkness, sweet voice of encouragement, messenger of peace. Your post is great, you inspire everyone to become a better person. Please never change, be always who you are, and don't lose your faith in others. Be blessed, creature of God and have wonderful day.

Wow. True talk here... πŸ’— Become aware of your Value.. That's very important to everyone. Great inspirational words...

Thanks a lot my friend!
All the best πŸ’—

Wow..great love..i appreciate this life..

very good you show right way we must follow the rules if we want selfrespect

Oh Thank you for your nice comment @farah-kamran!

Thanks so much for sharing!! such a good post... these are some great tips to live by.. i'm now following you and i'm really looking forward to your next post :) <3 <3

Love this post a lot. Am still trying to master my internal dialogue. And it does affect my daily attitude a whole lot. when it is negative ..i find my self feeling so down and angry.But when it is positive ,i find out that i am very happy and sun-shiny.

Thank you for the highlights. This really helps for those who doubts themselves.

Such valuable advice! This is very relevant to me. Sometimes I feel insecure in new places or circumstances. I want to get rid of this discomfort. Thanks for the article.

Useful tips I would just add two quotation of Schopenhauer who said that "thinking about our plans and anxiously looking to the future, or of giving ourselves up to regret for the past, we should never forget that the present is the only reality, the only certainty" and "our greatest sufferings do not lie in the present, as intuitive representations or immediate feeling, but rather in reason, as abstract concepts, tormenting thoughts" Thanks for post a topic like that Namaste!

This is truly motivational ! This is with full of energy !! Great effort dear @flamingirl ! Namaste !! πŸ™

Self confidance is one geatest in the human succusses thaks for giving mi the self codance ever when life is not good

Namaste 😊

Nice picture of "trolltunga", I live in Norway and I haven't been there even! It's going on my bucket list!

NiΓ±a!! Tienes que traerte toda esa buena vibra a thailandia.
ya sabes si algΓΊn dΓ­a vienes, ya tienes amigos πŸ˜‰

Great article, thanks for the contribution. Sometime I would like to write about my personal experiences with anxiety and my long tough journey with it. Keep up the great work!

This was great, I do think that knowing your self worth is one that is very important. I think women especially, we are really hard on ourselves and how much happier we would be if we just truly knew our worth.

Thanks for a great article. I also can highly recommend The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, life transforming!

Please check out my post for advice in helping with balancing your life around the demands of the internet and social media.

https://steemit.com/psychology/@nick2567/our-infinite-internet-help-me

Very well said and beautiful pictures, was the majority taken in Norway?
I would love to know where, because we are going to spend 6 months there and would sure want to spend some time at those spots.

Buen post! excelentes consejos, los tendrΓ© en cuenta.

Stay away from negativity. That's a big YES! Thanks for this @flamingirl, You have a new follower here. Lots of love from the Philippines.

confidence ...self confidence is every girls secret beauty . No matter how beautifufl once face or body is if one has no self confidence then that beauty is simply drab. No less that Pia Wurzbach a former Ms Universe, the pride of my country said that to be beautiful one must have a beauty a confident beauty or confidently beautiful.....thanks flamingirl for this important points good luck on your succeding write up

AMAZING !!mkovb.jpg

A like them all, but setting goals is the best thing that can boost self confidence. Key is to set some smaller goals and gradually increasing them. I completely agree that we should start small daily challenges and cultivate gratitude!

Thank you for a valuable post!

All these things are basically very simple to follow, they are all very useful tools. But the hardest thing for me is to maintain these practices. To stay persistent and follow through my goals. It is always easier to promise something to someone else but when it comes to myself I am not so fair always. A tip that sometimes works for me and can be useful for more people is to set a goal and tell someone close friend about your goals and how you are going to work towards them.

Have an amazing day!

Hello. I liked your post, keep it up. Good luck to you and have a nice day :)

So beautiful pictures just like what you are saying. Self confidence comes from the bottom of my heart. So I need to train myself everyday in living with my heart. Thank you for sharing~^^

Great post. Are you Norwegian?

Nop I'm french!^^ Why Norwegian? πŸ˜…

Why? I guess the pictures is taken from a very big Norwegian sight.

Trolltungen to be precise :)

So i assumed you where Γ₯ follow Norwegian.

I post alot about Norway and other Scandinavia sights.

So Trolltungen is mentioned a couple times in my blog

Have a great sunday.

Meditation is everything to me. Glad you covered it!
I find it difficult to build my self-confidence as I don't find myself valuable, but I am constantly working on this.
Thank you for reminding me that I need to keep working on it :)